Michael Stivic (1971-1978)
Gloria Stivic (1971-1978)
Mr. Bushmill: Let me ask you something, would you hire my boy down where you work?
Archie: Where I work? No. 'cause where I work, you've got to be on your toes, see? And to be on your toes, you've got to know where you toes are.
Mr. Bushmill: Funny, funny. Everybody's got excuses. You see, that's why these kids don't have a real chance to hold down a job! If they did, they would do great.
Archie: Yeah, but after all, the "versa visa" is true. I mean, people do get a little scared of them kids. They don't know what they're gonna do. Maybe they're gonna play with matches.
Mr. Bushmill: Matches?
Archie: Yeah, there was a kid like that where Edith and I used to live on Union Street. He set fire to a canary.
Mr. Bushmill: You're not talking about somebody who's mentally handicapped. You're talking about pyromania!
Archie: No, I think the family was from Hungary.
Michael: 'Every man is my superior in that I may learn from him'. Gee, I wonder who said that.
Edith: I think it was David Carradine in Kung Fu.
Mike: You know Arch, you ought to be in the Guiness Book of World Records? Most stupid remarks made in a single day!
Mr. Bushmill: Get one thing straight Bunker, my kid doesn't have to weave baskets, you understand? He's gonna make it on his own like his brother.
Archie: Aw geez, you got another one like him?
Mr. Bushmill: It don't run in families, hey? As a matter fact George's brother just passed his bar exam.
Archie: Oh yeah? Where's he tend bar?
Mike: You just broke your own record.
Mr. Bushmill: George's brother is a lawyer. Now you see the point I'm trying to make, Bunker, is that it's not inherited. You ought to know that, you got a perfectly normal daughter!
(George returns to the Bunker house with what he wanted to show Archie, a sign he kept above his coat at work)
George: Here, here, read it, Mr. Bunker, read it!
Archie: All right George let me see what it says here.
George: Oh you read that real good Mr. Bunker.
Archie: Thanks George, what the hell does it mean?
Mike: It means everyone is smarter than you, Arch!
Archie: (to George's father) How'd George get like that? When he was a baby, did someone throw him up in the air, and forget to catch him?
Mr. Bushmill : It's a common birth defect. The doctors call it anoxia, it means he didn't enough oxygen when he was born. Now that's what happened to George...what's your excuse?
Archie : I don't understand that question.
George: (after having fixed the blade in the plane which Archie put in backwards) Don't worry Mr. Bunker, sometimes I get things backwards too.
Archie: (regarding George) I know how to talk to a D-U-M-M-Y!
George: I know how to spell, and I'm not dumb!
This episode was videotaped on January 18, 1974.
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