8 Simple Rules

Paul: Well here we are, God's waiting room. Kerry: It smells like 1945 in here. Bridget: Everyone in this place looks like they host "60 Minutes". Rory: I'm going to do some recon sometimes Grandpa drops money he can't pick up.

Rory: I'm going to check out the babes. Oh my God, which ones are the men?

Rory: There's a chair in the shower, what's that about?

Bridget: God Mom, you're such a hypocrite. Plus you say one thing and do another.

Rory: (to Cate) You were really going to town on that beer!

Rory: (watching tv) Look at that girl, awesome! Kerry: That's not awesome that's.... Bridget and Kerry: Mom?!!

Paul: (On the phone) This is their son-in-law. Not the banker, the other son-in-law. Yes, they do. Yes, they do. Yes, they do!

Cate: Here's a picture of all of us. Paul: Honey, that's just my right eye. Cate: Mom couldn't fit everyone in. Paul: It was my birthday, I was blowing out the candles!

Bridget I have an idea on how we can save money around here. Paul: Talking less on the phone? Bridget: Close, going to Florida for spring break! Paul: How is that remotely close to talking less on the phone? Bridget: Duh, if were in Florida we can't be here talking on the phone.

Paul: I went for a walk and it came to me. This was the best vacation ever. I'm in Florida with my whole family and best of all I get the girl in the end. Cate: You went to a bar.

Cate: Paul, did you see the way [the girls] just treated me? Paul: Wow, it's almost as if you exposed your breasts on TV and then tried to preach morality.

Cate: How was hanging out with Jake? Rory: Great. Being old is cool. You get to yell at people, park anywhere, take you teeth out. I can't wait.

Rory: My folks would like to meet your parents. Jake: Got a Ouija board?

Paul: (about Florida) Here we are God's waiting room.

Cate: You know girls, even if money wasn't an issue, do you really think we'd let you go to Florida unsupervised? Bridget: I visualized it.

Cate: (to Paul) Somebody's stressed out. Oh paying the bills. Your time of the month.

Bridget: Imagine if Mom married him, I would be so much hotter! Kerry: Yeah, that's how genetics works.

Bridget: You went out with Officer Biceps? Kerry: And you're our mother!Bridget: Just think, if you had married him, I'd be even hotter!Kerry: Yeah, that's how genetics works!

Bridget: We're going swimming. Kerry: Yeah with our tops on. Bridget: Well maybe.