I decided to make my own since Ask Ashley is one of my favorites.
Announcer: Hi Everyone, it's time for Ask Ashley.
Ashley:[smiles] Thaaaaaaaat's Meeeeeee! Hi, I'm Ashley and I'm here to answer more of your letters. The first on is from, Arnold Palmer of Key West, Florida. Arnold writes: Dear Ashley...... Thaat's me. Dear Ashley, it has been raining for the past three days and the wind has been hurling at my house debris. Every time I try to throw it out, it keeps coming back in. Ashley, what is this mysterious thing? Good question, Arnold, I think I know what it is. YOUR HOUSE IS BEING DESTROYED BY A STINKING HURRICANE!!!! IT'S A HURRICANE, YOU NIMROD! What kind of idiot writes to a show, not knowing what a hurricane is? Everyone has known about it, except you. Instead of being in yor room, wondering about what a hurricane is, get out of your stinkin house RIGHT NOW!!!!! MAAAAAANNNNN!!!!!!
Ashley:[smiles] Our next letter comes from Lucy Lewis of Seattle, WA. Lucy writes: Dear Ashley. Thaat's me. Dear Ashley, there is a wierd little girl who follows me around. When I go to another place, she keeps asking me to play dolls with her. Who is this girl? Good question, Lucy, and here's my answer to it. SHE'S YOUR LITTLE SISTER! YOUR LITTLE SISTER, YOU BRAIN DEAD BIMBO! Oh Lucy's little sister, I have one advice for you: RUN AWAY! IT'S CLEAR THAT YOU'RE MUCH SMARTER THAN YOUR OLDER SISTER. LUCY, IF YOU WANT TO GET TO KNOW SOMEONE JUST LIKE YOU, THEN HOP ON A STINKIN PLANE DOWN TO KEY WEST, FL AND LOOK UP ARNOLD PALMER!! HE WON'T BE HARD TO FIND BECAUSE HE'LL BE IN HIS ROOM BEING CLUELESS ABOUT WHAT A HURRICANE IS!!!!! MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!!!
Ashley:[smiles] Our last letter comes from Ryan Bazooka of Annapolis, Maryland. Ryan writes: Dear Ashley.......... Thaaaaaaaaaaat's meeeeeeee! Dear Ashley, I like eating chicken noodle soup, but every time I eat it, I always end up going to the bathroom. No matter how much I try to resist the temptation to not throw up, I fail. What's wrong with me? Gee Ryan, I know what's wrong with you. YOU'RE STINKING SICK!!!!! You're down with the flu you numbskull. Duh, my name is Ryan and I don't know the flu is and blah-de-blad-de-blah-de-BLAH! TELL YOU WHAT, AS SOON AS YOU REST UP AND GET BETTER, HEAD DOWN TO SEATTLE, WA, AND LOOK UP LUCY LEWIS!!! SHE WON'T BE HARD TO FIND BECAUSE SHE'S THE MORON WHOSE CONFUSED ABOUT HER LITTLE SISTER!!!! THEN, THE TWO OF YOU CAN FLY DOWN TO KEY WEST, FL AND WATCH ARNOLD PALMER'S HOUSE GET DESTROYED BY A HURRICANE WHILE HE STAYS IN HIS ROOM WONDERING WHAT A HURRICANE IS!! GUESS WHAT, ALL THREE OF YOU WILL BE BLOWN AWAY, YOU BRAIN DEAD FREAKS!!!! MAAAAAAAAAN!!!! Well that's all the Advice I have for you today. Buh Bye everyone.