Freddy: (hand is covered with cotton candy) Cotton candy? Jessica: No, thank you. Freddy: I wasn't offering it to you. I was introducing you.
Freddy: I want to show you something, but you must protect your eyes. (Hands dark glasses to Andy and disrobes) Don't take off the glasses yet, it isn't safe! (brief pause) Look at the light I give off. BEHOLD MY RADIANCE!
Jessica: My butt is going to go so tan people will mistake it for a football and pass it around.
Freddy: What's on your mind Andy, my right hand man-dy?
Wendy: We haven't seen you in over two weeks, other than that time you and Freddy rode those two gigantic women though the cafeteria.
Andy: What are you guys doing? I haven't changed, I'm the same guy I always was. Keith: Andy, you have a leopard. Andy: So what if I have a leopard? That doesn't mean I've changed, I mean, what? Do you guys hate leopards now? Maybe you're the ones that have changed!
Freddy: Have research make a dog that speaks Italian. They can either make the dog smarter or Italian easier.
Andy: Don't be afraid. Freddy: I'm not afraid. Andy: I was talking to myself.
Keith: We just think that making love in a public place is a very private matter.
Freddy: At least she died doing what she loves the most: committing suicide.
Mr. Pickering: In my day you could buy a murder with nothing more than tea and tap water.
Freddy: So what's on your agenda when you're not kissing my ass? Jessica: Actually I hadn't thought beyond that.
(After sniffing Andy.) Freddy: You've got a good honest smell. Like potatoes.
Jessica: Well, look who's back from Fantasy Island. Byron: Nice suit. Where'd ya get it, Fantasy Island? Jessica: Byron, that's what I just said. Byron: (still looking at Andy) Yeah, that's right!
Andy: It's a duct tape wedding! Cover your genitalia and run!
Freddy: There will be no lying, treachery or stealing. Wendy: Why did you look at me. Freddy: You're very pretty. Wendy: Yeah, but why did you look at me when you said stealing? Freddy: Maybe you stole your beauty from the rainbow. And some toner. Wendy: I didn't do either of those things. Freddy: You're very crafty. Anyone who uncovers a theft will be paid $1000, anyone caught covering up a theft will be fired immediately. (To Jessica) You, how did you feel when I told the thief she was pretty? Jessica: ...I'm just so very sorry about your mother.
Wendy: Yeah, well, maybe I would have liked to have ridden a giantess.
The French episode title is "Andy PDG", meaning "CEO Andy".
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