Allo! Allo!

Season 1 Episode 2

The Fallen Madonna

Aired Unknown Sep 14, 1984 on BBC
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Episode Summary

The Fallen Madonna
The Colonel & the Captain mull over their situation and decide they should probably hand over Rene and the painting to the Gestapo in order to get rid of Herr Flick. But Rene convinces them that they could hand over a forged copy of the painting instead (with the assistance of a conveniently-located forger), and gets them to lend their uniforms to the escaping British officers so the Brits can take the painting to England to be forged.

Meanwhile, everyone keeps handing Rene poison pills "to make it easier", Herr Flick decides his relationship with Helga should include an intimate dinner in Rene's back room, and Hans figures out that putting cheese in one's ears improves the sound of Madame Edith's singing.moreless

Who was the Episode MVP ?

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Guy Siner

Guy Siner

Lieutenant Hubert Gruber

Gorden Kaye

Gorden Kaye

René Artois

Carmen Silvera

Carmen Silvera

Edith Melba Artois

Vicki Michelle

Vicki Michelle

Yvette Carte-Blanche

Kirsten Cooke

Kirsten Cooke

Michelle Dubois

Richard Marner

Richard Marner

Colonel Kurt Von Strohm

Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions


  • TRIVIA (0)

  • QUOTES (10)

    • Yvette: Oh René, you are so brave. While you were there, I lit candles!
      René: You were praying for me?
      Yvette: We had a power cut.

    • (René misunderstands Captain and Colonel's conversation)
      René: Oh, no! Not the pliers and the rubber hose! I will tell you everything I know!

    • Michelle: Where are the two British airmen?
      Edith: They are hiding in the room of my mother.
      Michelle: And the forger?
      René: He is disguised as a piano player.
      Edith: He plays for me when I sing for the customers.
      René: He is a very bad pianist but when my wife sings nobody notices. The customers stuff cheese in their ears.

    • Edith: Should I sing a song to distract everybody?
      René: No, we don't want to lose any more customers.

    • (René and Yvette discuss René and Edith's sex life)
      René: I let her think I am not interested in that kind of thing anymore.
      Yvette: Does she believe you?
      René: She has to. I make her sleep in the wardrobe.

    • Yvette: René, my love.
      René: Yvette, my flower.
      Yvette: You are the most exciting man I have ever known! Let me kiss you, let me hold you tight!
      René (holding a brick): No, my cabbage, no. It is getting hard, I must get it in immediately.

    • Yvette (About René): The patron knows his limitations. He is not acquainted with the art of laying bricks.
      Maria: He is certainly acquainted with the art of laying everything else!

    • (Yvette brings a cooking bowl full of cement which she carried through the café)
      René: Was nobody suspicious?
      Yvette: One of the officers put his finger in it and tested it!
      René: My God! What happened?
      Yvette: He said your wife's cooking was getting better!

    • Hans: Colonel, we are Germans! To have our uniforms made in London must be against the rules!

    • Rene: Lay this brick.
      Yvette: But I have no experience laying bricks.
      Edith: Just pretend it is a German officer.

  • NOTES (4)

    • Michelle gives Rene the ring containing a suicide pill. Later in the episode, the Colonel gives him two more
      similar rings. Rene suggests to the Colonel that they could have a copy made of the "Fallen Madonna" painting, one to give the Gestapo, with the original safely hidden away till the war is over. This begins an
      ongoing plot that would run right through to the final episode.

    • Rene calls his wife a "silly old bat" for the first time. He also tells her mother to "shut up". The two combined
      would become a memorable catchphrase of the show.

    • Lisa Anselmi is uncredited.

    • In this episode, Hans discovers that putting cheese in one's ears makes Edith's singing sound less terrible. This would go on to become a recurring gag from now on.