High-five! Low-five! Gimme some skin! It's the weekend, you guys, and with it comes the usual array of promising TV treats. Check it:
What to watch on Friday, February 17...
Things may not be what they seem when Olivia discovers a link between a mental patient and a series of murders. Or maybe they are what they seem? I don't know. Your move, Fringe.
In "Origins," Nikita learns more about the night she was arrested. Elsewhere, Alex admits her true identity at a press conference. Pretty typical spy drama, basically.
In "Repo Man," a serial killing demon resurfaces for another killing spree. Meanwhile Sam and Dean visit a man who's been possessed by that demon in the past in order to gain insight on the demon's M.O. (You know, besides texting at the movies and turning without signaling).
Tonight Crixus becomes separated from the group while Spartacus attempts to lead survivors through the woods to safety. Meanwhile in slightly more clothed news, Lucretia attempts to seek favor with a high-ranking Roman by digging into Ilithyia's past.
PLUS NEW EPISODES OF...
Kitchen Nightmares, 8 p.m., Fox
NAACP Image Awards, AWARDS SPECIAL, 8 p.m., NBC
Radio Rebel, ORIGINAL MOVIE, 8 p.m., Disney
Shark Tank, 8 p.m., ABC
Tyler Perry's House of Payne, 8 p.m., TBS
Undercover Boss, 8 p.m., CBS
A Gifted Man, 9 p.m., CBS
America's Most Wanted, 9 p.m., Lifetime
Ancient Aliens, SEASON 4 PREMIERE, 9 p.m., History
Gold Rush, 9 p.m., Discovery
Primetime: What Would You Do?, 9 p.m., ABC
The Life and Times of Tim, SEASON 3 FINALE, 9 p.m., HBO
On Freddie Roach, 9:30 p.m., HBO
20/20: Remembering Whitney Houston, ORIGINAL SPECIAL, 10 p.m., ABC
Bering Sea Gold, 10 p.m., Discovery
Blue Bloods, 10 p.m., CBS
Curious & Unusual Deaths, 10 p.m., Discovery Fit & Health
Dateline NBC, 10 p.m., NBC
Four Weddings, 10 p.m., TLC
Merlin, 10 p.m., Syfy
Portlandia, 10 p.m., IFC
Real Time with Bill Maher, 10 p.m., HBO
Marvel Anime: Blade, 11 p.m., G4
Russell Simmons Presents the Ruckus, 11 p.m., Comedy Central
Dave Salmoni on Tonight Show with Jay Leno, 11:35 p.m., NBC
Kristen Wiig and Mike Birbiglia on Late Show with David Letterman, 11:35 p.m., CBS
Margaret Cho on Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson, 12:37 a.m., CBS
Ricky Gervais and Thandie Newton on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon, 12:35 a.m., NBC
What to watch on Saturday, February 18...
Saturday Night Live
Tonight Maya Rudolph returns to walk the boards of 30 Rockefeller Plaza, and she'll presumably bring with her a smattering of classic characters. Also along for the ride: Sleigh Bells, the brain-melting thrash-pop duo who will stop at nothing to turn America's youth deaf.
SEASON 1 FINALE, 9pm, BBC America
It's all been building to this: Series 1 of the moody BBC supernatural teen drama concludes with a showdown between the Angelics and the Fades. Y'all been watching this show? It's really good!
2012: Ice Age
So this Syfy Original isn't brand-new (but really, are they ever?), but at least it's timely! In that it is presently 2012. Anyway, 2012: Ice Age tells the tale of a family desperate to flee a world-threatening volcanic eruption that could plunge everybody into another ice age.
After last weekend's false alarm, The Firm actually will air its "Chapter Seven" episode tonight and it details a case in which two brothers are forced to betray each other and the over-arching storyline continues to be duuulllll.
PLUS NEW EPISODES OF...
My Cat From Hell, 8 p.m., Animal Planet
Victorious, 8 p.m., Nickelodeon
Oddities, 9 p.m., Science
Parking Wars, 9 p.m., A&E;
Suze Orman Show, 9 p.m., CNBC
48 Hours Mystery, 10 p.m., CBS
An Idiot Abroad: The Bucket List, 10 p.m., Science
Billy the Exterminator, 10 p.m., A&E;
Graham Norton Show, 10 p.m., BBC America
Nick Cannon: Mr. Showbiz, ORIGINAL SPECIAL, 11 p.m., Comedy Central
Would You Rather? With Graham Norton, 11 p.m., BBC America
What to watch on Sunday, February 19...
500th EPISODE, 8pm, Fox
Has it really only been 500 episodes? I would've guessed more in the six-figure range, but anyway: Tonight the Simpsons find themselves banished from Springfield and forced to live in an off-the-grid, post-apocalyptic shanty town called "The Outlands." Here's to 500 more!
SEASON 3 PREMIERE, 10pm, HBO
Eastbound & Down
Season 3 picks up some time after the events of the Season 2 finale, so when we meet Kenny he's already in Myrtle Beach playing minor league baseball and April's planning their son's first birthday party. But who cares: KENNY M.F.in' POWERS is BACK.
SERIES PREMIERE, 10:30pm, HBO
Life's Too Short
Hey look, it's the eagerly awaited premiere of the new Gervais-Merchant mockumentary series, Life's Too Short! Owing more to Extras than The Office, this one follows real-life little person actor Warwick Davis as he deals with a crumbling marriage, bad job prospects, and partners Ricky Gervais and Stephen Merchant who take meetings with celebrities looking to play themselves in a future show. In tonight's premiere: Noted comic actor Liam Neeson swings by to pitch his comedy chops.
SEASON 20 PREMIERE, 8pm, CBS
The Amazing Race
The 20th season of the venerable CBS reality show returns tonight with 11 new teams of easily definable "types," including Big Brother couple Rachel and Brendan. In tonight's premiere the teams must skydive from 10,000 feet. That's unexpected! Not really.
Once Upon a Time
In "What Happened to Frederick," David comes clean to Kathryn about his affair with Mary Margaret, plus Prince Charming pauses his search for Snow White in order to help Abigail find something she's lost.
The Walking Dead
Picking up where last week's episode left off, tonight Lori will encounter some trouble on the road after crashing the car. Meanwhile Rick, Glenn, and Hershel face some unexpected consequences of their saloon shoot-out.
SEASON 12 PREMIERE, 9pm, NBC
The Celebrity Apprentice
Donald Trump presents a new menagerie of celebrity types for our scrambling, arguing, and carnival-barking pleasure. These include: Clay Aiken, Debbie Gibson, Adam Carolla, Lisa Lampanelli, and Penn Jillette.
PLUS NEW EPISODES OF...
60 Minutes, 7 p.m., CBS
America's Funniest Home Videos, 7 p.m., ABC
Dateline NBC, 7 p.m., NBC
The Cleveland Show, 7:30 p.m., Fox
Little People, Big World: Battle for the Farm, ORIGINAL SPECIAL, 8 p.m., TLC
Mob Wives, 8 p.m., VH1
Napoleon Dynamite, 8:30 p.m., Fox
Desperate Housewives, 9 p.m., ABC
Downton Abbey, 9 p.m., PBS
Family Guy, 9 p.m., Fox
Hoarding: Buried Alive, 9 p.m., TLC
Luck, 9 p.m., HBO
Nightmare Next Door, 9 p.m., Investigation Discovery
Oprah's Next Chapter, 9 p.m., OWN
Shameless, 9 p.m., Showtime
The Real Housewives of Atlanta, 9 p.m., Bravo
Worst Cooks in America, 9 p.m., Food Network
American Dad!, 9:30 p.m., Fox
'I Ain't Scared of You': A Tribute to Bernie Mac, ORIGINAL SPECIAL, 10 p.m., Comedy Central
Comic Book Men, 10 p.m., AMC
Cruise Ship Disaster: Inside the Concordia, ORIGINAL SPECIAL, 10 p.m., Discovery
CSI: Miami, 10 p.m., CBS
Finding Bigfoot, 10 p.m., Animal Planet
House of Lies, 10 p.m., Showtime
My Strange Addiction, 10 p.m., TLC
Pan Am, SEASON 1 FINALE, 10 p.m., ABC
Californication, 10:30 p.m., Showtime
Ice Loves Coco, SEASON 2 PREMIERE, 10:30 p.m., E!
China, IL, 12 a.m., Cartoon Network
Talking Dead, 12 a.m., AMC
Mary Shelley's Frankenhole, 12:15 a.m., Cartoon Network
What are you watching this weekend?