What to Watch Tonight: The Series Premiere of American Horror Story, the Return of South Park, and Up All Night

What to watch on Wednesday, October 5...

Please take a break from the saxophone practice for a second— YES, you are good at saxophone. YES, your saxophone playing is sensual and captivating. YES, the quiet storm has arrived. But listen to me: It's time to watch TV!

SERIES PREMIERE, 10pm, FX
American Horror Story
It's been a while since we've had a good, old-fashioned horror serial on TV, but is Ryan Murphy really the person to bring it to us? (We ALL know how Nip/Tuck ended up.) Anyway, American Horror Story follows a young family (headed up by Connie Britton and Dylan McDermott) attempting to make a fresh start after infidelity issues and a miscarriage. But will their relocation to a haunted L.A. mansion help or hinder things? HINT: It doesn't help.

MIDSEASON PREMIERE, 10pm, Comedy Central
South Park
Picking up where spring's incredibly downbeat midseason finale left off, Stan is still dealing with cynicism and Cartman comes to suspect he has Asberger's. Will their prognoses improve? Everyone knows that happiness is only a fecal-matter joke away.

8pm, NBC
Up All Night
Tonight Reagan and Chris continue to fight the good fight against their increasing uncoolness by shopping for a family car that won't look embarrassing. Plus Ava decides to incorporate more serious topics into her show, but doesn't want to have to actually deal with serious things. The classic Oprah Winfrey vs. Wendy Williams talk show host conundrum!

10pm, NBC
Law & Order: SVU
When a pregnant 13-year-old girl (OBVIOUSLY the plot starts this way) won't reveal who got her pregnant, the team must investigate all the possible statutory rapists in the area. This show.

SERIES PREMIERE, 10pm, Discovery
Penn & Teller Tell a Lie
Penn & Teller have made a career of being snarky, intelligent skeptics of the fringes of the entertainment world, and their new Discovery series promises to continue that tradition. In Penn & Teller Tell a Lie, the magicians present seven outrageous stories or scenarios, and by the end you'll have to decide which story is the false one. Fine, GAME ON, you guys.

ORIGINAL SPECIAL, 9pm, HBO
George Harrison: Living in the Material World
Martin Scorsese directs this two-part special (Part 2 airs tomorrow night) about George Harrison, the late, great Beatle who forged an incredible career through experimentation in music, drugs, religion, Indian music, the arts scene, and British cooking. (I'm guessing.)

PLUS NEW EPISODES OF...
H8R, 8 p.m., CW
I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant, 8 p.m., TLC
Survivor: South Pacific, 8 p.m., CBS
The Middle, 8 p.m., ABC
The X Factor, 8 p.m., Fox
Free Agents, 8:30 p.m., NBC
Suburgatory, 8:30 p.m., ABC
America's Next Top Model, 9 p.m., CW
Criminal Minds, 9 p.m., CBS
Ghost Hunters, 9 p.m., Syfy
Harry's Law, 9 p.m., NBC
Law & Order: UK, 9 p.m., BBC America
Modern Family, 9 p.m., ABC
MythBusters, 9 p.m., Discovery
Happy Endings, 9:30 p.m., ABC
Raising Hope, 9:30 p.m., Fox
CSI: Crime Scene Investigation, 10 p.m., CBS
Dance Moms, SEASON 1 FINALE, 10 p.m., Lifetime
Dark Matters: Twisted but True, SEASON 1 FINALE, 10 p.m., Science
Extreme Couponing, 10 & 10:30 p.m., TLC
Luther, 10 p.m., BBC America
Paranormal Witness, 10 p.m., Syfy
Real World, 10 p.m., MTV
Revenge, 10 p.m., ABC
The Ultimate Fighter, 10 p.m., Spike
Top Chef: Just Desserts, 10 p.m., Bravo
Who the (Bleep) Did I Marry?, 10 p.m., Investigation Discovery
Nick Swardson's Pretend Time, SEASON 2 PREMIERE, 10:30 p.m., Comedy Central
Blue Mountain State, 11 p.m., Spike

LATE-NITE PICKS:
Evan Rachel Wood & Portishead on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon, 12:35 a.m., NBC
George Clooney on Late Show with David Letterman, 11:35 p.m., CBS
Gloria Estefan & Ana Gasteyer on The Wendy Williams Show, 12 a.m., BET
Hugh Jackman on Daily Show with Jon Stewart, 11 p.m., Comedy Central
Joel McHale on Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson, 12:37 a.m., CBS
Mos Def & Talib Kweli on Colbert Report, 11:30 p.m., Comedy Central
Paul Haggis on Last Call with Carson Daly, 1:35 a.m., NBC
Will Arnett on Jimmy Kimmel Live, 12 a.m., ABC

 

What are you watching tonight?

Comments (44)
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American Horror Story was AMAZING!!!
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Revenge, SVU, South Park
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Have given up Up All Night. I'll watch Modern Family and Criminal Minds. Checking out American Horror Story as well...
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Modern Family, Happy Endings, The Middle, and might as well Suburgatory.
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The Middle, Modern Family, Happy Endings and South Park.
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American Horror Story, South Park, Raising Hope, Suburgatory, Revenge, Modern Family and maybe Up All Night.
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Cool, didn't know there was another Raising Hope episode this week.



Also watching Up All Night, Suburgatory, Modern Family, and South Park.
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suburgatory, free agents, harry's law, criminal minds, CSI, south park, revenge, raising hope, American Horror Story
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I'll try AHS; other than that, for sure: South Park, Happy Endings, Modern Family, and Penn & Teller. They have a show in the UK called "Fool Us," about other magicians performing tricks and P&T trying to figure out if they know how it's done. If you like P&T, check it out.
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I watched Fool Us, cool stuff. I loved to read some forums where people tried to understand the tricks.
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Survivor, Criminal Minds, Ghost Hunters and American Horror Story.
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Survivor and Revenge!!!
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1st Revenge and 2nd Criminal minds
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I don't know if anyone else is facing this problem but when I click on " more reviews " at any episode's page any page , It appears to me the reviews of one of true blood episodes
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Thanks for the heads up - we'll be addressing this with a number of other small issues very soon!
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Criminal Minds for me
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ghost hunters, paranormal witness, american horror story, ultimate fighter
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The Middle and Modern Family.
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COMMUNITY!!! Oh wait, Shit, it's only Wednesday . . . . FU@#$%!
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ABC: The Middle,Suburgatory,Modern Family,Happy Endings and Revenge.

CBS: Nothing

NBC: Up all Night,Harry's Law,Law & Order:SVU

FOX: Nothing

CW: Nothing

FX: American Horror Story
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American Horror Story, Revenge
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Cannot wait for American Horror Story. Also watching Modern Family, Suburgatory, Happy Endings, and Revenge.
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With trembling fear, and not because I think it would be scary... American Horror Story. Law&Order SVU, Suburgatory, ANTM, Criminal Minds, Happy Endings, Revenge
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American Horror Story
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Criminal Minds and South Park. Can't wait to see what they do with this now.
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Up All Night, Free Agents, The Middle, Modern Family, Suburgatory, Happy Endings, Criminal Minds, Blue Mountain State, and A SPECIAL EPISODE OF RAISING HOPE!!!!
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Being a cynical asshole myself, I must find out what Stan does next...
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In the Middle, Suburgatory, Modern Family, Raising Hope and CSI.
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American Horror Story, Suburgatory, Up All Night, Modern Family, Happy Endings, Harry's Law, Revenge, and Law and Order: SVU
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Happy Endings, Modern Family, Up All Night, Free Agents, and The LLS w/ CF.



Maybe Suburgatory, maybe Revenge, maybe American Horror Story.
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American Horror Story and a bunch more stuff
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suburgatory (very entertaining!)

criminal minds
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Up All Night, Survivor, The Middle, ANTM, Harry's Law, Modern Family, Raising Hope and Revenge
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Happy Endings, Modern Family, Suburgatory, The Middle, Up All Night
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suburgatory

criminal minds

harry's law

american horror story

csi: crime scene investigation

revenge
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The Middle, The X Factor, Up All Night (they canceled The Playboy Club but not this? losers), Suburgatory, Happy Endings, Raising Hope, Revenge, American Horror Story, Blue Mountain State, Joel McHale on Craig Ferguson, and Evan Rachel Wood on Jimmy Fallon
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Suburgatory, Criminal Minds, Happy Endings and Revenge
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AMERICAN. HORROR. STORY.



But also Up All Night (meh), Free Agents (double meh), The Middle, Suburgatory, Modern Family, and Revenge. All those will most likely pale in comparison to AHS, though.
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Criminal Minds, CSI, and Modern Family.
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maybe Free Agents, Law & Order: UK, Ghost Hunters, Criminal Minds, Harry's Law (online or on Saturday), CSI, Revenge (online), maybe American Horror Story (online), etc...
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American Horror Story, Suburgatory, Modern Family, Happy Endings.
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Up All Night, Modern Family, Raising Hope, Harry's Law (might drop this if ratings go down), American Horror Story, and Blue Mountain State
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The Middle, Up All Night, Suburgatory, Modern Family, Raising Hope, South Park, American Horror Story, Paranormal Witness, Nick Swardson and NewNowNext. And inventing a time machine to eventually watch it all.
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American Horror Story (might as well, right?), Free Agents, Suburgatory, Criminal Minds and Penn & Teller Tell a Lie
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