Allo! Allo!

Crabtree: I take it you are ribbing the bonk. Rene: Yes we are ribbing the bonk! Crabtree: But that is against the loo! It is licky for you that I am on your sod.

Herr Flick: I will kick Von Smallhausen with my good leg. Helga: What wrong has he done? Herr Flick: None. But I shall feel better for it.

Helga: You are looking very pensive, Herr Flick. And your brow is furrowed like a ploughed field.

Rene: I am not going to rob a bank! I would get life! Or even longer.

(talking about Rene) Bertorelli: He is overweight-a Frog. What's he got, eh? Why all the girls got-a the hots for him? Gruber: (looking on lovingly) It is because he is all man.

Gruber: Their leader seems to be on very good terms with Rene. Bertorelli: What-a she see in him when there is-a me, with the figure, the uniform with the medals, the handsome face with the broad smile and the strong-a,white teeth? Von Strohm: Perhaps she doesn't like the dead chicken on your head.

Louise: We should take these enemies of France outside, put zem up against the wall of ze barn and bump zem off. Bertorelli: You a beautiful lady. Why you so damned aggressive, eh? You should not make-a the war, you should make-a the love. Denise: Does anybody fancy this Italian before we shoot him? Fat Resistance Girl: He could be quite amusing I suppose, for an hour or two. Berotelli:I have-a the last request. Denise: What is it? Berotelli: I must-a wear the blindfold. Denise: Before you are shot? Berotelli: Before I make-a the love.