What to watch on Wednesday, January 29...
Super Bowl’s Greatest Commercials 2014
Boomer Esiason and Sarah Shahi host a rundown of the most beloved works of overpriced and, according to recent studies, largely ineffectual marketing ever to grace the big game’s uber-premium ad breaks. Viewers can vote for their favorites from among such classic offerings as the one with the precocious kid, the staggeringly misogynistic one, and the one where animals do things that normally only humans do but animals are doing them instead so it’s amusing.
8pm, The CW
In “Tremors,” Arrow trains Roy to master his new arsenal of abilities, and possibly they also fight giant killer mutant worms. On the villain front, Bronze Tiger busts out of prison and absconds with Malcolm’s Earthquake-O-Matic 2800.
As the old adage goes, “every rose has its thorn.” That’s especially true of “Happy Endings,” if by “rose” you mean “episode of Revolution,” and by “thorn,” you mean “guest appearance by Bret Michaels,” and by “every,” you mean, “this one.” Monroe, Connor, and Charlie are pretty sure that math checks out, but they’ve got a dangerous new mission to execute so they didn’t really review it all that closely.
8pm, ABC Family
Melissa & Joey
Joe’s live-in nannying gig leaves him precious little time to see Mel, but she risks getting him canned when she sneaks over to his new house in “The New Deal.” I mean, she was just asking for trouble when she used a ladder to climb into his bedroom window. Who even does that?
With George slouching toward slackerhood in “Open Door Policy,” Tessa enlists her grandfather’s help setting him straight. If that weren’t muddling her mind enough, she also gets word that Ryan will be visiting Chatswin—with a new girlfriend in tow.
A murder suspect raises a ruckus in the morgue, everyone’s favorite creepy M.E. gets taken hostage, and long story short, that’s how you get an episode titled “Someone’s Got a Woody.”
Miley Cyrus Unplugged
The pop star performs acoustic variations on some of her biggest hits, including many new cuts off her latest album, Bangerz. Think of it more like a “chill hang” in the U.S.A.
Law & Order: SVU
Benson dons her sergeant’s badge in “Betrayal’s Climax,” which finds the squad searching for an abducted teenager and butting heads with her recalcitrant beau.
9pm, The CW
The Tomorrow People
Trainee Hillary (Alexa Vega) triggers Stephen’s Spidey-sense in “Sitting Ducks,” but are her ulterior motives baleful or benign? The new addition to Stephen’s home life, Peter, is also the subject of some side-eye as the family prepares to hit the great outdoors.
SEASON 3 FINALE, 10pm, FX
American Horror Story: Coven
Like leavened dough, the Planet of the Apes, and the sun also, a new Supreme rises as “The Seven Wonders” drops the curtain on the witch-centric season.
A remorseless Juliette embraces her Grand Ole Opry antics in “It’s All Wrong, but It’s All Right.” Meanwhile, Luke has twin treats for Rayna: a lead on her distribution deal, and some sweet NASCAR swag.
MINISERIES PREMIERE, 10pm, BBC America
Fleming: The Man Who Would be Bond
Dominic Cooper stars as Ian Fleming, creator of James Bond, in this four-part blend of fact and fiction centering on the author’s early life. As the series opens, Fleming is a wealthy young gadfly whose life of idleness is interrupted by the onset of World War II and his new post in Naval Intelligence.
Men at Work
Full Steam’s new head honcho (David Krumholtz) is determined to reduce his headcount by one in “Holy New Boss!” Arriving to work three sheets to the wind makes Neal the likely victim, unless the fellas can snap him back into shape.
10:30pm, Comedy Central
“P**** Weed” finds the ladies embracing adult responsibilities solo, like Ilana doing her own taxes and Abbi procuring her own herb.
10:30pm, TV Land
In “Maddie vs. Maddie,” our heroine runs across the real Madison Banks (Kristen Johnston), an ex-actress on whom she stepped en route to stardom. The jilted party takes extreme measures to claim both revenge and a second chance at the spotlight.
– Paula Abdul, Monica Potter, Les Twins, and Vernon Davis on The Arsenio Hall Show, Syndicated, check local listings
– Don Cheadle, Josh Hopkins, and Hard Working Americans on Conan, 11pm, TBS
– Emma Roberts on Chelsea Lately, 11pm, E!
– Johnny Knoxville on The Daily Show with Jon Stewart, 11pm, Comedy Central
– Cris Carter on The Colbert Report, 11:30pm, Comedy Central
– Bill Maher, Whitney Cummings, and Jennifer Nettles on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno, 11:35pm, NBC
– Drew Brees, David Stern, B.J. Novak, and Against Me! on Late Show with David Letterman, 11:35pm, CBS
– Andy Garcia, chef Norman Van Aken, and Broken Bells on Jimmy Kimmel Live, 11:35pm, ABC
– Jennifer Connelly, Miles Teller, Ronan Farrow, and Sheng Wang on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon, 12:37am, NBC
WHAT ARE YOU WATCHING TONIGHT?