Alfred Hitchcock: (standing inside a jail cell, wearing striped prison coveralls) Good evening, fellow inmates. I suppose you're wondering why I'm here. I was picked by an agent from the Federal Bureau (looks puzzled)...the Bureau of Standards, that is. He claims I was lying about my weight. The vertical stripes were my tailor's idea. They not only give me that slim look, they also make it impossible for the guards to tell where the bars leave off and I begin. I have a different uniform for each day, and on each one, the stripes are closer together. In ten days, I expect to disappear completely. As for tonight's story, it is a somber little jig called "Silent Witness." It will occupy the space in just a moment.