Allo! Allo!

Season 1 Episode 1

The British Are Coming

Aired Unknown Dec 30, 1982 on BBC
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Episode Summary

The British Are Coming
We meet René Artois, owner of a small café in the French village of Nouvion during WWII. René leads a simple life and is married to the tone-deaf Edith (who nevertheless loves to sing) and at the same time carrying on secret affairs with his two waitresses, Yvette and Maria. At the same time, René tries to maintain a good relationship with the occupying German officers - offering them the bedroom services of his waitresses in exchange for food and supplies.

All of this quickly changes when Michelle Dubois, a member of the French Resistance, arrives with two British airmen that must be kept hidden at René's café. A radio (to contact the Resistance) is also installed.

Meanwhile, the Germans - Colonel Von Strohm, Captain Geering, Lt. Gruber and Private Helga - have been busy getting their hands on the town's remaining valuables such as the first cuckoo clock ever made and the painting "The Fallen Madonna with the Big Boobies" by Van Clomp. However, simple life is not to last for the Germans either as the ruthless Herr Flick of the Gestapo shows up. Hurriedly, the Germans form an alliance with René and decide to hide the cuckoo clock and the painting at the café to sell them after the war is over.moreless

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Guy Siner

Guy Siner

Lieutenant Hubert Gruber

Gorden Kaye

Gorden Kaye

René Artois

Carmen Silvera

Carmen Silvera

Edith Melba Artois

Vicki Michelle

Vicki Michelle

Yvette Carte-Blanche

Kirsten Cooke

Kirsten Cooke

Michelle Dubois

Richard Marner

Richard Marner

Colonel Kurt Von Strohm

Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions


  • TRIVIA (0)

  • QUOTES (5)

    • (René and Edith are talking to London on the radio in Fanny's room)
      René (to the radio): Allo, allo! This is Nighthawk. Can you hear me? Can you hear me? Over.
      Fanny (interrupts): Of course I can hear you.
      René: Not you! Shut up!
      Radio: Allo, allo! Pass your message.
      René (To Edith): What is the code to tell them the British airmen have arrived?
      Edith: "The little cupboard is full."
      Fanny : Ah? What is that?
      René: The little cupboard is full!
      Fanny (interrupts again): Oh no, no, no. I have not used it all the day!

    • Michelle: Did my men come to fix the radio transmitter?
      René: Yes, they have put it in the attic room.
      Edith: It is the room of my mother.
      René: It is the only place where nobody goes unless they have to.

    • Helga: Do you have an appointment?
      Herr Flick: I am Otto Flick of the Gestapo.
      Helga: Oh, you don't need an appointment.

    • Michelle: Is your wife's mother prepared to die for France?
      René: She's been prepared to die for 30 years but she doesn't go. I think God does not want the aggrevation.

    • (About Edith)
      René: This is my wife, Edith. I have told her everything.
      Michelle: Will she talk?
      René: Incessantly, but not about anything important.

  • NOTES (3)

    • A number of the French accents on display in this episode are a bit different to what we became accustomed
      to, particularly those of Rene (Gorden Kaye), Helga (Kim Hartman) and Michelle (Kirsten Cooke), but this
      can be explained away as it was recorded around 18 months before the first series.

    • This premiere episode introduces the following regular actors: Gorden Kaye (René), Carmen Silvera (Edith), Vicki Michelle (Yvette), Francesca Gonshaw (Maria), Richard Marner (Colonel von Strohm), Sam Kelly (Captain Hans Geering), Guy Siner (Lt. Gruber), Kim Hartman (Helga), Kirsten Cooke (Michelle), Richard Gibson (Herr Flick), Rose Hill (Fanny), Jack Haig (Leclerc), John D. Collins (Airman Fairfax) and Nicholas Frankau (Airman Carstairs).

    • Later rebroadcast on September 7, 1984 to lead into Season 1.