Cast: Although listed in the opening credits, regular cast members Scott Adsit (Pete), Judah Friedlander (Frank), and Keith Powell (Toofer) do not appear in this episode.
Liz: (On the phone with Bev her adoption counsellor) Four years, so I'll be 46 by the time I get a baby.
Bev: Unless you'd like to adopt an older child. I can give you a six year old yesterday. Pick a colour!
Liz: Oh, I just always pictured myself getting a newborn.
Bev: And I always pictured myself getting double-teamed by two The Rocks. But sometimes we have to make compromises.
Liz: Have you ever updated your Flash Player? It is so sad (Crying). What happens to version 11.4.
Jack: Oh what now?!
Liz: (Angry) I'm taking hormone shots to have a baby you son of a bitch. A beautiful little baby (Crying). Laughs Being a woman is the worst!
Dr. Spaceman: Carol, they're towing your car!
Fertility Specialist: Dammit! My kids are in there. (Leaves to check on car)
Liz: No! How! I came all the way to Westchester just to avoid you.
Dr. Spaceman: This is Westchester? I'm lost!
Tracy Jordan: (Walks into Liz's office while she is holding a hormone syringe.) Are you doping? Liz Lemon, that stuff is shrinking testicles, but there are bad side effects as well.
Liz Lemon: No, Tracy. Not that it's any of your business, but I'm starting fertility treatments.
Tracy Jordan: Now I'm not a woman so of course I can say whatever I want. This seems really weird and unnatural. Side effects include mood swings, increased irritability and swelling of one or more boobs.
Liz Lemon: Can I help you with something?
Tracy Jordan: Yeah, I'm about to start shooting my new Harriet Tubman movie and I got Octavia Spencer to play the lead, Harriet something.
Liz Lemon: You know, I once played Frederick Douglass in a one woman show that the University of Maryland Diamondback called too confusing to be offensive.
Tracy Jordan: Point is, I won't be at rehearsal at all this week.
Liz Lemon: No, Tracy.
Tracy Jordan: Exactly! No Tracy. Thanks for being so understanding.