All Grown Up!

Dil: Weirdorama. It's corinthian leather. But it smells like egg salad. Phil: That is so immature. (Sniffs the shoe) Cat butt, duh.

Mr. Beaker: Now, it's time for everyone's favorite time of the year - science projects! (Students groan)

Lil: I was doing what you're supposed to do on vacation. Absolutely nothing. Phil: It's, like, what she does best.

Lil: Here we are on our oh-so-glorious vacation at Twins Canyon, wearing our happening outfits. Dil: Would've looked better on me.

Leslie: All the right kids are here. Diane: Yeah. No lame-brains or dorks. Oh, by the way, where is your brother tonight? Lil: Not here! Diane: He really is a boob, isn't he? Leslie: My vote is for immature slob. Brett: Are you talking about Phil? He's like totally obnoxious in class. Lil: Not all the time. Diane: Not to mention gross and smelly. Leslie: This is fun! And he's really goofy looking, too. Lil: Not like I'm standing up for him or anything, but it's sometimes fun to be gross. And you know, Phil and I are twins, so if you think he's goofy looking, then I guess you think I am, too.

Lil: Hey! I can call him a jerk or a slob, but you guys can't. You don't even know him! He can actually be cool sometimes, and fun, and funny, and loyal.

Lil: Great party, Diane. Diane: Thanks. I opened all the bags of chips myself. Lil: What a workout.

Tommy: You held it for over an hour? That's amazing, Chuckie! Chuckie: Yep, and I think by tomorrow I'll be able to put my arms down. Pangborn: Okay, Finster, take a day for your arms to heal. Chuckie: Thanks, Mr. Pangborn. Pangborn: I'll just plan on you taking the test tomorrow. Chuckie: Oh.

Phil: Dil, we gotta slow this twin thing down. It's not like you're not trying. I mean, that mash potato sculpture of us arm in arm was pretty cool. I hated to eat it. Dil: You ate the sculpture? Phil: I saved the ears. They're in the freezer. Dil: Say no more. In the world of twins, when you eat the potato sculpture, you've said goodbye. And you know, somewhere out there, there are twins who are willing to make me...their Triplet! (salutes and walks away)

Betty: Calm down, Philly. Lil gets her own room, but think about it, so do you, and the computer stays here. And you finally have room for that basketball hoop you've always wanted, and you can paint the place any color you like, except tangerine 'cause it makes your father wig out.

(To Dil) Phil: Phil: F.Y.I. Banana Head.

Video Game: You have been vaporized. Phil: Anyone here wanna be my co-pilot? (Dil enters) Dil: Reporting for duty. Sir! Phil: Okay, anyone else wanna be my co-pilot?

Lil: One of us came two minutes earlier, thank you very much.

(Lil is looking at herself in the mirror, practicing for her appearance at the party) Lil: Hi, Diane, what's up? Hey, Brett, how you doing? Betty: I'm doing pretty good. Lil: Ahh! Betty: I get that a lot.

Betty: Jeez! This is awful. Howard: I know, we even have to have another set of twins or actually pay for a vacation. Betty: No, Howie, we have a bigger problem than a lost vacation. Our little Lil is sad. Howard: Right.

Chuckie: I've been humiliated year after year, and now my suffering's over! Today I am taking a stand for coordinately-challenged kids everywhere! Tommy: And tomorrow? Chuckie: Tommy, don't ruin my moment.

Chuckie: I was exercising my right to say no to the President and his stupid test. I made a stand by refusing to show up. Tommy: Chuckie Finster skipped a class? Chuckie: Actually, I was hanging out in the nurse's office.

Phil: Tommy, you're not listening. One minute, we're twins and everything's fine. And the next, it's "me," not "we." I mean, what's up with that? Dil: Maybe a prehistoric mother worm laid her eggs in Lil's brain.

Lil: Twins this, twins that. It's always Phil and Lil! It's never even Lil and Phil! There's too much "we"; not enough "me"! I am not wearing anything to that place because I am not going!

Phil: Little brother! Give me a break! So you're two minutes older. Lil: Do you know what that is in girl years? Now, do you mind?

Lil: He's Phil and I'm Lil. Two names, separated by the word "and." I am a thinking, breathing, independent individual and he's... Phil.

Lil: Why are we partners on every project? It's always Phil and Lil this! Phil and Lil that! Newsflash! We're not two heads on one body! We are just two separate people who happen to live in the same house.

Lil: Get away from me! Now! Phil: I'll take that as a "maybe"... (Lil gives him a dirty look) Phil: Okay, a "no."

Mr. Beaker: Morning. Sit down, find your chairs this time. Now, ignore my mumbling as I write on the board. Enjoy my back.

Chuckie: This test is stupid and humiliating! I can't even do the simplest rope climb. Tommy: Chuckie, you made it almost to the top. Chuckie: Only 'cause Pangborn pushed me halfway up!

Betty: Chassy, I am clearly off my game. Chas: But on my pelvic bone.

Phil: You used to love to play "What's my smell?." Lil: Like a gazillion years ago! Phil: Don't you mean quadrogillion? Come on, you're supposed to say megaquatrillion.

Phil: Hey, Lil! You'll never believe it! Dil sniffed my armpit and thought it was fish!

Phil: Thanks, I'll pay you back. As soon as that no-allowance-for-a-month thing is over. How was I suppose to know Kimi's great aunt was in that vase? They should label that stuff.

Lil: We'll be paying separately. I have my own money. Phil: Uh, me, too. Just not today.

Phil: Excellent spewage, Lil.

Pangborn: Finster, what are you doing? Chuckie: Drowning, sir?

Dil: Besides, it all works out. You need a Lil, and I'm a Dil!

Phil: So, what? You're sayin' I'm immature?

Dil: We have the same problem. We're both suddenly "twinless." Phil: Dil, you never had a twin. Dil: Right! Just one more thing to check off my to-do list.