What to watch on Friday, February 15...
History of the Eagles, Part One
Desperado, why don’t you come to your senses and watch this chronicle of one of the biggest bands of the 1970s? Take it easy and enjoy archival footage, interviews, and concert clips documenting how life in the fast lane surely made them lose their minds, even as they took it to the limit one more time before breaking up in the sad cafe in 1980. Director Alison Ellwood helms this documentary with no lyin’ eyes. Something something Hotel California.
Guillermo searches for the 36 Righteous Ones, and if that were spelled just slightly differently (maybe “36 Righteous 1s”) I would be convinced they were some sort of circa-late-'90s Christian-pop boy band. Elsewhere in “Enemy of My Enemy,” Jake helps Lucy locate a woman with connections to her missing daughter.
WINTER PREMIERE, 9pm, Disney
One of this season’s giddiest new shows returns with “Boss Mabel,” wherein the Pines sister tries to prove she can run the Mystery Shack more profitably than Grunkle Stan, who’s off competing on a TV game show. Also, a gigantic monster called a Gremloblin causes mischief, as gigantic monsters are wont to do.
"CATCH-UP" MINI-MARATHON, 9pm, Starz
Spartacus: War of the Damned
No new episode this week, as Starz re-airs the first three episodes of the season back-to-back-to-back. Catch up on the kooky misadventures of Sparty, Gannicus, “Howlin’ Mad” Crixus, Boss Crassus, and the whole gang!
In “Wicks,” Lucas is troubled by the reappearance of an ex-con from his past, while Proctor’s casino expansion plans are impeded by a recalcitrant reverend who refuses to sell his home to make way. Fans of complex zoning ordinances and eminent domain disputes, this may be the hour of the week you’ve been waiting for!
MARATHON, 12am, USA
Psych's Slumber Party
While away the wee hours of the morning with everyone’s favorite wise-cracking, squabbling detective duo (Non-Rescue Rangers Division). The marathon crams seven fan-selected episodes into six hours, punctuated by viewer-made videos, contests, and wacky interstitials of Shawn and Gus behaving like adolescent girls.
– Kathy Griffin, David Feherty, and FM Radio on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno, 11:35pm, NBC
– Helen Hunt, Jeff Caldwell, and The Maccabees on Late Show with David Letterman, 11:35pm, CBS
– Highlights from earlier in the week on Jimmy Kimmel Live, 11:35pm, ABC
– Joan Rivers, Josh Charles, and Gloriana on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon, 12:37am, NBC
– Mario Lopez on The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson, 12:37am, CBS
WHAT ARE YOU WATCHING ON FRIDAY?
What to watch on Saturday, February 16...
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
In “Magical Mystery Cure,” a spell gone awry mixes up everyone’s Cutie Marks—the founts of their very identities and purposes in the universe. Twilight must find a way to reverse the change, lest Rarity be forced to harvest apples and Rainbow Dash to nurture tiny woodland creatures, or other such entirely unsuitable destinies.
Beyoncé: Life Is But a Dream
HBO takes you behind the scenes of the superstar singer’s rise and... continued rise. Enjoy the blend of documentary, concert film, and intimate profile of her private life which will someday be considered an foundational text of the waning era before the United States amended the Constitution to restore the monarchy and anointed Queen Beyoncé I and King Jay-Z to lead us into the 100-year Golden Age.
9pm, BBC America
A jewel heist puzzles Reid in “The Weight of One Man’s Heart.” The possible involvement in the crime of British army veterans—including Drake’s old commanding officer, played by guest-star Iain Glen—tests the detective’s loyalties.
Saturday Night Live
Christoph Waltz hosts, and we all pray to the gods of sketch comedy that he isn’t shoved into a riff on “The Californians” called “The Bavarians” or something. Members of musical guest Alabama Shakes are praying doubly hard, because they’d have to watch that shit in person, man.
WHAT ARE YOU WATCHING ON SATURDAY?
What to watch on Sunday, February 17...
SEASON 22 PREMIERE, 8pm, CBS
The Amazing Race
“Business in the Front, Party in the Back,” is the name of the season opener, and if that means every team will be required to sport bitchin’ mullets during the entire competition, I might give this show a shot for the first time. The 11 teams kick off the race in Bora Bora, with the winners of the first leg netting a pair of challenge-skipping passes—but the prize carries a shocking twist.
Remember when South Park joked that there were no more stories left for animated comedies that The Simpsons hadn’t already done after so many years on the air? The shoe is on the other cartoon foot this week, as the plot of “Hardly Kirk-ing”—Milhouse grooms himself into becoming a doppelganger of his father—echoes Gene’s “Little Bob” runner a couple of weeks ago on Bob’s Burgers. Has The Simpsons become the Microsoft of sitcoms, resigned to being outfoxed by hungry young startups?
It’s Labor Day in the Hamptons, and woe betide you if you’re found wearing white after today, now that Victoria is stone-cold shooting anyone who gets under her skin. Meanwhile in “Sacrifice,” Jack and Amanda set off on their honeymoon voyage aboard the S.S. Impending Doom.
The Good Wife
When Alicia and Cary face off against Will and Diane in a mock trial in “Red Team, Blue Team,” underlying tensions come to a head. On the campaign front, Eli is beset by challenges to his position both internal and external, while Peter remains blissfully oblivious of pretty much anything that doesn’t help him maintain a great head of hair.
SERIES 3 FINALE BUT REALLY THE SERIES 3 CHRISTMAS SPECIAL, 9pm, PBS
The Granthams are going to Scotland! Specifically, to a hunting lodge owned by Rose’s parents in the vast Caledonian wilderness. Back at Downton, Mrs. Patmore may have found her very own Sam the Butcher in the person of a local merchant, while a new maid has eyes for Branson. Don’t we all, new maid. Don’t we all. [Ed. Note: If you've already seen the episode, please avoid spoilers in the comments!]
The Walking Dead
The Governor lays the smackdown on the unruly elements within Woodbury, while Merle and Daryl grapple with regrets in “Home.” Keep your homemade Rick’s Sanity Scorecards handy, in case this is the week he starts palling around with a giant invisible rabbit-zombie named Harvey.
SEASON 4 PREMIERE, 9pm, Food Network
Worst Cooks in America
Celebrity chefs Anne Burrell and Bobby Flay are on a mission to turn 14 of America’s most abysmal food-slingers into magnificent magicians of meringue, entrancing entrepreneurs of entrées, and inimitable impressarios of ingredients. Or at least to teach them not to make stew with an old boot in it.
Adam talks Ray into a Staten Island excursion as “Boys” turns a spotlight on the Y-chromosome-carrying half of the cast. Meanwhile, a sulking Jenna bunks with Hannah, who’s under the gun of a tight deadline to submit an e-book, and Marnie hosts Booth Jonathan’s (inevitably horrifying) art party. Hey, if you don’t watch this, how will you understand what everyone on the internet is arguing about all week long?
WHAT ARE YOU WATCHING ON SUNDAY?
And now, let's all vote to crown the What to Watch Tonight Episode Title of the Week!