3rd Rock from the Sun

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NBC (ended 2001)

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  • Season 6
    • Ep 20
      The Thing That Wouldn't Die, Part 2
      1/20/08
      8.5
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    • Ep 19
      The Thing That Wouldn't Die (1)
      5/22/01
      8.8
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      Mary is having some trouble dealing with what she saw: Dick transforming Scoochie into a monkey. Dick inevitably tells her the truth and she has a hard time to believe in it. Eventually she accepts it and even becomes fascinated by it. When everything seems to be going fine for Dick, Harry announces that their mission is over and they are to leave Earth.moreless
    • Ep 18
      Mary Loves Scoochie (2)
      5/15/01
      8.7
      Dick can't stop Mary from dating her secret admirer "Scoochie" (really alien Liam Neesam), even though he suspects Liam is only using her as part of his plot against all mankind. Meanwhile, the rest of the gang find the "prequel" to their favorite movie, Arthur 2.
    • Ep 18
      Mary Loves Schoochie, Part 2
      5/8/01
      0.0
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    • Ep 17
      Mary Loves Scoochie (1)
      5/8/01
      8.6
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      John Cleese reprises his role as Liam Neesam, Dick's malevolent alien nemesis in the first of a special two-part episode. In part one, Dick intercepts love letters sent to Mary by "Scoochie," a secret admirer, and plots to interject himself into Mary's upcoming assignation at a Renaissance festival with the mystery man.moreless
    • Ep 16
      Dick Soup for the Soul
      5/1/01
      8.6
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      Dick thinks he's found the key to true happiness after reading Mary's favorite self-help book, so he rids himself of all conflict in his life -- including Mary, his main source of friction. Sally tries to help Tommy get into his college fraternity of choice by posing as the Assistant Pledge Master during Hell Week, but her grueling physical tests push Tommy to the limit. Meanwhile, Harry becomes tortured in his quest to re-paint the kitchen ceiling.moreless
    • Ep 15
      Glengarry Glen Dick
      4/17/01
      8.9
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      After Dick and Don each buy half of a timeshare "luxury getaway," they take Mary and Sally on their first vacation there. Meanwhile, Harry's afraid of shrinking now that Tommy's taller than he is.
    • Ep 14
      My Mother, My Dick
      2/20/01
      8.3
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      When a new alien accidentally arrives through the time space portal, Dick tells Harry and Sally that it's their responsibility to take care of him. And Dick alienates Mary by taking sides with her detested mother as he tries to navigate through the minefield that separates the two women.
    • Ep 13
      You Don't Know Dick
      2/13/01
      8.5
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      After everyone convinces Dick that he doesn't know what Mary likes, he tries to buy concert tickets for the two of them.
    • Ep 12
      Dick's Ark
      2/6/01
      8.8
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      Dick gets a new camera and proceeds to make Mary angry by taking her picture against her wishes. Mary decides the two need a weekend off. ''''Sally catches Harry walking around in the rain in her new suede jacket and decides that since the weather men can't accurately predict the rain they should pay for it. Upon going to the studio she then gets hired to be "Sally Storm" the new weather girl. Sally is told by Dick to stop being the weather girl after constantly being accurate, at which point they see that a major tornado will hit their area.''''Dick then remembers the college has a bomb shelter and proceeds to allow Sally and Harry to both bring one loved one to save from the carnage. Dick has to then try and get Mary to come, and does this by making Nina thing that an intervention(AA style) is in order.moreless
    • Ep 11
      A Dick Replacement
      1/30/01
      9.0
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      Dick and Mary visit Rita, a psychic, together, and Dick scoffs that the whole thing's a rip-offuntil the psychic says that Dick and Mary are from two different worlds. She adds that one of these days Dick will leave Mary and go back where he came from. Dick immediately decides that he should devote himself to locating his successor, someone worthy who will wait in the wings until Dick has gone. Later, Sally tells Harry that if the psychic talked about Dick's leaving the planet, she must know they're aliens; they have to kill her. ''''Dick takes Mary to a singles bar in search of the perfect replacement, but he acts so strangely that the bartender thinks Mary's a hooker and asks them to leave. Harry and Sally set about hatching wildly unrealistic plots designed to do away with the psychic. Nina tells Dick about Gary Hemmings, a visiting lecturer who's dying to substitute for him. Dick talks with Gary and offers him the chance to replace him; Gary thinks he's being offered a staff position at the University. Gary's a bit puzzled when Dick insists that he meet Mary, saying that if Mary doesn't like him it will never work. ''''Harry and Sally visit the psychic. Harry gets her in a headlock and smears honey on her blouse. Unfortunately, he's forgotten to tell Sally that his plan involves killer bees, so she can't supply them at the crucial moment. ''''Dick, Gary and Mary meet in a restaurant, and Dick embarrasses and puzzles Mary as he attempts to play matchmaker. Harry and Sally re-visit Rita, who wants to throw them out, but they manage to get her to talk about herself, and she confides that she's always pictured herself dying during a passionate night of lovemaking. Harry's not sure he's up to doing the job, and Dick shows up and says he needs to speak to Rita first. He wonders how much time he has left; Harry tells Dick that however much time he has from now on, he's just a temp. Dick tells Gary he has the job and will probably be in the sack with Mary that evening. Gary protests that he won't sleep with Mary to get the job, and Dick says that sleeping with Mary is the job. In that case, Gary, who only wants a chance to teach physics, is having no part of it. When Mary finds out what's been going on, she's afraid that Dick might be dying, but he explains that he was just spooked by what the psychic had to say, and now he's decided he doesn't want to be replaced.moreless
    • Ep 10
      There Is No Business Like Dick Business
      1/16/01
      7.0
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    • Ep 9
      Dick Digs
      1/9/01
      8.7
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      When Mary invites Dick to accompany her on an archeological dig, he eagerly accepts; he's seen "Raiders of the Lost Ark," so he knows how exciting and dangerous archeology can be. The Rutherford Garlic Festival is underway, and hotel rooms are at a premium. Since Dick's gone on the dig, the other aliens decide to rent out his bed. Soon the Solomons' apartment becomes "The Inn at Solomon House" with Tommy and Sally committed to giving their guests outstanding service in hopes of earning four stars in the Crown Travel Guide. Harry's not enthusiastic about the new venture, because he gets to do all the dirty work. ''At the dig, Dick's disenchanted when Mary gives him a trowel, a brush and an air bulb and tells him to carefully dust the sediment in one square foot of land. Dick grudgingly gets to work and later complains that he's been working five hours and all he's found is a pointy rock. Mary's astonished when she identifies his "pointy rock" as a spear head. She sadly confesses that she's been going on digs for years and has never found anything. She's had to buy the artifacts in her office and has even gotten some from eBay. She says she would have killed to have found the ceremonial wedding moon that Dr. Powell, the leader of the dig, uncovered earlier. Dick tells her not to worry; he's sure she'll find something. ''Harry's fed up with his new job and resigns; he shows up shortly afterward and wants to register as a hotel guest. If he can't be a guest, he'll write a negative letter to the Crown Travel Guide, so Sally and Tommy reluctantly allow him to register. Harry immediately becomes guest from hell, demanding constant massages and tickets to "Les Mis." ''Back at the dig, Mary sees little point in continuing, because she's sure she won't find anything, but Dick insists she go on. He slyly plants something where she's been digging, and soon she unearths a wedding moon identical to the one found by Dr. Powell. She's ecstatic until it's revealed that, in fact, it is Dr. Powell's, and she's accused of being a thief. She's furious with Dick, but he assures her he was only trying to make her feel better. ''Sally can't bear another minute of waiting on Harry hand and foot, so she announces that she too is quitting and will be registering as a guest. Tommy says nothing doing. He's sick of the whole thing. Together the aliens order their unsuspecting hotel guests out of their house.moreless
    • Ep 8
      Red, White & Dick
      12/19/00
      9.2
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      Dick realizes he needs to become more American, only to hear he actually has a Canadian passport. Sally, Harry and Tommy start an equality system in the house, only for it to end up as a communist regime.
    • Ep 7
      B.D.O.C.
      12/12/00
      8.7
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      The aliens give Tommy a big send-off to college, including two cases of beer and a fake ID, but as he's leaving Sally and Harry get ready to interview his replacement. ''''The candidates have materialized in the closet and are ready and waiting. Both aliens are sold on Christie, an extremely efficient young woman, until they meet the incredibly handsome Bryce. Sally's bowled over by Bryce and hires him on the spot. Harry's upset, but he's quickly overruled. Meanwhile, Dick drops Tommy off at his dorm, and they reminisce about all the missions they've been on together. ''''Sally's loving every minute that Bryce is around, but after Bryce's first day on the job, Dick decides to go get Tommy and bring him back. Tommy's already enjoying college and flirting with girls. Dick arrives and tries to convince Tommy to come home and go to Pendleton if he must go to college, but Tommy says he's not leaving. He does manage to convince Tommy that to impress the girls and really make a name for himself he has to come up with an outrageous freshman prank. Dick convinces him to literally turn the chancellor's office upside down, nailing everything from the filing cabinet to the ficus tree to the ceiling. Dick pulls the fire alarm as a final touch and locks Tommy in the office. At last it hits Tommy that Dick's trying to get him expelled. ''''Back at the apartment, Sally has given up trying to be subtle and is openly hitting on Bryce, who's very uncomfortable. Dick's disappointed when the Chancellor merely issues Tommy a warning for his offense, telling Dick he doesn't want to stifle youthful exuberance and reminiscing fondly about a few of his own college pranks. He even suggests that Tommy might like to meet his daughter. ''''Harry and Bryce confront Sally with the charge of sexual harassment in the workplace. Sally pretends that she's sorry and offers to resign; she heads toward the closet, but at the last second she shoves Bryce in. ''''That evening Dick goes to see Tommy in his dorm room and tells him he's making a big mistake, but Tommy refuses to come home. Dick has to confess that he didn't want Tommy to grow up; Tommy replies that parental love, at its best, is the only love that leads to separation, and Dick realizes that it's time for him to go. ''''The Solomons, without Tommy, are on the roof. Sally and Harry tell Dick that Bryce is gone; he didn't work out. Dick is saying how funny it seems without Tommy just as Tommy is coming up the back steps with a laundry basket. Since school is only an hour away, he thought he'd do his laundry at home.moreless
    • Ep 6
      Why Dickie Can't Teach
      12/5/00
      8.5
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      Tommy can't decide where to go to college, and Dick is really pushing Pendleton: when it's all said and done, Princeton and Pendleton both serve fish sticks. Dick says he'll give Tommy a personal tour of the campus. Harry wants to go too but the other aliens remind him that he's not going to college. ''''Meanwhile, Sally's upset that Don's not included in a newspaper article on Rutherford's ten most powerful men; she can't fathom how this is possible. Sally says maybe she's let Don down; maybe she hasn't thrust greatness upon him. It's time to rebuild him into the powerhouse he's never dreamed of being. ''''On campus, Mary tries to help Dick recruit Tommy, but Tommy just wants to sit in on a class. Sally decides to throw a power brunch to turn Don into a success; she invites everyone on the top ten list plus other important townspeople. At the brunch, she wangles an assistant's job for Don with Gus DeMarmel, president of DeMarmel lunchmeat; never mind that Don has absolutely no business experience. Since Don already has a job, Sally tells him to take the night shift and be an assistant during the day shift. ''''After sitting in on only one of Dick's classes, Tommy tells him that he's a terrible teacher, much worse than Tommy imagined. Don starts his assistant's job, and Sally couldn't be more proud. Insulted by Tommy's remarks, Dick says he's forbidden to go to Pendleton. Tommy's delighted, so Dick then informs him that he will, in fact, be going there. Tommy asks Dick what his problem is. Dick's so bad at teaching that Tommy thought he knew. Don is crazed at work when Harry and Sally show up, and he has no time for them. Tommy talks with Mary, and she confesses she feels guilty about trying to recruit him, because Pendleton's a clown college. Harry convinces Sally that Don is blowing her and is now in search of a trophy wife. Sally says she made Don, now she can break him. ''''When Dick proves unsuccessful at teaching some kids to play hopscotch, even Mary agrees that he's a bad teacher. Sally sabotages a project Don's working on, and he gets fired. And when Dick tells Tommy he plans to quit teaching, Tommy reminds him that no matter how good or bad a teacher he is, his real job is to be high commander.moreless
    • Ep 5
      Dick'll Take Manhattan (2)
      11/28/00
      9.1
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      Things aren't going well in the Solomons' parallel universe and they want to go home.
    • Ep 4
      Dick'll Take Manhattan (1)
      11/21/00
      8.8
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      Dick, Sally and Harry are bored so they go to another dimension (through their shower) where they are all very rich famous and living in New York.
    • Ep 3
      Indickscretion
      11/14/00
      9.0
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      Dick invites Sally and Don to join himself and Mary on a date. But when the conversation turns to their sex lives, Don and Mary have adverse reactions. Meanwhile, Dick and Harry take a road trip, but only get as far as the gas station.
    • Ep 2
      Fear and Loathing in Rutherford
      10/31/00
      9.2
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      In an attempt to reconcile with Alissa, Tommy goes to her house with the feeble excuse that she still has the beer tap they rented for the senior party and he needs to return it. Strudwick snidely tells Tommy that he thought Alissa had given him his walking papers. But Alissa surprises her father by leaving the house with Tommy carrying a suitcase (containing the beer tap). A few hours later Strudwick goes to the Solomons' apartment looking for Alissa. Mrs. Dubcek observes that the evidence points to an elopement. Dick and Strudwick enlist Mary's help and drive off to stop the wedding.moreless
    • Ep 1
      Les Liaisons Dickgereuses
      10/24/00
      8.8
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      Mary's rich, spoiled sister Renata arrives in Rutherford. Dick formulates a plan to help Mary get the best of her once and for all. But Dick's falls in temptation when he gets a chance to live a life of luxury.
  • Season 5
  • Season 4
    • Ep 24
      The Big Giant Headache, Part 2
      5/25/99
      0.0
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    • Ep 24
      Dick's Big Giant Headache (2)
      5/25/99
      9.5
      Reeling in the aftermath of his demotion, Dick has to get used to taking orders from everyone else in the crew -- even Harry -- a humiliating experience that makes it difficult for him to perform sexually. Even though she didn't want to believe the family's taunts about the reasons for her promotion, Sally finally realizes Stone only made her High Commander because of her looks. Stone makes a pass at Albright, who declines and tells Dick, who's psyched that Stone's changed his mind about Mary. Stone goes to the prom with Tommy and Alissa, where a drunken Stone dumps a punchbowl over Alissa's head, then serenades the promgoers -- including a bedazzled Vicki, who decided it was finally time to attend her junior prom -- with "Close To You." In the high school hallway, Stone encounters Vicki and "beams" her up to his "bachelor pod" for some lovin'. The next morning, Vicki turns up pregnant, and her pregnancy develops to full term in a matter of moments. Stone, who had been planning to make Earth his base of operations, gets the uncontrollable urge to flee once he learns of Vicki's pregnancy, leaving Sally in charge. The Solomons and Albright rush Vicki to the hospital, where the nurse proclaims, "I can see the head. Boy, is that a big head..."moreless
    • Ep 23
      The Big Giant Headache, Part 1
      5/25/99
      0.0
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    • Ep 23
      Dick's Big Giant Headache (1)
      5/25/99
      9.4
      The Big Giant Head announces his plans to visit the Solomons in person to chastise them for their poor mission performance. Dick tells Sally to move back in, orders Harry to stop trying to father a baby with Vicki, and tries to prepare Mary for the arrival of his old "college chum," worrying privately that the supreme leader might not find her to have been a suitable use of his time. The family goes to the airport to meet the Big Giant Head (William Shatner), a drunken good-time charlie who's taken the name of "Stone Phillips," and who, in short order, moves in and takes over their lives. Dick quickly loses favor with Stone, who's unimpressed both by his choice of girlfriend and his leadership skills. Stone is, however, quite taken by everything about Sally, especially the length of her legs and the shape of her torso, and decides to make her the High Commander instead of Dick. Meanwhile, Harry keeps trying to avoid Vicki, but eventually he tells her that they need to cool the baby thing for a while, and she runs away from him in tears. Also, although he's initially unenthusiastic, Tommy plans to attend the junior prom because it's so important to Alissa. Vicki is sad to hear all the prom talk -- she never got to go to hers, and she's felt the lack ever since.moreless
    • Ep 22
      Near Dick Experience
      5/18/99
      9.1
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      When Sally, Harry, and Tommy narrowly miss being crushed by a chandelier at a restaurant, their near-death experience fills them with a new reverence for life -- and fills Dick with jealousy that he wasn't able to share this deep experience. The newly enlightened trio volunteers at a soup kitchen for the homeless, and Dick signs up for a wilderness hiking trip with Mary, hoping like the dickens that he'll lose his footing and find serenity via a near-death experience of his own. While Dick is trying desperately to have his own near-miss with death, the others learn that their new appreciation for every leaf, every bird, and every fellow man is fading rapidly with the passage of every hour. Sally, Tommy, and Harry have just about returned to being their blas, uncaring selves just as Dick joins them on the roof, bursting with news about how he's just managed to escape death's clutches in a car accident. Now Dick's found a new love for life, but he's still the odd man out.moreless
    • Ep 21
      Dick vs. Strudwick
      5/11/99
      9.1
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      Dick's faculty nemesis, Dr. Vincent Strudwick, writes a physics book that's hailed as a work of genius. When Dick realizes that writing a better book would expose him as a superior alien being, he seeks another means of getting even, finally seizing on Strudwick's displeasure at learning that his teenage daughter Alissa is dating dreaded Solomon spawn Tommy. Dick manipulates Alissa to cause trouble between her and her father, and the conflict comes to a head at the taping of a TV panel show about Strudwick's book, which erupts into Jerry Springer-style fisticuffs. Meanwhile, Sally and Don, feeling "lonely" since their breakup, find themselves succumbing to "ex sex." Also, once Albright befriends a group of misfit Nobel laureates who are in town to hail the publication of Strudwick's book, she can't shake them -- they've imprinted on her like a litter of helpless kittens.moreless
    • Ep 20
      Alien Hunter
      5/4/99
      9.2
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      A mysterious woman, Charlotte, turns up in Dick's life, claiming first to be auditing his class, then to be writing an article about him, then to be an "intellectual groupie." She charms Sally, Tommy, and Harry, who are happy to oblige when she offers to help plan the surprise birthday party that Dick has demanded they throw him. Dick is too busy having his ego stroked, and the family is too busy being grateful for her help, to wonder what Charlotte's real story is -- which they regret when they learn she's an alien hunter, come to dissect Dick's brain with the help of her hulking son, Ned. Although Charlotte's called all the invitees to tell them the party's canceled, they begin showing up anyway, interrupting the skull-cutting process. Ned ties them all up in Mrs. Dubcek's basement. Sally, Harry, Tommy, Don, and the others run upstairs just as the FBI arrives to capture Charlotte, a well-known crackpot who has mistakenly thought any number of innocent citizens to be aliens. The Solomons remain unharmed and undetected... for now.moreless
    • Ep 19
      Citizen Solomon
      4/29/99
      9.1
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      Now that Sally's moved out and won't clean for them anymore, the male Solomons decide that it's time to get a maid. They hire Mary's cleaning woman, Cathy, an inscrutable woman who makes their place sparkle. Overwhelmed by the results, the Solomons begin thinking of Cathy less as help and more as a treasured family member -- despite the fact that Cathy gives them no encouragement to do so. Meanwhile, Sally, jealous of the guys' affection for Cathy, decides that she'll turn the tables -- if Cathy can "steal" Sally's family, Sally can steal Cathy's. Finally, Cathy, tired of the Solomons' intrusion into her private life, quits. Also, Tommy joins the staff of the school paper and is made editor, displaying a penchant for unearthing scandals both real and imagined. Busy with his new duties, Tommy assigns ex-girlfriend August to review Alissa in "My Fair Lady." August's review is unflattering but honest, and Tommy, true to his journalistic ideals, decides to run it. When confronted by a tearful Alissa, however, Tommy buckles, shifting blame to his "biased" ex-girlfriend's desire to destroy his happiness.moreless
    • Ep 18
      Dick the Mouth Solomon
      4/6/99
      8.7
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      Sally meets a suave Italian-American man at a restaurant. He woos her, and when she learns he goes by the name of Sammy "The Butcher" Marchetti, she and Tommy are thrilled because they assume he's a mobster. Sammy asks Tommy to run errands for him, and Tommy's excited to be working as -- he assumes -- a bag man for the Mob. When Sally and Tommy learn that Sam's not actually a Mafioso but a real butcher, his appeal fades, and they both lose interest in him. Mary, concerned that she and Dick need to work on their communication skills, convinces him to go to a couples retreat. To her dismay, her good intentions get turned around as everyone there -- including Harry and Vicki, the poster children for public displays of affection -- embraces Dick for his openness, and criticizes Mary for her emotional unavailability.moreless
    • Ep 17
      Y2dicK
      3/16/99
      9.1
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      Dick, who's never figured out computers, decides it's time to get plugged in. He discovers e-mail and the internet, and withdraws completely from the physical world, relying on take-out food, chat rooms, and live video feeds, and shutting out people, fresh air, and sunlight. When Mary tries to drag him away, he knocks over a Big Gulp cup, shorting out his system. Venturing outside to find the fuse box, Dick realizes that his computer wasn't keeping him connected to the world -- it was keeping him separated. Sally and Tommy go to buy a new TV set, but the more they learn about the available technology, the less satisfied they are with each purchase they make, until they've upgraded themselves into near-bankruptcy. Sadder but wiser, they return their expensive audiovisual equipment to the store. Also, Harry's all for trying to have a baby with Vicki, until the whole medical-science part of it makes it impossible for him to get in the mood. He tells Vicki it's the natural way or no way, and, turned on by his primal-ness, she agrees.moreless
    • Ep 16
      Superstitious Dick
      3/2/99
      9.2
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      Dick receives a chain letter, but hesitates to discard it when he sees all of the ill fortune that befalls Mary after she scoffs and tosses hers out. When Dick does throw his away, he worries that he won't receive the prestigious physics grant he's applied for, and becomes obsessed with oddball charms and superstitious behaviors he thinks will bring him luck. What he doesn't realize until too late is that his weird behavior itself has caused him to lose the grant. Sally discovers the wonders of the Hardware Stop Superstore with the help of hunky and extremely competent employee Justin, and begins concocting problems just to spend time with him. Harry, whose orange shirt looks exactly like the Hardware Stop uniform, is baffled when other customers keep asking him to help them make keys, weigh bags of nails, and answer hardware questions. Also, chagrined that Alissa seems to have a massive crush on the Rutherford Ice Hogs' star hockey player, Tommy becomes concerned that he's not manly enough.moreless
    • Ep 15
      The House That Dick Built
      2/23/99
      9.0
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      Dick feels like his control over the mission is falling to pieces when Sally decides to move out, and Harry considers having a baby with Vicki Dubcek. Dick tries to sabotage Sally's attempts to find a new place, but Sally decides to rent the apartment over Mrs. Dubcek's garage, Dick breaks in, posing as an intruder, to scare Sally into moving back home, but she beats the tar out of him. Meanwhile, Harry's debating whether or not he should have a baby with Vicki because he's unsure, both of his and Vicki's parenting abilities, and of the consequences of human/alien interbreeding. The two of them drop in on the house where Tommy's helping Alissa baby-sit so Harry can take the baby for a "test drive." When he sees how good Vicki is with the baby, he knows everything's going to be fine. Also, Tommy tries to figure out whether or not he's officially Alissa's "boyfriend."moreless
    • Ep 14
      Paranoid Dick
      2/16/99
      9.0
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      Albright's feeling a little uncertain about her waning power at the college, and Dick eggs her on into full-blown paranoia. As a result, she gets caught breaking into another professor's office looking for evidence of a nonexistent conspiracy against her, and winds up losing her deanship. Meanwhile, Vicki Dubcek convinces Sally that the perfect thing to help her get over her breakup with Don is a weekend of riverboat gambling on the Cincinnati Queen. Vicki and Sally engage in the rituals of backstage flirtation with a seductive Neil Diamond impersonator. Harry manages to win big at gambling without getting hooked, but loses all of his winnings to the lure of the casino gift shop.moreless
    • Ep 13
      Sally Forth
      2/9/99
      9.3
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      When Sally tells Officer Don she can't take living with Dick, Harry, and Tommy anymore, he assumes that she wants him to propose. Sally realizes, however, that what she really wants is to start living as an independent woman, and they tearfully break off their engagement. When Dick has a tenant-landlord dispute with the Dubceks, he casts Harry out of the family for consorting with the enemy. The situation escalates to the point where Dick, frozen and filthy, is reduced to squatting in his apartment without benefit of heat or lights. The feud ends when Dick realizes he was so preoccupied that he didn't pay attention to an important milestone in Sally's life -- her all-too-brief engagement. When Alissa, the girl of his dreams, gets detention, Tommy works hard to get punished as well, in the hopes that it will provide him with the perfect opportunity to ask her out.moreless
    • Ep 12
      Dick and Taxes
      2/2/99
      8.7
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      After three years on the planet, the Solomons finally learn about an organization called the IRS. They also learn that they owe it $9500. What to do? Dick's idea: "We can lie." Dick's never paid taxes, and after trying to fill out the forms himself, he enlists Mary's help. When he sees how much he owes, he decides to be the only American ever to think of the brilliant idea of cheating on his taxes. When Dick gets an audit notice, Tommy has to fudge an explanation for what each family member has been doing for the past six years. The auditor, however, doesn't buy any of it -- even the "we're aliens" defense, which he's heard before. The Solomons agree to pay their hefty tax bill, and thank their lucky stars their true identities are still a secret. As part of the tax deception, Sally pretends she had a failed home business -- a hair salon -- but when she puts up the sign, women start pouring in. Sally enjoys the camaraderie and the gossip, but never quite gets the hang of cutting hair, and with no repeat business, the salon fails for real.moreless
    • Ep 11
      Dick Solomon & the Indiana Solomons
      1/12/99
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    • Ep 10
      Two-Faced Dick
      1/5/99
      9.6
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      The Big Giant Head grants Sally's three-year-old request for a "gender reassignment" - and switches her body with Dick's. Meanwhile, Harry takes over Happy Doug's bar while Doug is on vacation. Responding to a three-year-old request from Sally that she be given a male body, the Big Giant Head switches Sally's body with Dick's. Each of them has to cope with all the thorny details of gender reassignment, including such specifics as how to deal with men's catcalls, and where to find cute shoes in Dick's size. Plus, each of them has to successfully maintain the other's romantic relationship. They each get as far as a kiss, but before things go any further, their request to switch back is granted, leaving them both far more knowledgeable about what it's like to be a member of the opposite sex. Also, vacationing Doug leaves Harry in charge of the bar, which turns ugly when some tough-looking bikers start hanging out there. Just when Harry and Tommy have decided that the bikers aren't such bad fellows after all, they rob the place, leaving it in a shambles.moreless
    • Ep 9
      Happy New Dick!
      12/15/98
      9.0
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      As the New Year approaches, Dick is in despair because he feels he hasn't accomplished anything all year. Meanwhile, Don gives Sally a necklace, then earrings, for Christmas but she wants more. Dick, pondering the significance of New Year's Eve, fears that he's done nothing of consequence in 1998. When he mistakenly thinks it's midnight a few minutes early, he embraces Mary and dances with her in the snow -- a perfect moment that he later realizes was not only his most meaningful act of 1998, but also a lovely way to start 1999. Harry hires Larry and Mrs. DeGuzman to work at Happy Doug's Bar with him, but they're both so dang lazy, he fires them both on New Year's Eve. Officer Don gets upset that Sally takes advantage of his nice-guy nature, and he lays down the law -- her cutesy, little-girl cajoling will no longer work on him. Sally realizes that with her feminine appeal comes a great deal of responsibility for using it benevolently, and she vows to do better in the New Year. Tommy, the party coordinator for Happy Doug's big celebration, is completely frazzled by the enormous responsibility of helping Rutherford ring in the New Year.moreless
    • Ep 8
      Indecent Dick
      12/9/98
      9.4
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      When Playpen magazine arrives at Pendelton for a model search, the Solomons react to the issue of nudity in different ways. The idea intrigues Sally, who decides to pose---which infuriates Don, who chooses to cancel his lifetime subscription. As for Dick, he encourages Sally, but becomes apoplectic when he learns that Mary posed for art photos 20 years before. And Harry? He simply takes off his clothes. "I just wanted to find out if this whole clothes thing is just a big scam," he explains. Meanwhile, Tommy's overdressed: he wants to impress his new lab partner Alissa.moreless
    • Ep 7
      D3: Judgement Day
      11/11/98
      9.2
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      Dick decides to dump Jennifer and finagle his way back into Mary's heart as an uproarious three-part romantic misadventure concludes. Dick, who has been driven to distraction by Jennifer's allergies and constant rhyming, is in luck, at least as far as Mary is concerned: she's seen him with Jennifer and is willing to eat some crow to win him back. It would seem that Dick holds all the cards. Now all he has to do is play them. Meanwhile, Officer Don turns Sally on to the joys of bowling, and comes to wish that he hadn't.moreless
    • Ep 6
      I Am Dick Pentameter!
      11/4/98
      9.0
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      Dick tells Mary he thinks they should see other people, and she laughingly agrees, not knowing he already has a candidate lined up--new officemate Jennifer. Dick is fascinated by Jennifer's intoxicating giggle, her adorable penchant for rhyming, and the brave way she copes with her numerous food allergies. Just as a furious Albright learns of Dick's new dalliance, he begins to grow less and less enchanted with Jennifer's eccentricities (particularly the rhyming), and to regret ever having ended things with Mary. Meanwhile, Sally, Harry, and Tommy question the limited functions of the kitchen and the living room, and decide to design an ber-room with the best elements of each--"the Klivingtchen."moreless
    • Ep 5
      What's Love Got to Do, Got to Do With Dick?
      10/28/98
      8.0
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    • Ep 4
      Collect Call for Dick
      10/21/98
      9.1
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      After Dick almost bites into a "Fuzzy Buddy" in a fast-food restaurant burger, he becomes obsessed with the collectibles. Meanwhile, Tommy goes overboard on school spirit when he becomes the basketball team's mascot. The Solomons confront the collector mentality when they discover Fuzzy Buddies -- highly collectible small plush animal toys. Sally enjoys the thrill of the hunt and the prospects for financial rewards, Harry just thinks they're cute, but for Dick it's deeper -- he enjoys the sensation of collecting until it gets to be like a drug for him, and his family and friends have to do an intervention. In an effort to instill "pep" into Tommy, the basketball coach forces him to become the team mascot, "Hootie the Owl." Initially contemptuous, Tommy finds that folks (especially cute cheerleaders) dig him when he's in costume, and the power goes to his head. When the team loses, Tommy, high on school spirit, tackles the coach, landing him in the principal's office.moreless
    • Ep 3
      Feelin' Albright
      10/14/98
      8.8
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      When Sally learns that she's not Don's first girlfriend, she is consumed with retrospective jealousy and determines to track down his exes. Meanwhile, Dick learns what it's like to be the dean's boyfriend when everyone ignores him at a function except the other "faculty wives". He decides to prove his worth by staging a fashion show to raise money for repairs to the campus statue, but succeeds in raising only $100 above expenses. Meanwhile, Harry and Tommy "creep out" Mrs. Dubcek by setting themselves up in business with a lemonade stand.moreless
    • Ep 2
      Power Mad Dick
      10/7/98
      9.1
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      When Mary is named the new dean, Dick assumes her power also applies to him, and wastes no time in firing his nemesis from the lunchroom, Lucy -- who immediately files a grievance. Meanwhile, an excited Sally prepared to lose her virginity to Don, but finds herself unable to discuss the event with anyone.moreless
    • Ep 1
      Doctor Solomon's Traveling Alien Show (2)
      9/23/98
      8.7
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      Discovering that Harry has been kidnapped, the other aliens search for him, somewhat handicapped by the fact that the Big Giant Head is punishing them for not filing their reports by shutting down Dick's higher brain functions.
  • Season 3
    • Ep 27
      Eat, Drink, Dick, Mary (1)
      5/20/98
      9.2
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      The Solomons wind up their third season -- and perhaps their mission on Earth -- with a romantic dinner party that turns predictably raucous. The chef is Tommy, who has just "come out" as a gourmet. The guests: Dick and Mary, Don and Sally and Harry and Mrs. Dubcek's amorous daughter Vicki, who is back in his life. The trouble is, Vicki's jealous ex-boyfriend is hot on her trail. He's also hot to "put a hurt" on the competition and kidnaps Harry just before he transmits a message from the Big Giant Head. The other Solomons miss the communiqu, which promises devastating consequences for the family.moreless
    • Ep 26
      The Tooth Harry
      5/20/98
      9.3
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      Mary is asked to appear in a new Pendelton University promotional video. Dick whines until he is also allowed to participate. Unfortunately, neither of them shares the director's vision of what their "performances" should be like, and they are unceremoniously replaced by other "actors" (including Tommy). Harry volunteers to drive Nina to the dentist. A romance develops, but fizzles when the money Harry leaves under Nina's pillow as a Tooth Fairy reward is misinterpreted, and Nina, highly offended, throws him out. Officer Don gives Sally a key to his apartment, but his glee soon turns to gloom when she starts seeing the place as less of a love nest and more of a one-woman party zone that she can trash whenever she wants to. When Don calls her attention to her inconsiderate behavior, she apologizes -- but he still takes back his key.moreless
    • Ep 25
      When Aliens Camp
      5/13/98
      9.1
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      Dick takes the family camping as a mission bonding activity. At the campsite, the family and Mary all become angry with Dick -- the family because he lies about bringing Mary along after he tells them it's "family only," and Mary because he tells her the family doesn't mind she's coming along. After they all cast him out, Dick goes off by himself and attempts to form a new society with a troop of Beaver Scouts he encounters. The Solomons assume Dick is lost and set out to find him. They (especially Sally, who resents her command being usurped) initially reject Mary's offers of help in finding Dick... until they realize she knows a lot more about the outdoors than they do.moreless
    • Ep 24
      Sally and Don's First Kiss
      5/6/98
      9.3
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      Sally turns to romance novels for inspiration when it's time for her first kiss with Officer Don. Unfortunately, whether they try it on a windy, moonlit bluff or in the Solomons' kitchen, the kiss just isn't special enough. Sally becomes resigned to breaking up with Don, but when she goes to the police stable to tell him, the magical combination of horses, thunder, lightning, and Don's newfound forcefulness combine to make Sally realize Don's the guy for her after all. Dick is perturbed because Lucy the cafeteria lady charges him -- and only him -- for crackers. Realizing he has no control over her inexplicable dislike for him allows him to free himself from being bothered by her unjust treatment. Harry graduates from night school, and he and fellow classmates Mrs. DeGuzman and Larry reminisce about all the great times they had together during their ten-week enrollment.moreless
    • Ep 23
      Dick and the Other Guy
      4/28/98
      0.0
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    • Ep 23
      Dick and the Other Guy (2)
      4/28/98
      9.1
      Dick has a rival for the title of Pendelton's nuttiest professor -- and a rival for Albright's affections -- with the arrival of the mysterious Dr. Liam Neesam. Meanwhile, Sally feels that she's losing her touch with men after Don seems to lose interest in her.
    • Ep 22
      Just Your Average Dick (1)
      4/28/98
      8.9
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      John Cleese puts his zaniness to good use in a two-part guest shot as a new professor who's even nuttier than Dick. And smarter. He's hotshot Dr. Liam Neesam, and he's a little too good at everything he does. He makes his first appearance in Part 1, as Albright (Curtin) is getting fed up with the fact that Dick -- and the rest of the Solomons, for that matter -- are "weird." "It's like being around the Addams Family," she moans. So Dick sets out to make his brood "average," and succeeds so completely that Albright finds him boring. Enter the off-kilter Dr. Neesam, who she thinks is kind of charming.moreless
    • Ep 21
      The Physics of Being Dick
      4/15/98
      8.8
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      Dick demands that Sally and Harry go to work, so she signs on as Albright's research assistant and he gets a job tending bar. Then Dick decides on a career change for himself (he wants to be a cop) after a disastrous Career Day at Tommy's school.
    • Ep 20
      My Daddy's Little Girl
      4/1/98
      8.8
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      Albright's father walks out on his wife and into Sally's life, while Harry walks into Rutherford College's vacant radio studio and begins his career as a shock jock.
    • Ep 19
      Portrait of Tommy as an Old Man
      2/25/98
      8.8
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      Tommy, tired of having to handle all of the "kid" duties [when in reality he's the oldest member of the mission], decides to retire. After he spends some time at a retirement home, he changes his mind, realizing that a big part of what makes you old is acting -- and being treated - like your old. Dick, thinking that Mary is anguished because she never got a chance to fulfill her fantasy of becoming a torch singer, tries to help her to realize that dream. He learns that sometimes the choices we make between two career paths can be right on the money. In a moment of weakness, Officer Don steals a pair of Sally's panties, and makes a series of vain attempts to return them without being caught in the act.moreless
    • Ep 18
      Stuck With Dick
      3/18/98
      0.0
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    • Ep 17
      Auto EuroDicka
      2/4/98
      8.7
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      Dick has casual sex with a woman he meets in line at the movies, then doesn't understand why Dr. Albright gets upset when he keeps talking about the encounter. Dick learns that the woman is the mother of one of his students, Bug, whose father and brothers pay a visit to Dick in an effort to teach him to show a little more respect. Sally decides she needs her own car, and she, Harry, and Tommy learn about the joys of shopping at a used car lot, where they learn that the salesman is decidedly not a "friend who's there to help."moreless
    • Ep 16
      Pickles and Ice Cream
      1/28/98
      9.0
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      Harry's pet follows him to Earth -- in human form; Sally visits her first gynecologist and decides to pretend she is pregnant.
    • Ep 15
      36! 24! 36! Dick! (2)
      1/25/98
      8.6
      Venusians disguised as gorgeous babes plot to plunder Earth of its riches in an uproarious episode that climaxes at Super Bowl XXXII in San Diego. When hordes of beautiful women start showing up in sleepy Rutherford, Ohio -- and seem enthusiastic about dating average Joes like Dick, Harry, Tommy, and Officer Don - Sally suspects that something's amiss. Before she can warn anyone that the women are really Venusians bent on dominating Earth, they discover her and force her to become one of them. The Solomon men embark on a country-wide search for Sally that ends at the Super Bowl, where the lethal lovelies have planned to unleash their most devastating weapon yet -- the ultimate beer commercial, designed to enslave mankind into coughing up the rest of their pricey consumer goods. In the supervixens' lair, the Solomon men seem defeated, but with the help of Sally, who only pretended to turn against them, and Venusian Mascha (Crawford), who's been won over by Harry's simple charms, Dick and company jam the commercial broadcast, explode the mother ship, and convince the supervixens that a career in modeling might suit them. Meanwhile, Albright and Nina's plans to attend the Super Bowl are thwarted when the Solomons steal their tickets to gain access to the Venusians, and back in Rutherford, Officer Don throws a decidedly low-key Super Bowl party.moreless
    • Ep 15
      36/24/36 Dick, Part 2
      1/25/98
      0.0
      go
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    • Ep 14
      36! 24! 36! Dick! (1)
      1/25/98
      8.7
      go
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      Subscription
      Venusians disguised as gorgeous babes plot to plunder Earth of its riches in an uproarious episode that climaxes at Super Bowl XXXII in San Diego. When hordes of beautiful women start showing up in sleepy Rutherford, Ohio -- and seem enthusiastic about dating average Joes like Dick, Harry, Tommy, and Officer Don - Sally suspects that something's amiss. Before she can warn anyone that the women are really Venusians bent on dominating Earth, they discover her and force her to become one of them. The Solomon men embark on a country-wide search for Sally that ends at the Super Bowl, where the lethal lovelies have planned to unleash their most devastating weapon yet -- the ultimate beer commercial, designed to enslave mankind into coughing up the rest of their pricey consumer goods. In the supervixens' lair, the Solomon men seem defeated, but with the help of Sally, who only pretended to turn against them, and Venusian Mascha [ Cindy Crawford ], who's been won over by Harry's simple charms, Dick and company jam the commercial broadcast, explode the mother ship, and convince the supervixens that a career in modeling might suit them. Meanwhile, Albright and Nina's plans to attend the Super Bowl are thwarted when the Solomons steal their tickets to gain access to the Venusians, and back in Rutherford, Officer Don throws a decidedly low-key Super Bowl party.moreless
    • Ep 13
      The Great Dickdater
      1/21/98
      9.0
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      Dick decides that it's time to date again, so he goes to Sally and Officer Don for advice; Harry and Tommy find a wallet with $200 in it, and return the money to the owner.
    • Ep 12
      Dick on a Roll
      1/7/98
      8.9
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      Dick hurts himself playing in a wheelchair, which puts him in one for real -- and turns him into an angry advocate for handicapped rights. Meanwhile, Dubcek's daughter Vicki visits but decides to become celibate, much to Harry's chagrin.
    • Ep 11
      Jailhouse Dick
      12/17/97
      8.8
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      Dick thinks he's doing the right thing when he offers to personally rehabilitate a criminal, but winds up doing more harm than good; Sally tries to help Mary find a new home for Pepper; and Harry struggles to complete a book report on Little Women.
    • Ep 10
      Tom, Dick and Mary
      12/3/97
      9.2
      go
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      Tommy tells Dick he'd really like to meet a woman closer to his real age, say someone like Angie Dickinson. Sally says it's time for her to go out and look for a real job. Dick thinks Harry's watching far too much television and orders him to give it up for a week. Tommy goes to Mary's to return her magnifying glass that Dick has broken, and Mary observes how immature Dick is. They start talking and are immediately engrossed in a discussion about the Aztecs. Their mutual attraction is obvious. Sally is hired as an assistant by Webber, a man who's very impressed by her appearance and couldn't care less about her lack of typing skills. Dick is wild with curiosity when Mary has a lunch date with a mystery man named Tom. August tries to resume her relationship with Tommy, but he tells her he's seeing someone. ''''

      Tommy asks Dick if he's still interested in Mary, and Dick pretends he couldn't care less; Tommy couldn't be happier. Sally likes her new job, but she's already been advised that she must learn to respect her co-workers. She takes this advice so seriously that when her boss starts hitting on her, she somehow thinks she's at fault. She goes to see Nina who quickly explains that her new boss is a creep and she's the one being harassed. Dick shows up and begs Nina to tell him who Mary's been seeing; Sally tells him that right now Tommy's at Mary's house. Dick rushes to Mary's and confronts Tommy who tells him that this is the happiest he's been since he arrived on this planet. He tells Dick that it's too late, that Dick already gave him the all clear. He tells Dick to leave or he'll call the cops. Sally threatens Webber with violence, and she loses her job. Dick shows up at Mary's again and starts fighting with Tommy over Mary. Mary tells Dick to grow up, but after putting up a good fight, Tommy tells Dick that he can have Mary back. Mary has no idea what's going on and is even more puzzled when Tommy tells her there's no hope for their relationship.moreless

    • Ep 9
      Seven Deadly Clips
      12/3/97
      8.0
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      The Solomons reflect on their sinful ways in an episode that illustrates their misdeeds in clips from past episodes.
    • Ep 8
      A Friend in Dick
      11/19/97
      9.0
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      Dick, friendless after his breakup with Albright, tries to shoehorn Officer Don into his life as best friend and constant companion... with mixed results. Sally shanghais the slickly popular dancer Peter Connelly ("King of the Jig") to Johnny Foam's Cafe as a sacrificial lamb for her moody artist boyfriend Seth, and is horrified to learn that rather than the dark and tortured soul the fell for, Seth is a poseur... and a jig fan. Harry tries to get a job so he can buy Tommy some roller blades, but lacking the required diploma, he must first weather the indignities of night school.moreless
    • Ep 7
      Eleven Angry Men and One Dick
      11/12/97
      8.8
      Dick longs for the chance to administer his "unique brand of jurisprudence" when he's called for jury duty; Sally falls for an "artist" [ to Officer Don's chagrin ]; and Tommy and Harry help Albright with a "preverbal" project [ they must remain mute for five days ].
    • Ep 7
      Eleven Angry Men and A Dick
      11/12/97
      0.0
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    • Ep 6
      Moby Dick
      11/5/97
      9.0
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      Dick discovers he's put on an enormous amount of weight. Nina tells him that is because he's sad about the break up with Mary. Everyone tries to get him on diet, but it's useless.''Sally has a new tomato plant, and she takes care of it like a person. She even names it Jeremy, and when Don hears about Sally spending so much time with "him", Don thinks about the worst.''Tommy feels that August is cheating on him, so he sends Harry to spy on her.moreless
    • Ep 5
      Scaredy Dick
      10/29/97
      9.2
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      Dick turns out to be a scaredy cat when faced with the prospect of a physical exam. Meanwhile, Sally and Tommy house-sit at Albright's house on Halloween night -- that's bad news for neighborhood trick-or-treaters -- and Harry stays home alone, except for some very weird noises coming from the basement.moreless
    • Ep 4
      Dick-In-Law
      10/15/97
      9.1
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      Dick inadvertently lets a huge skeleton out of Mary's parents' closet when he accompanies her on a trip to see her folks, while Sally adjusts to new closet space when she temporarily moves in with Nina.
    • Ep 3
      Tricky Dick
      10/8/97
      9.3
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      Dick and Mary take out their frustrations about their broken engagement on each other and begin an elaborate game of practical-joke one-upmanship, while Sally eyes her disinterested yoga instructor and Tommy reluctantly joins a garage band, with Harry as his roadie
    • Ep 2
      Fun with Dick and Janet (2)
      9/24/97
      8.8
      go
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      Dick receives an unpleasant order from the home planet on the hour-long third-season opener: he must marry the Big Giant Head's niece Janet. As Sally, Harry and Tommy escort Janet on the rocket to Earth, the bride-to-be sets out to prove that she's a true domestic goddess, brushing up on her skills by reading The Joy of Cooking, The Joy of Sex -- and The Joy of Yiddish. But a defiant Dick is sticking by Mary; whether Mary will stick by Dick is another question. Meanwhile, Janet's arrival in Rutherford is anything but quiet: Officer Don suspects that aliens have landed.moreless
    • Ep 1
      Fun with Dick and Janet (1)
      9/24/97
      9.0
      go
      Hulu Plus
      Subscription
      Dick receives an unpleasant order from the home planet on the hour-long third-season opener: he must marry the Big Giant Head's niece Janet. As Sally, Harry and Tommy escort Janet on the rocket to Earth, the bride-to-be sets out to prove that she's a true domestic goddess, brushing up on her skills by reading The Joy of Cooking, The Joy of Sex -- and The Joy of Yiddish. But a defiant Dick is sticking by Mary; whether Mary will stick by Dick is another question. Meanwhile, Janet's arrival in Rutherford is anything but quiet: Officer Don suspects that aliens have landed.moreless
  • Season 2
    • Season 1

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