Accidentally on Purpose

Davis: What's the next move with this girl? Billie: Well, that depends. I mean, do we want to have a relationship with her or we're just looking to introduce our genitals to each other? Davis: Ah, I've done the whole just-get-laid-casual-sex-never-see-each-other-again thing, so what I'm ready for now... is more of that.

Davis: This chick is really out of my league. I mean, she's the kind that only sleeps with guys who have doors on their bathrooms. (pauses) You know, fancy guys.

Davis: I thought the two of you were cool with dating other people? Zack: Yeah, but who's going to date [Billie]? She's got stuff popping out all over the place. You know, and I want to be a good guy about this, so I'm just going to do it behind her back. Davis: (places hand on Zack's shoulder) You're a class act, Zack.

James: (to Billie) You know, since you and I broke up, I'm... not going to lie -- I've been skewing kinda young. My new formula is my age divided by two minus three.

Abby: Listen, I know that you think the only reason we're friends is because of Billie but that-- Olivia: That is not true! I don't think we're friends.

Zack: Uh, Sasha, look, how do I put this? Some foods just don't go together -- pickles and melon, whip cream and eggplant or-- Sasha: Radishes and yogurt. Oh God! I've heard this exact speech so many times. You're breaking up with me.

Andrea: I'm just not interested in anything more than a physical relationship with you. Davis: Why?! I mean, what is it about me? Is-- is it because I live in a dump? Or because I have no money... or any desire to make money? Because I have no goals or dreams... or desire to have any goals or dreams?