Colin Mochrie

Colin Mochrie


11/30/1957, Kilmarnock, Ayrshire, Scotland

Birth Name

Colin Andrew Mochrie


out of 10
User Rating
158 votes


Colin Andrew Mochrie was born Nov. 30, 1957, in Kilmarnock, Scotland. His father, an airline maintenance executive, moved the family to Montreal, Canada, in 1964 to Montreal and finally to Vancouver in 1969. When asked about his childhood, he said he tended to be a bit of a…more


Trivia and Quotes

  • Trivia

  • Quotes

    • Colin: Yep. Yeah. Although many people are because of the incredible beauty of what is happening behind me. It's so beautiful. Many artists have come down just to take a rendering of it. Oh my God, it... Oh, the beauty, the beauty!

    • Colin: Our top story tonight: Famous TV dolphin flipper was arrested today on prostitution ring charges. He allegedly was seen transporting two 16 year olds across state line for immoral porpoises.

    • Colin: I enjoy Wayne especially since he listened to my advice on how to sing a successful improv song.

    • Colin: I do enjoy working with Ryan although he owes me money.

    • Colin: Hi. There was a big accident, some people got decapitated, here are their names... You know what? That shirt really makes you look fat. I mean, the color's all wrong... I mean, who shot the drapes?

    • Colin: He fit the description of the man I was looking for... 6 foot five, four foot two naked. Well, when he was naked, he stood like this. I was going undercover. I was going to try to look like I needed a haircut.

    • Colin: Onstage I do all the stuff I'd never do in real life, like lashing out at people who make me mad or freaking out in a long bank lineup. Performing allows me to fulfill all the sicko fantasies I've ever had.

    • Colin: We all have a dinosaur deep within us just trying to get out.

    • Colin: And if that isn't the truth, it would be a lie.

    • Colin: E: there is no E. F: same as E.

    • Colin: General, we're under attack.

    • Colin: How will that work at night? Well Ryan will explain.

    • Colin: Is that a turkey?

    • Colin: What kind of FBI agent are you?

    • Colin: He was lying on the bunk like a tall giraffe being pulled down by a lion hungering...for a tall giraffe.

    • Colin: I'm a traveling practical joker. That's my line of work.

    • Colin: Yes, I guess I should have told you XXI years ago.

    • Colin: You know, if I don't make it when I go out there in that weather balloon into that thunder storm. I want, you to take your ear and give it to my wife.

    • Colin: I'm handsome, no ands, buts or ifs.

    • Colin: Many people think it's in bad taste to advertise for an insane asylum...but come on down. We're going crazy.

    • Colin: Every song a hit, every hit a smack!

    • Colin: This just in: Beverly Hills 90210, Cleveland Browns 3.

    • Colin: Balding Men Best Lovers In The World.

    • Colin: Hi, well soon return you to the dyslexic production of Bitty Bitty Chang Chang...

    • Colin: Hi. There was a big accident, some people got decapitated, here are their names... You know what? That shirt really makes you look fat. I mean, the color's all wrong... I mean, who shot the drapes?

    • Colin: When you kill someone by chopping off their head, rolling 'em up in a carpet and burning it, you'd better make sure they're dead!

    • Colin: He had the kind of face only a mother could love. If that mother was blind in one eye, and had that sort of milky film over the other one, ya..ya know, ya know what I mean? But still he was my identical twin.

    • Colin: Wake up and smell the cheese!

    • Colin: I have many favorite artists...Van Gogh as one, but he didn't really sing a lot!

    • Colin: My god! It's a hamster with explosives taped around it's waist!

    • Colin: My mother on her death bed told me, 'Where the hell did that kangaroo come from!?' - it just popped out of nowhere and punched her in the head and caused a cerebral hemorrhage, so I thought I'd move to a country where there were no kangaroos!

    • Colin: Do you think it's because I'm a cannibal?

    • Colin: Hey, come on, I've seen younger faces on money. Money.

    • Colin: I'm standing. I'm looking around. Perhaps there's something on the Crisis Monitor, here, I turned it on. Dry skin. Just thinking about it makes me want to scratch. Oh, that's air going into my lungs. Well, I hope my friends will get here soon to help me with this...Hey, here you come through the door.

    • Colin: Please call your second witness, and then call your mother, she worries.

    • Colin: Ladies and gentlemen of the jury. It's not like the sheep was underage.

    • Colin: You know, in the 1970's, when I was in high school, I belonged to a band called the Happy Funk Band. Until an unfortunate typo caused us to be expelled from school.

    • Colin: The Beatles, Rolling Stones, Barbra Streisand, Bruce Springsteen, these are just some of the people who threatened to sue if we used their songs.

    • Colin: We'll be back to our nature documentary, 'Baggy the Anorexic Elephant' in just a second.

    • Colin: Well, it seems all the fish in the rivers are dying. Could this be an act of cod?

    • Colin: My God, you're beautiful! Kiss me, kiss me like you've never kissed an anchor before!

    • Colin: Hey, Ryan, if Sting retires, will he change his name to Stung?

    • Colin: Get my brown pants!

    • Colin: Knowing Ryan has really helped my career. In fact, he's basically set up my entire life. I met my wife through him; I got Whose Line through him; I got the American Whose Line through him. He's done everything but sire my child.

    • Colin: There's many times this year I've sat back and thought, I'm making a living from making things up. It's the only skill I have so I've been really lucky.

    • Colin: Give me liberty or give me a bran muffin!

    • Colin: (In a Scottish accent) Sir, I don't want m' freedom!

    • Colin (asked what is the one project that he's always wanted to do, but has yet to be able to): I've always wanted to do an updated version of the Crosby-Hope Road movies but as yet haven't figured how to do that for today's audiences. Maybe that's a good thing.

    • Colin (asked who – or what – has had the biggest influence on his career): The people who influenced me most were the people who said I would never make it. They gave me a thirst for revenge.

    • Colin (asked if he could change one thing about the industry, what would it be): There are so many things I'd like to change in the industry. Everything from the reliance of style over substance to their reluctance to hire me for big budget blockbusters, but the thing I would love most would be if they understood people don't have to be Hollywood beautiful to be sexy or interesting.

    • Colin: (asked which project he feels didn't live up to what he envisioned) I am such a pessimist that every project has surpassed what I envisioned.

    • Colin: My most important professional accomplishment to date is the ability to keep working with absolutely no skills whatsoever.

    • Colin: As a kid I watched television 24 hours a day and loved every minute of it. The two shows that always make me laugh and are therefore my favourites are The Dick Van Dyke Show and Fawlty Towers.

    • Colin: When you're blowing in a chicken, be sure you're blowing in the right end.

    • Colin: Nine out of ten Americans believe that out of ten people, one person will always disagree with the other nine!

    • Colin: It all started with a badly timed bald joke!

    • Colin: Give me liberty or a bran muffin!

    • Colin: We want to be funny. We want to make people laugh, ... We'll do whatever it takes.

    • Colin: I think the challenge is going out in front of a paying audience with absolutely nothing and trying to entertain them for two hours, ... Thankfully, I only think about that right before we go on, and then once we're out there, everything's fine.

    • Colin: When I'm on stage, it's a little world I've created where I'm sort of the thing, so I have total control over everything that happens. When we're improvising, I'm with someone I totally trust. I know things are going to work out. I don't have those guarantees in life. ... There are no consequences on stage.

    • Colin: When I think about it, I mean really, I'm 47, I should be embarrassed by this. A grown man, barefoot, walking on mousetraps, just to get an audience to laugh. It's sad in a way.

    • Colin: I'm fine, Drew, I seem to have lost my battery pack somewhere in the area of my buttocks. It's okay, my pack is halfway up my ass...

    • Colin: I think actually that's all I heard when my parents would talk to me, was wah-wah-wah-wah-wah-wah.

    • Colin: I get email a lot, usually telling me how much they like Ryan Stiles. He's all right...what's the deal? You know, he's tall and he looks like a Don Martin cartoon if you really think about it.

    • Colin: We all have a dinosaur deep within us just trying to get out.

    • Colin: It's nice to be called 'overexposed' by Mike Bullard!

    • Colin: To be a dramatic writer takes hard work, talent, and discipline. And that's why I just make up crap.

    • Colin: I hope hockey fans can hear 'keep your stick on the ice' without weeping.

  • Words will never be enough to describe how great Colin is, but I'll still give it a shot.

    From shy valedictorian of his graduating class to best and funniest cast member of "Whose Line Is It Anyway?", Colin Mochrie is hysterical. It's not like that means he dumbed down or anything: his jokes are clever and his comebacks after something like a bald joke or being from Canada, were classic! The show would of survived lasting as long as 2010 and longer. Improv is very difficult since of course, everything is improvised! But, even though Colin said himself that Hoedowns and other song scenes weren't his strong suit, he always found a way to get through it, and with a great laugh from the audience! He deserves a show of his own, wherever he's at now.moreless
  • The greatest television improver ever.

    Yep, He's the funniest to ever do it. I can say that without a single shred of doubt. Say what you want. Yes, there isn't a huge field of mainstream TV improvers to choose from, but there are certainly enough to be able to crown a king among them. Yes, he might not have been THE funniest from the UK "Whose Line", but he was somewhere near the top. Yes, the producers of the American incarnation of "Whose Line" basically gave the show to him and Ryan to make it their own, but it definitely wasn't by accident. No, no accident. They knew full well that he was the one who could turn the show into something special. The chemistry between Colin and Ryan, coupled with Colin's insanely creative and bizarrely random brand of humor is what made "Whose Line" one of the funniest shows ever to grace the airwaves. And not only is Colin Mochrie easily the greatest improver ever to be on TV, he's also one of the downright funniest guys ever to be on TV period.moreless