John Hodgman

John Hodgman: (About the Mac-PC commercials) I was really curious as to why they [Apple] asked me to audition. My career as a magazine writer was largely prefaced on the idea of curiosity, to go on adventures and weasel my way into the lives of people that I admire. The process of auditioning for a commercial seemed like a process where I might learn something that I could write about. It did not occur to me that it might lead to the job. I got called back, and by the third time we talked, I thought, "You can't really be serious."

John Hodgman: (When asked if there was anything that he's not an expert on) Sports. I don't hate sports, I just have zero interest in them. I am amused by cricket because it seems to take longer than baseball and I like that. It seems like a sport I could have made up it - it takes several days to play and everyone wears sweaters. I can't confess to knowing what's going on at all. All I can ask from society is that it please stop telling me why I should like sports. People always try to explain that sports are about a sort of mythic combat, or [about] the narratives and the stories. You know what? I've got narratives and stories and I don't need sports.

John Hodgman: Here is the joke that is absolutely apt, though I once promised I would never make it: "I play one on TV, but I am not a PC." It is true. I am first of all: not a computer, but a human being; and second of all: a Mac user, almost exclusively, since 1984. There was a brief period in the wilderness between 1997 and 2003. Let us not speak of it.