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(On a mission Rachel unsuspectingly sleeps with Sark)
Sydney: Guess what happens in Brazil, stays in Brazil.
Jack: (walking in) What happened in Brazil?
Sydney: Ehh- Rachel got food poisoning.
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Tom: (about Sark) So who is this guy?
Sydney: Kidnapper, extortionist, murderer, the list goes on.
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Masari: (after shooting Elisabeth through her hand) Clearly you don't work with your hands.
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(After finding the truth about Sark, Rachel must go with him on a mission)
Sark: I must say, you're a quite fetching in black.
Rachel: I will gag you.
Sark: Does that mean we can't be friends?
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Sydney: When's the last time you did something just for fun?
Rachel: Hitting Gordon Dean on the head with a shovel - that was fun.
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Jack: I'm gonna be a grandfather. A very young grandfather.
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Marshall: Sounds awesome!
[Jack and the others look at him.]
Marshall: Well, Brazil. Isn't that, you know, the place where they have the, um, string... what are they called, not bikinis but, um--
Jack: Thongs.
Marshall: Yes.
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Rachel: (pausing before she cut the wire) Just so we're clear…you approached me. You were the one who was stupid enough to let me into your room. And afterwards, you were the one who wanted to cuddle.
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Sark: Wait, if that's the wrong wire…
Rachel: I thought you liked risks?
Sark: I also like my body…as I recall you do too.
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Rachel: So, what happened?
Sark: I overestimated my friendship with Masari. He assumed I was betraying him and he took the money and he left.
Rachel: Oh so then he knows you pretty well?
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Sark: (as Bob) So Lydia…you're here on business?
Rachel: (as Lydia) Yes, the…geek conference.
Sark: You heard that, huh?
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Elizabeth: You're asking me to investigate my own agency…that's treason.
Jack: What's a little treason between old friends?