SCHEDULES N' THINGS ... Bones will return from hiatus on April 5 at 9pm, TVLine reports, replacing the outgoing The Finder. Only seven episodes remain in Bones' seventh season, which was cut short due to Emily Deschanel's pregnancy. However, there… more
The madder a cable network's viewers get, the higher its ratings, so it should be no surprise that last week's battle was our most contentious and ugly one yet! Congratulations to... Thanks to those of you commenters who offered level-headed… more
Somehow I managed to avoid ever seeing an episode of Fear Factor during its first run. It wasn't intentional, reallyI enjoy reality competitions, public humiliation, and binging on animal parts. But there are only so many hours in the day,… more
Even in the age of the DVR, as television addicts, we often let what's on TV dictate our day-to-day lives. It's scary to think that when network executives lay out the plans for their schedules, they're actually scheduling our lives,… more
What to watch on Wednesday, December 7... Aside from being cold, what are your evening plans? Might I suggest a selection of television shows to keep you company while you're cold? Voila: 9pm, ABC Modern Family In "Express Christmas," the… more
What to watch on Wednesday, November 23... Things just haven't been the same since you joined that dangerous street gang. I mean, sure, you've got the cool jacket and also a comb that flips open like a switchblade, but your… more
What to watch on Wednesday, November 16... According to your calendar it's Soup Organization Day, the one day a year in which you really get your canned soup stockpile alphabetized and organized. But underneath that, pencil in the following activity:… more
Holy crap, you guys! We made it! The week is over and maybe the world too, and we have so much stuff to talk about! So here's an extra long edition of all our weekly Swell vs. Hell roundup! Swell:… more
What to watch on Wednesday, November 9... What's an appropriate amount of time to spend searching for your family after they'd been teleported out of the dimension by an angry wizard? Four hours? Five? I feel like five is probably… more
Swell: The candy mountain we built after Halloween! Hell: The candy hangover we've been dealing with since we turned that mountain into a molehill. There's only one thing that will cure these blues... MORE CANDY! And our top choices for… more
What to watch on Wednesday, October 26... Tonight you should take a break from your all-popsicle-stick Detroit cityscape project and indulge in some new TV programming! (Your wife and child miss you, btw.) 10pm, FX American Horror Story In the… more
What to watch on Wednesday, October 19... It's taken you 19 years, but you've finally beaten all 96 levels of Super Mario World (including Star Road)!! Congrats, this is obviously huge, but now your children are grown and R.I.P all… more
We've done our duty and watched a ton of TV this week. So much to say! So here's us saying it! Swell: ... Parks and Rec's shout-out to Game of Thrones Ben is right, you know! ... The Secret Circle's… more
What to watch on Wednesday, October 5... Please take a break from the saxophone practice for a second YES, you are good at saxophone. YES, your saxophone playing is sensual and captivating. YES, the quiet storm has arrived. But listen… more
TODAY'S MOST IMPORTANT NEWS ... GLAAD, the Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation, has released its annual report on the representation of homosexual and transgender characters on television, and it appears as though TV is getting straighter. Last season, 3.9… more
What to watch on Wednesday, September 28... The only way tonight's television experience could get more exciting would be if you strapped the remote control to an agitated cat. Better catch that little feller! 8pm, CBS Survivor: South Pacific Now… more
When September hit, we hit back with our Everything Guide to the Fall 2011 TV Schedule. This week, we're catering to those of you without cable subscriptions and DVRs. That's rightthe tired, poor, huddled masses yearning to breathe free... from… more
What to watch on Wednesday, September 21... Hopefully your beer cozy is sturdy and reliable, because it's going to be a LONG night. (Helpful suggestion: Be sure to have a backup beer cozy handy in case of initial beer cozy… more
What to watch on Wednesday, September 14... It's time to take back your television from the cats. Tell them, "I paid for this television, cats! We will watch Wheel of Fortune later." Stay strong. You can do it. Sure, there… more
We recap episode four of Australia's Next Top Model Cycle 7. This week, the girls stood up in windows and laid around in coffins ... being a model is hard work. Out of Focus The girls get woken with a… more
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