Noel Coward

Noel: The day when I shall begin to worry is when the critics declare: 'This is Noël Coward's greatest play.' But I know they bloody well won't.

Noel: Certain women should be struck regularly, like gongs.

Noel: My life really has been one long extravaganza.

Noel: I can accept anything in the theatre provided it amuses me or moves me. But if it does neither, I want to go home.

Noel: My importance to the world is relatively small. On the other hand, my importance to myself is tremendous. I am all I have to work with, to play with, to suffer and to enjoy. It is not the eyes of others that I am wary of, but of my own. I do not intend to let myself down more than I can possibly help, and I find that the fewer illusions I have about myself or the world around me, the better company I am for myself.

Noel: Everybody worships me, it's nauseating.

Noel: I don't much care for Hollywood, I'd rather have a nice cup of cocoa.

Noel: Wit is like caviar - it should be served in small portions and not spread about like marmalade.

Noel: People are wrong when they say opera is not what it used to be. It is what it used to be. That is what's wrong with it.

Noel: The Beatles have all four been awarded MB's, which has caused a considerable outcry. Furious war heroes are sending back their bravely-won medals by the bushel.