What to Watch Tonight: Burn Notice, Person of Interest in the Suburbs, and Last Resort

What to watch on Thursday, November 8...

The Burn Notice gang is back.

If you're anything like me, you're having a really hard time adjusting to this Daylight Savings time shift! It gets dark at like noon now! To combat the feeling of impending doom, do what I do: Close all your blinds and turn the brightness on your TV all the way up and it will be like a tropical vacation with all your favorite characters. Problem solved, and you'll get a sweet tan. Or is it cancer? I forget. Let's settle the difference and call it tancer. And there's plenty of great tancer-causing TV on tonight:

8pm, ABC
Last Resort
It's "Another Fine Navy Day" for Captain Marcus Chaplin and his band of merry seamen, and I'm pretty sure the show is being sarcastic with that episode title because in it, the crew gets attacked with an unknown weapon that makes everyone crazy and stabby. The last time all my friends freaked out on each other like that, it was a mediocre day at best. Let's all tune in and try and get this show a second season, okay?

8pm, NBC
The Voice
Take a hike, comedy! The Voice airs a special live Thursday episode to announce the results of this week's playoff rounds. Will it be that one person or that other person who makes it to the Top 12? Or will it be that OTHER person? Or that OTHER OTHER person? You get the idea. Maroon 5 also performs, which automatically makes this episode a must-watch (if you're into that sort of thing).

8:20pm Eastern / 5:20pm Pacific, NFL Network
NFL Football: Colts vs. Jaguars
This matchup between the upstart rebuilding Indianapolis Colts and the absolutely dismal Jacksonville Jaguars sounds boring, but that's why mankind invented gambling. Inaccuscore prediction: Colts 243, Jaguars 3.

9pm, USA
Burn Notice
Get double the burning sensation as the USA spy drama returns for the second of Season 6 with two episodes. Nate's still murdered and Card is now a two-timer, so how will Michael and his team get revenge for being set up? Lots of bullets and explosions, probably.

9pm, The CW
Beauty and the Beast
If you needed more evidence that being a "beauty" is way better than being a "beast," listen to what happens in "Saturn Returns": Vincent, the *ahem* "beast," stops a robbery at a convenience store only to have his horribly disfigured and high-cheekboned face plastered all over the newspapers. Meanwhile in Everything is Just Great Land, Catherine, the "beauty," has to postpone her birthday plans so her sister can throw her a surprise birthday party. How about a little positive energy for the beast, C-Dub?!?

9pm, CBS
Person of Interest
Those of you who've been petitioning for a Person of Interest and Suburgatory crossover, you'll almost get it in "The High Road," in which the computer sends John Reese to one of the most dangerous places in the world... THE SUBURBS! There he'll play house with Zoe as they pretend to be typical knee-shooting neighbors. This has corny fun written all over it. Bonus: Roy from The Office guest-stars!

9:30pm, NBC
Parks and Recreation
Mike from Breaking Bad (Jonathan Banks) guest-stars as Ben's dad, who will likely be awesomely terrifying. Need I say more? Oh, alright: Jean-Ralphio returns! And probably some cute Leslie-and-Ben-are-engaged-now stuff, too.

10:30pm, FX
The League
In "Judge MacArthur," Kevin tries his hand at becoming a judge, which lands him at a charity event with perennial fantasy football waiver-wire pickup Ryan Fitzpatrick of the Buffalo Bills. The guys also compare something other than their penis size and their SO's cup sizes when they take intelligence tests.


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