American Dad!

Season 1 Episode 14

Stannie Get Your Gun

Aired Monday 9:30 PM Nov 20, 2005 on TBS



  • Trivia

    • The sign at the Jamboree reads:
      NGA Kids Jamboree
      Featuring Haley & Papa Wheelie

    • When Hayley throws the guitar into a slime lake at NGA Land, only the two NGA Directors get covered in it, even though Stan was standing right next to them and should've gotten covered in it, too.

    • At the beginning of the episode, before Hayley reveals that she's handcuffed to the oven, Francine is on Hayley's left side. Afterwards, she's to her right.

  • Quotes

    • Francine: Look at you two. Who would've thought guns would bring you so close together?
      Stan: I know. If only we could get some guns to the Middle East.

    • Hayley: But you were paralyzed by a gun.
      Stan: No, I was paralyzed by you. Look, I'm not going to point fingers here, because I can't. Because of you.

    • Stan: Hey, don't worry about me. I'm still your same old dad. What's that sound? Oh, I'm peeing. Fantastic!

    • Hayley: (Hears laughter) What the hell! That's the burglar! Dad staged the whole thing!
      Francine: Yeah, I get it, Hayley. I'm unrape-able, not stupid.

    • Hayley: I'm such a hypocrite!
      Francine: Honey, he was robbing us. And he was gonna force himself on me.
      Hayley: He said that?
      Francine: Well, no, but I assume.
      (Hayley glares)
      Francine: What? You think I'm not attractive enough? That-That what? That he's just skip me and go straight to you? Well, aren't we conceited?

    • (Gunshot is heard)
      Hayley: I... I shot him.
      Stan: Murderer! Just kidding. You saved the family, kiddo. Pizza? Let's order pizza.

    • Stan: Look, the NGA is the only thing in my life that means anything to me.
      Francine: (Coughing) Ahem.
      Stan: What, are you getting sick? Don't come near me! I can't afford to get sick!

    • Hayley: NGA Land? A gun park?!
      Stan: Yeah, Sugar Mountain closed down years ago. This is basically the same thing, except instead of riding a choo-choo through Fairy Book Land, you'll ride a bullet through a mugger's chest.

    • Francine: The point is, there was a time when you two weren't always fighting.
      Hayley: That was before I knew Dad was a gun-toting maniac.
      Stan: Beatnik!
      Hayley: Warmonger!
      Stan: Chupacabra!
      Hayley: I'm the Mexican Bigfoot?
      Stan: You heard her! She admitted it!

    • Stan: See? Guns don't kill people. People kill people. Guns defend people against people with smaller guns.
      Hayley: You're such a fascist!
      Stan: Peace pusher!
      Hayley: Murderer!
      Stan: Hermaphrodite!

    • Terry: (On TV) Our top story, a car was broken into Cherry Street this afternoon. My car. The suspect was six-foot two and a bastard!

    • Stan: Before we adjourn, let's recite the NGA Oath. Hold hands. Come on, it's not gay, there's guns in the room.

    • Roger: What the... Hey, that was my cookie!
      Steve: You snooze, you lose.
      Roger: "You snooze, you lose," huh? Hmm, okay. Eat up. (Narrows eyes) Eat... up.

    • Francine: Oh, sweetheart, don't be so dramatic. Besides, aren't you having fun cooking with mommy?
      Hayley: I'm not "cooking with mommy." Dad handcuffed me to the oven.

    • Roger: Did you save me a cookie?
      Francine: You bet I did. Last one.
      Roger: Oh, cookie, you look so good. Shh, shh, don't speak. I'll go get some milk for your bath.

    • Stan: Hey, son.
      Steve: Don't "son" me, baby-snatcher! (Knocks bookshelf on Stan)
      Stan: (Feels nothing due to being paraplegic) Somethin' on your mind, champ?
      Hayley: Steve, what are you doing?!
      Steve: Something we've both wanted to do for years, "sis." (Brings his sister into a passionate tongue-kiss, much to her dismay)
      Roger: (To a dazed Hayley) Oh, my God! Everything that happens from this point on is just gravy!

    • Roger: Hey, you're in my seat.
      Hayley: Sorry. Early bird gets the worm.
      Roger: "Early bird gets the worm," huh? Huh. Enjoy the seat. (Close-up to him narrowing his eyes) Enjoy... the seat.

    • Stan: (After getting shot) Hayley... tell Roger... he's annoying. (Collapses)

    • Hayley: Look, Dad, now that you can't work at the CIA, have you given any thought to what you want to do with your life?
      Stan: I sure have. I want to make a difference. I want to be an activist.
      Hayley: Really?! Oh, that's great, Dad! (Hugs him)
      Stan: Thanks, honey. Come on over here and give your dad a hug. (Briefly surprised, Hayley steps in front of Stan and gives him another hug)

    • Steve: These people aren't rich. Look at their house. It's a box!

    • Stan: (About the ride) You come out the exit wound! Whee!

    • Klaus: (After Francine smashes a wine bottle) Ugh, that's the worst thing to happen to wine since the movie "Sideways." (Looks to the camera) That's right, America. Come get me!

  • Notes

  • Allusions

    • Stan: (After he fires the gun above) Guns don't kill people, people kill people!
      Exact lines from the (2000) film, Romeo Must Die. DMX fires the gun above and says, "Guns don't kill people, people kill people!"

    • Episode Title: Stannie Get Your Gun
      This episode title is a spoof of the movie, Annie Get Your Gun. Which was based on the musical of the same name about Annie Oakley.