No, that’s not a typo. Weeds’ 100th episode sent Nancy back to California in search of MILF after Silas’s attempt to liberate his plants from the Smith-Johnson lab failed, throwing a wrench in the cogs of her soon-to-be-revived weed empire.
Except this time, she wants to keep things legal. Or mostly legal. Or something.
Most of the residents of Agrestic settled in the rebuilt and renamed development after Guillermo’s arson overkill destroyed the place at the end of Season 3, including Conrad. OMG CONRAD! HI CONRAD!
Conrad’s enthusiasm at seeing Nancy was far more subdued than her (and our) delight at seeing him. That’s understandable, though. According to Conrad, he'd severed ties with Heylia’s operation and left the growing business entirely. He was engaged. He had a sweet house in the swanky Regrestic development, and he had no desire to get messed up with Nancy and the inevitable chaos that followed every scheme she devised. And no, he didn’t have any MILF seeds sitting around... except for the part where he totally did and it wasn’t even that hard for Nancy’s charm to work the truth out of him. Also: HI LUPITA! HI CRAZY PAM!
Though she was mentioned, there was, sadly, no sign of Celia. I’m crossing my fingers for a glorious HBIC entrance next week.
With Conrad willing to lend a hand, there was still the little matter of getting approval to work in a rival gang’s territory—a small detail that Nancy disastrously overlooked the last time she started a business in Agrestic... I mean REgrestic... and by “rival gang” I mean Guillermo’s gang. Like Conrad, Guillermo was generally unhappy to see “Blanca” back in town and justifiably so. He was reluctant to give Nancy his blessing to work in his territory, but the allure of running a clean business was too much to pass up. There was also the matter of Conrad’s gun in his face
So with all of those pesky little particulars in place, it looks like Nancy is back in business. If you think that sounds entirely too simple for an episode of Weeds, you’d be correct.
While Nancy pursued professional success, her entourage on this little cross-country sojourn sought personal satisfaction in their old stomping grounds. A random encounter at an art exhibit reunited Silas and Megan, his awesomely sassy deaf girlfriend from Season 1. Also, the unfortunate first casualty in Silas’s ongoing confusion about how to handle his weird mushy L-word feelings. (HI MEGAN!) When it looked like they’d possibly hit it off again, Silas came clean about that time he poked holes in their condoms in the name of love and knocked up then-teenage Megan, effectively ending their relationship when her parents got involved.
While I appreciated Megan’s initial anger at the revelation, and sure, I’m thrilled that they’re apparently back together because Megan was always my favorite, this is the second episode of something that I’ve watched in the past year (the first being Raising Hope’s “Poking Holes in the Story”) featuring a love-struck teenage boy intentionally impregnating his girlfriend in order to keep her in his life, and I can’t help but be a little alarmed that neither episode made the point that such a practice is WRONG. Weeds certainly came closer, with Megan being upset about it and Silas apologizing, but his repeated justification, “I love you. I always loved you. You were the only girl I ever loved” blah blah blah served as a balm, not just to Megan’s old wounds, but to the audience as well. I love Silas. I adore Silas. But that was always the one thing I struggled with when it came to his character and while he was apologetic when he talked to Megan, I still get the feeling that his regret stemmed from the fact that it didn’t work out, not from the fact that he violated such a sacred trust with the woman he claimed/claims to care so deeply for.
Still, Silas’s love life appears to be in better shape than his uncle’s. After a sad meeting with a Yael (HI YAEL!) who claimed to have no idea who he is, Andy climbed to the roof of the Hebrew school to give Regrestic a nihilistic rant that could have very well been lifted from the pages of Fight Club, “We’re meat and we’re unspecial!” Just to add insult to injury, Andy’s screed went largely unheard by the sheeple of his former hometown, and he joined Nancy on a morbid stroll along the street where Judah had suffered his fatal heart attack almost a decade earlier.
And then they had sex.
No, really. It happened. Right there on the front lawn of some house overlooking the spot where her husband died. It was awkward and felt kind of like it was maybe a small step below hate-sex on Andy’s part. He HAD preceded the deed with the announcement that he would not be returning to Connecticut with Nancy because she was bad for him, that all he had ever wanted was her, and yet she'd never wanted him. He'd followed her like a puppy, and a decade later, he was still a puppy, still tethered to her.
Despite Nancy’s protestations, Andy left her on the sex-lawn, all alone in the spot where years earlier, she’d lost the other most important man in her life.
How do we think this is going to play out?
– Loved the throwback opening credits.
– “So, what are you guys, boyfriend and girlfriend again?” Oh, Guillermo, c’mon. Conrad’s MARRIED now.
– Eh, two episodes left, plenty of time for them to sleep together, married or not.
– I’m so proud of Shane for passing his “fear or loyalty” test in the belly of his hilariously corrupt police force.
– You know, it’s completely appropriate that Doug started a cult. Also: Showtime? I’d watch that spin-off. I’m just saying.