Mike Birbiglia

Mike Birbiglia



Birth Name

Michael Birbiglia



Also Known As

Michael Birbiglia
out of 10
User Rating
6 votes


Mike Birbiglia, a graduate from Georgetown University who now resides in New York's Greenwich Village, has been writing since he could pick up a pencil. As a kid he wrote poems and mini-plays and drew pictures of bears and his family and the girls he liked at school.…more


Trivia and Quotes

  • Trivia

    • He went to Georgetown University, where, as a freshman, Mike was cast in the school's improv troupe and won "The Funniest Man on Campus" contest.

    • Was an alter boy growing up.

    • Was raised Catholic but later went through a brief phase of Atheism in high school.

    • Was discovered to have a tumor in his bladder at the age of nineteen. It was removed and didn't recur.

    • Nov. 11, 2005: Appeared as a guest on "Friday Night with Greg Giraldo" on Comedy Central. During the show, Mike did a segment called "Mike's College Tips".

    • Once hosted Comedy Central's "Friday Night Standup" lineup before Greg Giraldo was given the permanent hosting job. When Mike hosted, he did it in a bar from his old hometown.

    • Appeared in a series of Comedy Central promos sponsored by Twix in which he visited people at their workplaces.

    • After producing two very succesful comedy albums for Dane Cook, Comedy Central Records is now producing a CD for Mike Birbiglia. Material for the album will be recorded in Washington, DC between November 29 and December 4 (2005).

    • Mike's "Comedy Central Presents" special was so popular that the network is making another one which will tape in NYC this December (2005).

  • Quotes

    • Mike Birbiglia: I spent a lot of my spare time writing as a kid. I've always had a penchant for writing and have an active imagination.

    • Mike Birbiglia: I'm more confident off stage. I think a lot of comedians, and I'd say I fall into this category, onstage and off stage personas are quite similar. Onstage is a heightened version of the off stage.

    • Mike Birbiglia: I've never been in a rush to see big budget films. I'm not against them. It's just not something I go out of my way to do.

    • Mike Birbiglia: When I was a kid I would write songs, little plays, and poetry in school. If you're an adult and you're a poet, it's all about love and pain, but if you're a kid it's, "Does anyone know a word that rhymes with shark?"

    • Mike Birbiglia: Two Drink Mike enjoys dancing and knows a magic trick. Whereas, No Drink Mike enjoys biographies, and has serious opinions on wildlife. And Five Drink Mike...dances with wildlife...

    • Mike Birbiglia: You can't call me cracker. Only we can call each other crackers.

    • Mike Birbiglia: I performed for the U.S. troops in Guantanamo Bay. And signed autographs for people who've been gone from America for so long they didn't realize that I'm not famous.

    • Mike Birbiglia: I went to a funeral recently, and they handed out Kleenex before the funeral. Which I thought was cocky.

    • Mike Birbiglia: Sometimes when I do a joke and it doesn't get a lot of laughs, it kind of feels like I'm doing jazz. That's kinda cool because jazz is cool, but sometimes jazz sucks ... Maybe I'm the Kenny G of comedy.

    • Mike Birbiglia: I'm walking out my door to get like a Snapple, and someone's like 'yo man, you want to buy some heroin?' 'No... got any Snapple?'

    • Mike Birbiglia: I shouldn't say bad things about the illiterate, though..I should write it. That way they won't find out.

    • Mike Birbiglia: Some people come up to me and say "You know, in Italy, it's pronounced Ber-beel-lia" And I say "Well, here in America, you're annoying..."

    • Mike Birbiglia: My family isn't really Italian. We're more like Olive Garden Italian.

    • Mike Birbiglia: I read recently that women still make 30% less than men in the workplace. Which I think is fine, cause if we didn't make 30% more, you guys would marry each other.

    • Mike Birbiglia: I got an E-Trade account. Turns out I can turn $1,000 into $420 in less than a week. Sure, I had to pay some fees...

    • Mike Birbiglia: Someone stole my wallet last week. The guy called me up and he was mad at me. He was like 'you gotta get your finances together. You got no cash, your credit cards are maxed out. You don't even have minutes on your calling card. I had to use my card to call you.'

    • Mike Birbiglia: What I really need is a woman who loves me for my money but doesn't understand math.

    • Mike Birbiglia: A girl offered me E at the club. 'Have you ever done E?' 'I watch E.'

    • Mike Birbiglia: Everyone tries to get you to dance at clubs. They come up to you and say "You gotta dance! you gotta dance!" And then I dance, and they're like, "Not like that!"