What to watch on Thursday, January 19...
Wait, it's only Thursday? Dang, week, what's your problem? Oh well, at least there are literally a million good shows on tonight*:
The Vampire Diaries
Perennially underdeveloped character Bonnie Bennett is about to get a lot more screen time (and even a house)! For example, we'll finally get to meet her suspiciously young-looking mother Abby Bennett and Abby's handsome young friend with whom Bonnie may or may not strike up a romance. Meanwhile we'll also learn more about that weird murder at the end of last week's episode, and Tyler will try much harder to regain his free will, which may or may not involve getting himself shirtlessly chained up and shouted at by Caroline's evil gay dad. (Don't ask.)
Person of Interest
This week's installment of Sentient Computers 'n Heroes involves Det. Carter's official introduction to Reese, and her subsequent decision about whether or not to assist in a case involving a young lawyer. Oh, just do it, Carter.
Now that Robert California's divorced he's considering selling his Scranton mansion, but Kevin suggests he throw a last-bash pool party for the office. Cool! (It's winter.) Elsewhere, Erin attempts to make Andy jealous by flirting with Dwight. (I'm not sure this is a good idea.)
SEASON 3 PREMIERE, 10pm, FX
Since the last season of Archer ended we've seen Jon Benjamin Has a Van, and it might be kind of hard to unsee the real man behind the spy. Oh well, that'll probably pass. In tonight's Season 3 premiere, Sterling gets upset when he discovers that Mallory is dating Burt Reynolds (as himself) and must get over these hurt feelings in order to evade the Cuban hit squad currently targeting him.
The Secret Circle
This show's primary backstory gets a long-awaited unpacking tonight when Cassie helps Jake recover some buried memories regarding their parents' involvement in a boat fire 16 years ago. Meanwhile Faye's sexy voodoo times continue but take a turn for the annoying when one of Lee's bad-news friends visits the garage. Voodoo foul!
SERIES PREMIERE, 10:30pm, FX
What the world needs now is another half-hour animated series for adults! Just kidding, the world has plenty of those already, so hopefully this is a good one? Airing on the heels of the decidedly hilarious Archer, Unsupervised tells the tales of a pair of teenage best friends who attempt to live a more adult lifestyle after they realize they have no parental supervision.
PLUS NEW EPISODES OF...
30 Rock, 8 p.m., NBC
American Idol, 8 p.m., Fox
Price This Place, SERIES PREMIERE, 8 p.m., HGTV
The Big Bang Theory, 8 p.m., CBS
This Old House Hour, 8 p.m., PBS
Wipeout, 8 p.m., ABC
¡Rob!, 8:30 p.m., CBS
Parks and Recreation, 8:30 p.m., NBC
Braxton Family Values, 9 p.m., WE
Grey's Anatomy, 9 p.m., ABC
Man, Woman, Wild, 9 p.m., Discovery
NY Ink, 9 p.m., TLC
Project Runway All-Stars, 9 p.m., Lifetime
Selling LA, 10 p.m., HGTV
Sins & Secrets, 9 p.m., Investigation Discovery
The Finder, 9 p.m., Fox
The First 48, 9 p.m., A&E;
Selling New York, 10:30 p.m., HGTV
Up All Night, 9:30 p.m., NBC
American Stuffers, 10 p.m., Animal Planet
Beyond Scared Straight, SEASON 2 FINALE, 10 p.m., A&E;
Jersey Shore, 10 p.m., MTV
Private Practice, 10 p.m., ABC
Stalked: Someone's Watching, 10 p.m., Investigation Discovery
The Firm, 10 p.m., NBC
The Mentalist, 10 p.m., CBS
When Girls Kill, ORIGINAL SPECIAL, 10 p.m., E!
Funny or Die's Billy on the Street, 11 p.m., Fuse
Elizabeth Banks on The Daily Show with Jon Stewart, 11 p.m., Comedy Central
Ewan McGregor on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon, 12:35 a.m., NBC
Gina Carano on Conan, 11 p.m., TBS
Kate Beckinsale on Chelsea Lately, 11 p.m., E!
Kathy Griffin on Late Show with David Letterman, 11:35 p.m., CBS
Ralph Fiennes and Holly Hunter on Watch What Happens: Live, 11 p.m., Bravo
Steven Wright on Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson, 12:37 a.m., CBS
Tom Arnold on Jimmy Kimmel Live, 12 a.m., ABC
Wanda Sykes on Tonight Show with Jay Leno, 11:35 p.m., NBC
What are you watching tonight?