What to watch on Tuesday, August 9.
Man, the week is racing by already! It's like a rocket ship with Speedy Gonzales mud flaps! Old men are running out into their front yards yelling, "SLOW DOWN, WEEK!" But I don't agree with them—you go just as fast as you want, week. Keep the TV shows coming.
MIDSEASON FINALE, 9pm, USA
So Matthew Bomer's going away for a little while, but fret not! You can always watch the trailer for In Time over and over! Anyway, in tonight's midseason finale, Neal and Mozzi try to keep the FBI's paws off their treasure cache. Erotic implications intended! (Huh?) Also P.S. Beau Bridges guest-stars.
9pm, ABC Family
Pretty Little Liars
Spencer and Emily decide to try and figure out what Jason's hiding, plus Aria battles her own attraction to him. And the lying! So much lying. Why can't these people just have a Pictionary night or something?
MIDSEASON FINALE, 10pm, USA
Annie and Danielle continue to rub each other the wrong way (erotic implications unintended) when Annie tries to help a Chinese scientist defect to the good ol' U.S. of A. (J/K they WERE intended!)
SERIES PREMIERE, 10 & 10:30pm, Investigation Discovery
Big Law: Deputy Butterbean
You liked him as an extremely white overweight boxer spouting elegantly belligerent one-liners, but you'll LOVE him as an extremely white overweight Sheriff's Deputy spouting elegantly belligerent one-liners. Tonight Deputy Eric "Butterbean" Esch joins his town's police force and goes after suspected meth cookers.
ORIGINAL SPECIAL, 9pm, TLC
Crazy About Pippa
By now most people agree that Prince William married the wrong sister, am I right? No? I'm not right? Anyway, Pippa Middleton still gets her own special here, but it's unclear how much time will be devoted to the subject of silly hats. Twenty minutes? Forty-five minutes? ALL of the minutes?
PLUS NEW EPISODES OF...
Hell's Kitchen, 8 p.m., Fox
It's Worth What?, 8 p.m., NBC
Wipeout, 8 p.m., ABC
America's Got Talent, 9 p.m., NBC
Degrassi: The Next Generation, 9 p.m., Teen Nick
Flipping Out, 9 p.m., Bravo
I Escaped: Real Prison Breaks, SEASON 2 PREMIERE, 9 & 9:30 p.m., Investigation Discovery
MasterChef, 9 p.m., Fox
Memphis Beat, 9 p.m., TNT
Take the Money & Run, 9 p.m., ABC
The Nine Lives of Chloe King, 9 p.m., ABC Family
Billy the Exterminator, 10 & 10:30 p.m., A&E;
Chopped, 10 p.m., Food Network
Combat Hospital, 10 p.m., ABC
HawthoRNe, 10 p.m., TNT
Teen Mom, 10 p.m., MTV
Top Shot, SEASON 3 PREMIERE, 10 p.m., History
Awkward., 11 p.m., MTV
Web Therapy, 11 p.m., Showtime
James Franco & Nick Swardson on Conan, 11 p.m., TBS
Jesse Eisenberg on Tonight Show with Jay Leno, 11:35 p.m., NBC
Jessica Alba on Jimmy Kimmel Live, 12 a.m., ABC
Katie Holmes on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon, 12:37 a.m., NBC
Rose McGowan on Chelsea Lately, 11 p.m., E!
Roseanne Barr on Lopez Tonight, 12 a.m., TBS
What are you watching tonight?