3rd Rock from the Sun

Sally: I'll give you your promotion if you don't say the word "really" in the next sixty seconds. Harry: Really? Sally: You lose!

Dick: So, no matter how obnoxious you are, how much of a burden you become, you can still count on the forgiveness of your family? Mary: Yeah. Dick: Even if they touch your radio and refuse to make smoked chub and disobey your orders not to kill? Mary: Yeah, even then. Dick: That is so beautiful.

(Dick comes to stop Harry and Sally from killing Roy) Sally: Dick! What a pleasant surprise. You'll know this one. Is that the big dipper or is- (Sally gets cut off by Dick) Dick: Don't try to kiss up. Your ass is grass.

(Mary's brother Roy is telling the Solomons about the time he was kidnapped by aliens) Mary: (sarcastically) Yeah Right. Aliens traveled billions of light years through space to ram a probe up Roy Albright's butt.

Dick: All we seem to do is argue, ever since we came here. Sally: I don't want to talk about it Dick: We've studied nine galaxies in perfect harmony. Harry: And we didn't leave scuff marks. (He is referring to the ground that he just waxed) Dick: We seem to be annoyed with each other, and as fascinating as that is, it's irritating as hell. Sally? Sally: I'm sorry. I wasn't listening. I just got a shooting pain in my head when you began to speak.