Portrait of Tommy as an Old Man

Season 3, Episode 19, Aired

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Tommy, tired of having to handle all of the "kid" duties [when in reality he's the oldest member of the mission], decides to retire. After he spends some time at a retirement home, he changes his mind, realizing that a big part of what makes you old is acting -- and being treated - like your old. Dick, thinking that Mary is anguished because she never got a chance to fulfill her fantasy of becoming a torch singer, tries to help her to realize that dream. He learns that sometimes the choices we make between two career paths can be right on the money. In a moment of weakness, Officer Don steals a pair of Sally's panties, and makes a series of vain attempts to return them without being caught in the act.moreless
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      • (Harry has taken over Tommy's job as Information Officer) Dick: Harry, write this down. I need you to find a place - Harry: W-w-wait. (writing) I... need... you... to... find... Dick: Harry, forget writing it down. Just memorize it. I need you to find - Harry: W-w-wait. (puts his finger to his forehead) I... need... you... to... find... Dick: Harry, forget memorizing it. Just listen to me. I need you to find a place for Mary to sing. Harry? Harry: Oh, sorry, I was thinking about cake.

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      • Harry: Old people say the darndest things. This is a parody of a show hosted by Bill Cosby entitled "Kids Say the Darndest Things", on which Bill would ask a young child a question, and the kid would respond in a funny, precocious way.

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