Woody Allen

Woody Allen


12/1/1935, The Bronx, New York City, New York, USA

Birth Name

Allan Stewart Konigsberg



Also Known As

Woodie Allen
out of 10
User Rating
36 votes



Woody Allen was born on December 1, 1935, as Allen Stewart Konigsberg, in Brooklyn, New York City, New York. At the age of 15, he started selling one-liners to gossip columns. After working a while as a stand up comedian, he was hired to write What's New, Pussycat.…more


Trivia and Quotes

  • Trivia

  • Quotes

    • Woody Allen: Of course, I would love everybody to see my films. But I don't care enough ever to do anything about it. I would never change a word or make a movie that I thought they would like. I really don't care if they come or not. If they don't want to come, then they don't; if they do come, then great. Do I want to do what I do uncompromisingly, and would I love it if a big audience came? Yes, that would be very nice. I've never done anything to attract an audience, though I always get accused of it over the years.

    • Woody Allen: I know it sounds horrible, but winning that Oscar for Annie Hall didn't mean anything to me.

    • Woody Allen: They're political and bought and negotiated for - although many worthy people have deservedly won - and the whole concept of awards is silly. I cannot abide by the judgment of other people, because if you accept it when they say you deserve an award, then you have to accept it when they say you don't.

    • Woody Allen: If it turns out that there is a God, I don't think that he's evil. But the worst that you can say about him is that basically he's an underachiever.

    • Woody Allen: The biggest flaw in being self-taught is there are gaps. You self-teach yourself something and you think you know something fairly well, but then there are gaps a university teacher would have taught you as part of a mandatory program. I would probably have been better off if I'd got a better general education, but I was just so bored.

    • Woody Allen: Human beings are divided into mind and body. The mind embraces all the nobler aspirations, like poetry and philosophy, but the body has all the fun.

    • Woody Allen: I was thrown out of NYU (New York University) for cheating on my Metaphysics final. I looked within the soul of the boy sitting next to me.

    • Woody Allen: For me, being famous didn't help me that much. It helped a little. Warren Beatty once said to me many years ago, being a star is like being in a whorehouse with a credit card, and I never found that. For me, it was like being in a whorehouse with a credit card that had expired.

    • Woody Allen: I think there is too much wrong with the world to ever get too relaxed and happy. The more natural state, and the better one, I think, is one of some anxiety and tension over man's plight in this mysterious universe.

    • Woody Allen: I wasn't away. And I'm not back. "Match Point" was a film about luck, and it was a very lucky film for me. I did it the way I do all my pictures, and it just worked. I needed a rainy day, I got a rainy day. I needed sun, I got sun. Kate Winslet dropped out at the last moment because she wanted to be with her family, and Scarlett Johansson was available on two days' notice. It's like I couldn't ruin this picture no matter how hard I tried.

    • Woody Allen: Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering - and it's all over much too soon.

    • Woody Allen: It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones slept better... while the bad ones seemed to enjoy the waking hours much more.

    • Woody Allen: It is impossible to travel faster than the speed of light, and certainly not desirable, as one's hat keeps blowing off.

    • Woody Allen: It is impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune.

    • Woody Allen: Life is divided into the horrible and the miserable.

    • Woody Allen: Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.

    • Woody Allen: My one regret in life is that I am not someone else.

    • Woody Allen: On the plus side, death is one of the few things that can be done just as easily lying down.

    • Woody Allen: Organized crime in America takes in over forty billion dollars a year and spends very little on office supplies.

    • Woody Allen: Students achieving Oneness will move on to Twoness.

    • Woody Allen: The government is unresponsive to the needs of the little man. Under 5'7", it is impossible to get your congressman on the phone.

    • Woody Allen: Interestingly, according to modern astronomers, space is finite. This is a very comforting thought--particularly for people who can never remember where they have left things.

    • Woody Allen: If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name in a Swiss bank.

    • Woody Allen: I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way around Chinatown.

    • Woody Allen: I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me.

    • Woody Allen: I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.

    • Woody Allen: I am at two with nature.

    • Woody Allen: Eighty percent of success is showing up.

    • Woody Allen: There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?

    • Woody Allen: Thought: Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only food: frequently there must be a beverage.

    • Woody Allen: What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet.

    • Woody Allen: When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.

    • Woody Allen: Why are our days numbered and not, say, lettered?

    • Woody Allen: You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to live to be a hundred.

    • Woody Allen: It's not that I'm afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it happens.

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    While Woody Allen's acting skills leave something to be desired, his writing and directing skills are astonishing. He is one of the most prolific comedy writers in the history of film. His most recent piece, "Match Point," was a great film.
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    He is a comedy genius. I have seen some of his movies and some of his plays, and they were awesome. I laugh so much whenever he is there, because he is such a good writer that has a lot of prestige. I really think that Woody Allen is in top of the comedy writer mountain, because he is such a good writer. He is awesome.