Rosie O'Donnell

Rosie: (On her time at The View) It started out as a tea party and wound up like a women's prison movie. There were shivs out on the table.

Rosie: Lindsay [Lohan]'s behavior on her latest film Georgia Rule was unacceptable. It's not like she was doing Dumb & Dumber 2. It's a Jane Fonda movie! Be early! I saw Lohan stumbling around a club drunk once and her mother was going, 'She's all right!' I can say this from experience: it's hard to be famous, and she's not doing it well at this point. But she'll get into rehab, take care of the eating disorder, and be all better in two years and have a huge comeback.

Rosie (on Danny Noriega): I don't know if you have to sit around the American Idol studio and look sad for the next few weeks -- because I think that's part of the contract, you got a free cruise. You and a friend. Come on there, and I want you to sing Tainted Love. I think you're fantastic. And I think you're a bold and brave and beautiful young man. And I admire you, Danny Noriega. You have an amazing voice.

Rosie: Every parent has to go through this in America. We can't get our 10-year-old to behave at school.

Rosie: I think I'm still growing up. To me, the ultimate act of recovery is being able to give my children the life I never had. To be able to have a child who is safe and held and told, 'I love you.' That's my greatest success story.

Rosie: I'm getting closer to the age when my mother died. I used to think it was my destiny to follow in her footsteps, that there was some time bomb ticking inside of me. But the introduction of children in my life has given me a will and a knowledge that I'll be around for them.

Rosie: It's not really a choice I make; it's how I live my life, the things I do when I mess up. Like the time I cut my daughter's finger when I was trimming her nails, it was the worst moment of my life, and I almost didn't talk about it on the air because I felt such shame. But when I did, the letters and calls we got! Thousands saying, 'I did the same thing.' That's the humanity people respond to, the normalcy, and it's harder when you become rich and famous, especially hard if you do comedy.

Rosie: I think I'm very relatable. When I did standup in little clubs in Oklahoma or Arizona, people would come up and say, 'Rosie you're just like my friend, Eileen Murphy' or 'Dorrie McShane,' always the Irish name. Everybody had a sister or best friend like me, and that same non-threatening feeling goes into the show because a lot of women are competitive and our show is more of a celebration.

Rosie: I'm crafty in a gay sort of way.

Was it fun to film the sex scene with Julian on Nip/Tuck? Rosie: I had on this tube top-type thing, and these shorts, and they drape me so I am not embarrassed. And he comes in and all he has on is a sock covering his penis. His is totally naked and he says, "Are you Ready?". I didn't remember doing this but apparently I said, Oh my God! You look like Superman.

Rosie: I was told that 68% of the people said that they thought I was going to be boxxy. regarding her joining the View

Rosie: People ask me why I thought my show was so successful. Free crap.

Rosie: I love Elisabeth, it's this witch (Joy Behar) that I can't stand.

Rosie: Save some for therapy.

Rosie (on sharing the limelight on 'The View'): It will be hard for me to not be the boss, it is already and we have only just begun. I'm used to being the star and now I'm part of an ensemble.