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Angel

Season 3 Episode 12

Provider

4
Aired Wednesday 9:00 PM Jan 21, 2002 on The WB
SUBMIT REVIEW

Episode Fan Reviews (13)

8.2
out of 10
Average
335 votes
  • Heroes for hire

    7.0
    PROVIDER



    The Good;

    Some great comedy and some excellent action, great payoff in the end (literally)



    The Bad;

    Not bad, just lightweight. Don't like the way they can't just come out and say 'gay lover' for Sam Ryan's friend. Wes and Gunn seem to take an awful lot of trouble defeating Brian.



    Best line:

    Justine (about the ice-pick through her hand) "Feeling something is better than feeling nothing" That girl has some SERIOUS damage deep inside and I'm not talking tissue.



    Jeez, how did they get away with that?

    See above



    Apocalypses: 5



    Angel Cliches

    Inverting the Hollywood cliche; the hero who is out for money



    In disguise; 8



    DB get's his shirt off; 12



    Cordy's tatt; 10



    Cheap Angel; the whole thing 8. Ironically CC who'd always been so mercenary now doesn't care about the money. Although she thinks that $50,000 is way up there on the list of cool things in the world.



    Fang Gang in bondage: Lorne and Fred tied up

    Cordy: 5

    Angel: 11

    Wes: 6

    Gunn; 3

    Lorne; 3

    Fred; 1



    Fang gang knocked out: Lorne

    Cordy: 11

    Angel: 14

    Wes: 5

    Doyle; 1

    Gunn; 1

    Lorne; 3



    Kills: Angel kills 7 vamps whilst Gunn and Wes take a demon each

    Cordy: 5 vamps, 3 demons

    Angel; 39 vamps, 52 and 1/2 demons, 7 humans

    Doyle; 1 vamp

    Wes; 11 demons+3 vamps, 2 humans

    Kate; 3 vamps

    Faith; 16 vamps, 6 demons, 3 humans.

    Gunn; 8 vamps+ 8 demons.



    Fang Gang go evil:

    Cordy: 2

    Angel: 2

    Gunn; 1

    Wes; 1



    Alternate Fang Gang:

    Cordy: 2

    Angel: 8



    Characters killed:

    45



    Recurring characters killed;

    8;



    Total number of Angel Investigations:

    5, Angel, Cordy, Wes, Gunn and Fred



    Angel Investigations shot:

    Angel: 11

    Wes; 1



    Packing heat;

    Wes; 5

    Doyle; 1

    Angel; 1

    Gunn; 1



    Notches on Fang Gang bedpost:

    Cordy: 3 ?+Wilson/Hacksaw Beast+Phantom Dennis

    Angel: 5; Buffy, Darla and The Transcending Furies

    Wes; 2; Virginia and the bleached blonde



    Kinky dinky:

    Allie misses the sex from her dead boyfriend and seems to be open to necrophilia. In a dark scene in an otherwise lightweight ep Justine and Holtz play some serious S&M games. Tying your hair in pigtails and having your boyfriend play the stern headmaster is one thing, sticking icepicks through the hand and consenting not to take it out as a trust exercise quite another! Brian seems to think that Allie is dating both Gunn and Wes at the same time. Fred thinks they want her to marry the Prince



    Captain Subtext;

    The Wes/Gunn/Fred love triangle becomes apparent. Obvious gay subtext between Sam Ryan and his 'friend'. He also notices that Angel is quaffed. Lorne says he never knew the demons intimately. CC and Angel lying on the bed with Connor together at the end, a perfect little family.



    Know the face, different character; 3



    Parking garages;

    5,



    Buffy characters on Angel; 16

    Wetherby, Collins and Smith. Angel, Cordy, Oz, Spike, Buffy, Wes, Faith, Darla, Dru, The Master, Anne, Willow and Harmony



    Questions and observations;

    Obvious Monty Python gag. Angel comments that 'We may have to incorporate' which is what they do in season 5. Eric Bruskotter who plays Brian was in one of my favourite shows Tour of Duty, you can also see him in Starship Troopers, Hamburger Hill and Crimson Tide. Jeffery Dean Morgan as well as appearing in Supernatural and Watchmen was in my favourite erotic thriller ever, Undercover Heat (which I'm sure he's taken off his CV). He's also another Buffy/Angel alumni who turns up in Eliza Dushku's series Tru Calling in the gambling ep.

    Angel's arrival is very Batman.

    Marks out of 10; 7/10, fun comedy ep

  • Provider

    8.5
    Provider was a really good episode of Angel. It was very entertaining and had some good points for the gang and Angel to consider. There was definitely some character growth in this episode. I think this episode had a good story and lesson not to spread yourself so thin you can't take care of yourself or your family. There was a lot of action, suspense, mystery, and the supernatural. I enjoyed watching this episode and it really did a great job of story telling and Fred is really starting to shine. I enjoy watching Gunn and Wes competing for her, and Angel and Cordy growing closer together. I can't wait to see what happens next!!!!!!!
  • So dull!

    3.0
    Is anyone interested in anything that happens in this episode? Are we really scared that Fred is in danger? Everyone's acting out of character. It seems like this episode was a bunch of stories they couldn't work into full episodes. Feels like it was thrown together in about five minutes.

    They couldn't even come up with a good premise to suddenly have so many customers. Why don't they continue to have such a flood of customers? Did they take their "web site" down? Why not just have the millionaire show up and hand them some money if you need to explain how they stay afloat? Lame.
  • Angel gets greedy.

    7.9
    Provider is a so-so episode that's ultimately pointless but has a few good scenes that keep it from being bad. It feels somewhat chucked in and the plots were same old.

    None of the three main storylines here particularly interested me. The worst was probably Angel at the vampire's nest. It was just completely uninteresting and I really could have done without it. The Gunn/Wesley scenes with the zombie boyfriend were marginally better but still nothing great. The best was probably Fred and Lorne at the demon base which was pretty entertaining, though they also were pointless. Cordelia basically assumed the role of babysitter here and wasn't particularly necessary here- a shame considering her character was really excellent last week and this week was reduced to talking in a baby voice and trying to float. I loved the nice little family moments between her, Angel and Connor though and they really did feel like a mother and father. The end scene was just adorable and I don't usually like all that sappy stuff but this was great and made me think "awww". I really like the Cangel arc and am extremely annoyed they brought Groosalugg back just to prolong it until the end of the season.

    The Holtz and Justine scenes were completely and utterly pointless and felt tacked on to the episode. Why, in this completely random filler, did the writers decide that putting in a snippet of the main arc? It just jarred with the rest of the episode. In fact, this scene was pointless any way you look at it, it just really reinforced Justine's commitment to Holtz. They should have used it in Couplet, if anywhere. Thank God we didn't have to put up with Sahjhan though as then this episode would have annoyed me much more having to watch Jack Conley try to look remotely scary. Also some nice Fred love interest moments and it's obvious they're setting her up for a big romance with either Wesley or Gunn with Wesley seeming the obvious choice. However, I actually prefer Fred with Gunn. I can just picture the Fresley supporters choking with indignation right now :P Nah I liked Fred and Wes too but ONLY in S5- their scenes in S4 aggravated me no end.

    At least the demons all looked pretty convincing and we didn't have to put up with looking at an actor in bad makeup all episode. The demons were all pretty convincing looking and their speech was funny.

    Provider is a good, if ultimately skippable episode that doesn't see much running in the DVD player. You should watch it but if you really don't want to, don't worry- you're not missing much.
  • More like Avoider

    4.9
    Provider-Unprepared for the flood of business brought in by advertising, the Angel Investigations crew splits up to cover more ground -- and ends up being spread too thin for its own good. Fred is offered big bucks to solve a demonic puzzle; Angel takes a job from a high-paying businessman; and Gunn and Wesley protect a woman whose zombie ex-boyfriend is stalking her.

    A complete dull episode that just drags on doesn't interest at all. The episode is split into 3 or 4 storylines but neither are remotely interesing. We see Angel being greedy through most of the episode and fight some demons, Cordy pretty much babysits Connor, while Wes and Gunn fight off some girl's zombie boyfriend and Fred almost gets her head cut off...like she wouldn't get saved really. The only funny parts are Lorne communicating with those rich demons with their click clacking language and the Wesley and Gunn accidently knocking off the head of that demon. But everything else was just blah! Also, the Holtz and Justine scenes continue to bore me. All and All, so far the worst episode of this season that doesn't absolutely nothing interesing.
  • Angel turns into Dad-zilla. Everyone is running around trying to make money and Fred nearly loses her head.

    8.0
    Another rather average episode, and quite honestly Angel as a Dad is starting to get on my nerves. I know it's supposed to be ironic that the big tough guy is so in love with his baby son, but I'm getting tired of it. The cases they take to make money are on the silly side and there is too much of Holtz and Justine for me. My favorite scene is at the end when Angel is lying on the bed with Cordelia and Connor, as she is feeding him. There is definitely chemistry and attraction between them and she seems happy playing the role of the baby's mother.
  • Making money, finding Holtz, and helping people are our three number one priorities.

    8.0
    This is another season 3 episode that has a very intense 'family' vibe, in part due to Angel's son Connor. I loved this whole season for that specific reason and it was really just cemented with Connor's birth, once everyone on the planey stopped trying to kidnap him. However, priorities seem to take a back seat in this episode when Angel stretches everybody a bit to thin. He's so concerned with providing for Connor, which he should and it ofcourse such a sweet thing to see from Mr. Broody pants, that he sort of gets way to hung up on the money. Angel also seems to only be exceedingly interested in cases that will earn Angel. Inc. the big bucks forgetting his service to the powers and gets swindled in the process. Thanks to Angel's temporary bad judgment he also manages to land Wes and Gunn in a situation that they could have used his help with, though sheer luck (and some serious weirdness) got them out of it. And lands Lorne, Fred, Cordy and Connor in a trap. Yet somehow he gets to keep the boatload of cash from that situation, funny how things work out sometimes.
  • Angel learns money isnt everything

    7.5
    I really didn't enjoy this episode that much. Yes, Angel learns (another) valuable lesson in regards to his newborn son: Money cannot buy everything. He and the gang take on some ridiculous cases in the name of money and yeah, you guessed it, they find out the hardway that they *should* be working for the powers and not the moolah. There were a few good parts of the ep. Wes finding out Gunn is crushing on Fred just as much as he is was good to know. Watching Cordy try to talk Angel into *not* being out for the money was great, especially considering how she was in Season 1. Not a bad ep, just not a great one.
  • how to earn some quick cash

    6.6
    the worst episode of the season. dissapointing but not terrible. i loved the cordelia scenes with the baby and angel wanting to make money for his son. that was very sweet.

    some things are very funny! but some are very stupid and annoying! but this episode was not bad but could be so much better with a better story. i really liked the end when cordelia and angel are on the bed with the baby in the middle and now with a lot of cash. very sweet.
  • A bit more funny and silly than other episodes but, still very well written.

    10
    This episode is a perfect example of why this show is so great. Humor has always figured in on this show as was started on Buffy. If you took out this aspect, I don't think you'd have a great as a show overall. You gotta love the cell phone, voice mail comments after he takes out the last 4 vampires. The creator and writers balance everything out perfectly as the series continues. This episode shows Angel smiling the most we've seen him on this show or any Buffy episode. At the end we see Angel is still on track and knows money is NOT the top priority.
  • One of the most useless Angel episodes. big dissapointment. it had some funny parts and I liked Holtz/Justine's scenes but that wasn't enough. it had to many lame humour. but it's still good enough

    7.0
    Provider

    This episode is VERY disappointing. tit had some hilarious moments le the beginning. the end was quite pretty. and the baby is always cute and the best thing were the Holtz/Justine scenes. but in overall it was a poor episode. one of my least Angel episodes ever and brings down this awesome season. it's full of useless and unfunny stuff.

    cut to the office. Angel wants to save money and is busy searching for money. Fred put a site online and then they're life. they need to feed the baby. cut to a guy running from a demon and he calls but a pizza place answers the phone. and cut to the office. Fred noticed that they put on the wrong phone number.

    the credits start

    cut to the gang. Gunn and Wes are both falling in love with Fred. then Angel says they need to make money, find Holtz and help the helpless. then everyone starts to call them. they're a business. cut to Holtz and Justine. she has her hand with a knife on the table. he tells her to take it out when she wants. she says that feeling something is better than feeling nothing. and he says he'll be back and if she stays they will talk more. cut to all the customers on the office. a girl tells Gunn that her dead boyfriend is stalking her and other demons want Wes mind but they see Fred is smarter and they leave. the cut to Angel and he gives the baby to Cordy cause he has a case.

    cut to Angel arriving to a man and he gives him a job and 5 million and he will give more and when Angel leaves another man enters and that guy knocks him out. cut to Justine and Holtz. he takes the thing out and he wants her to find others like her and she hits him. cut to the office. Angel comes back and so does Lorne. then come the demons and ask Fred to go with them and Lorne is going to cause they pay them 50.000 dollars. cut to the girls house. Gunn and Wesley are there but they are both really in love with Fred. the girl's boyfriend is a zombie and attacked them as well.

    cut to Fred and Lorne going to solve the puzzle. then cut to Angel going to his place and kills vampires and then goes back to the man but there is another one and he says that the guy who gave Angel the job was fired a while ago and that the money on the paper is unofficial. and he said something about a tresure and Angel is all exited. cut to Fred solving more of the puzzle and Lorne has to vomit and then sees something that the demons want to sew Fred's head on the prince and then one knocks him out.

    cut to Cordy and the baby and she talks to him and that he's gonna have a weird life and that his dad is fighting for money and that she can float. cut to Angel going to the place and finds the guy but he doesn't have much money and he says there were 7 and Angel killed 3 so there are still 4. then cut to Cordy and she has the money and then a vision of killing Fred. cut to the guys being attacked by the zombie and the girl says she broke up with him cause he's suffocating her. cut to the zombie pouting and she goes to make up with him again and she was the one who killed him and they kiss again.

    cut to Angel and the vampires are trying to brake brake in and Angel wants the guy to pay him. cut to Cordy going to the demons with the money and the baby to ask fro Fred but Lorne threatened the demons and now they're gonna kill her. cut to Angel mad and they are attacked and Angel kills the vamps and gets called but he doesn't know how it works so that guy helps him a little out. cut to the gang and Cordy tries to kick a demon but it hurts and then Wes and Gunn kill the king and Angel comes and kills the others. then Angel says he got carried away and that the money isn't the most important and then they all grab the money cause they earned it. cut to the last scene with Angel, Cordy and the baby together talking about what to do with the money.

    Black Out
    ----------
    Best episode quotes:

    Cordelia: You are so cute! Yes, you are. You are just the best little boy in the whole world.
    Angel: How's my little man?
    Cordelia: Oh, he wonders where his father's been.
    Angel: Papa's got mouths to feed.
    Cordelia: Ah. I have a mouth, too. Always have had one. Kind of known for it and we've fed it fine for years. Yeah.

    Angel: Nice! I'd call me, wouldn't you?

    Wesley: Adorable.
    Gunn: So sweet.
    Wesley: I meant the baby.
    Gunn: I meant the hot mama.

    Angel: We can't afford any more mistakes. Making mistakes cost money, and making money right now is our number one priority. Hey, Lorne.
    Lorne: If this is about the baby formula that I snagged from the fridge last night - sorry. I was feeling a little peckish and it was that or a glass of pig's blood. By the way, baby formula and Kaluha? Not as bad as it sounds.
    Angel: Lorne, I need you to use your contacts to find out what Holtz is up to. He's out there somewhere. We can never forget that. Finding him is our number one priority.
    Gunn: I thought you said...
    Angel: Finding Holtz and making money are our two number one priorities.
    Cordelia: Ahum
    Angel: Helping the helpless, finding Holtz, and making money are out three number one priorities.

    Justine: You should be thanking me.
    Holtz: For disobeying an order?
    Justine: For dusting two vamps!
    Holtz: Two vampires from whom I had told you to walk away.
    Justine: Guess I misunderstood.
    Holtz: Which is why we're here.
    Justine: And speaking of here, would a couple of light bulbs and indoor plumbing kill you?
    Holtz: We are here to determine whether or not - you - have the commitment necessary for the work at hand.
    Justine: At hand? -That's a joke, right?
    Holtz: Why are you wasting my time?
    Justine: What do you want from me?
    Holtz: I just told you: commitment. Something you must now convince me you have. So I've explained why I'm doing this. Why are you?
    Justine: Let's just say, feeling something - is better than feeling nothing.
    Holtz: Take it out any time you like. If you're still here when I return, we'll consider the next phase of our - partnership.

    Fred: Sure. These are puzzle people. Did you notice the designs on their tunics? Geometric shapes. Each a prime number, if you count their edges, arranged in ascending order of exponential accumulation.
    Wesley: Yes, I did - not - notice that at all.

    Justine: Decided to stick around.
    Holtz: You asked me what I wanted from you. I want you to go out and find others like you. People who have suffered as we have, people with the same rage, the same fire. You'll know them when you see them. Their eyes - will look like this feels. Are we clear? Have we learned our lessons, Justine?
    Justine: We're clear. You son of a bitch.

    Angel: You game?
    Fred: Sure.
    Angel: You'll have to go with her to translate. Tell 'em it won't be cheap. They're getting two of our top employees. That's salary, per diem, overtime...
    Lorne: Okay, okay. They apologize for their paltry offering and hope you'll accept Fifty thousand dollars!?!
    Angel: Fifty...
    Cordelia: ...thousand...
    Fred: ...Dollars?
    Angel: We accept.

    Ally: You know, I consider myself independent and it's hard for me to ask for help, but - it really feels good for you guys to be in the house. You know that woman you work with was right. You inspire confidence.
    Wesley: Which woman?
    Ally: Brunette, really cute, Texan maybe?
    Gunn/Wesley: Fred!
    Gunn: Fred. Said I inspire confidence.
    Wesley: Actually, I-I believe the comment was directed at me.
    Gunn: Really? 'cause I don't think so.
    Ally: Here, this is Brian. Not exactly a rocket scientist, but, ah, he's so sweet. You ever meet somebody and you just know that you belong together? It just feels...
    Gunn/Wesley: Comfortable.
    Wesley: You read all the same science journals.
    Gunn: You laugh at the same dumb jokes.
    Ally: And the sex. Oh, god, do I miss the sex.
    Gunn: Tell me about it.
    Wesley: Hmm.

    Lorne: I was feeling seasick when we were still on dry land. Do I look greener than usual?

    Fred: So. Causation. Corollary. Causatu Corollary. Are we talking a closed curve of finite length in a simply connected domain of zero? - That would be too easy, wouldn't it?
    Lorne: Oh, hors d'oeuvres. Oh, really I couldn't. I had eyeballs and insects for breakfast.

    Fred: There is a ascending and descending causation instantly proved by - that! I think I'm on to something here.
    Lorne: Yeah, me too. Unfortunately it requires a vomitorium.

    Cordelia: You're gonna discover there's a lot of cool things in this world. Fifty grand - way up there on the list.

    Brian: Ally, why won't you talk to me?
    Ally: Because you're dead. Now, go away!

    Ally: You know, this is so typical of you. You're all bluster and then you pout.
    Brian: I thought we had fun together.
    Ally: We did, but you're so - needy.
    Brian: Needy? Because I cared?
    Ally: Caring didn't entitle you to read my diary, follow me to work...
    Brian: I never... Okay, I read your diary once or twice. Does that give you a reason to poison me?
    Ally: What? You're gonna believe everything a zombie says?
    Wesley: Are you saying she killed you?
    Brian: I'd forgive her if she'd take me back.
    Gunn: You're kidding, right?
    Brian: No. Baby, I've seen the guys you've been going out with. You're not having any fun! Come on. Lets give it another shot. What do you say? Me and you?
    Ally: Eew, I-I can't. It's creepy.
    Brian: Come on. I miss you.
    Ally: Oh. I don't know. - Maybe I was a little - hasty.
    Wesley: Will that be cash or charge?

    Angel: Hello? Hello?!
    Sam: Hey - I think - I think that's your voice mail.
    Angel: Damn it.

    Cordelia: Lorne - do these guys have groins?
    Fred: Is that really important right now?
    Cordelia: Work with me here, kids.
    Lorne: I think so. I never knew one intimately.

    Angel: Guys, can I say something? Money's important but it - it isn't everything. - I got - I got carried away. - I just I never had a life that was totally dependent on me before. But that's no excuse ….Where was I?"
    Cordelia: Money's not the most important.
    Angel: No, it's not. What's - important is family - and the mission.
    Cordelia: They tried to cut Fred's head off. We earned every penny.
    Angel: Hold the baby.

    Cordelia: Go to sleep, my baby peep...I'm just saying a boat.
    Angel: No. College fund.
    Cordelia: Yes. College fund - and pay our bills - and put a down payment on a boat.
    Angel: We're not getting a boat.
    Cordelia: Hmm, they're fun.
    Angel: They're expensive. And when would I go on this boat, hmm?
    Cordelia: Moonlight sails. - Okay. - College fund - pay our bills - and rent a ski condo in Aspen.
    Angel: Ski condo?
    Cordelia: There's got to be some fun in our lives.
    Angel: Hmm - I like a ski condo.
    Cordelia: Sure. Snow. Trees. Chipmunk robots on ice...
    Angel: Chipmunk robots... - on ice...

    ----------
    Story: 6
    Acting: 8
    Writing: 7
    Picture: 8
    Gripping: 6
    My Rank: 7
    ----------
    Total: 7.0
  • One of the most useless Angel episodes. big dissapointment. it had some funny parts and I liked Holtz/Justine's scenes but that wasn't enough. it had to many lame humour. but it's still good enough.

    7.6
    Provider

    This episode is VERY disappointing. tit had some hilarious moments le the beginning. the end was quite pretty. and the baby is always cute and the best thing were the Holtz/Justine scenes. but in overall it was a poor episode. one of my least Angel episodes ever and brings down this awesome season. it's full of useless and unfunny stuff.

    cut to the office. Angel wants to save money and is busy searching for money. Fred put a site online and then they're life. they need to feed the baby. cut to a guy running from a demon and he calls but a pizza place answers the phone. and cut to the office. Fred noticed that they put on the wrong phone number.

    the credits start

    cut to the gang. Gunn and Wes are both falling in love with Fred. then Angel says they need to make money, find Holtz and help the helpless. then everyone starts to call them. they're a business. cut to Holtz and Justine. she has her hand with a knife on the table. he tells her to take it out when she wants. she says that feeling something is better than feeling nothing. and he says he'll be back and if she stays they will talk more. cut to all the customers on the office. a girl tells Gunn that her dead boyfriend is stalking her and other demons want Wes mind but they see Fred is smarter and they leave. the cut to Angel and he gives the baby to Cordy cause he has a case.

    cut to Angel arriving to a man and he gives him a job and 5 million and he will give more and when Angel leaves another man enters and that guy knocks him out. cut to Justine and Holtz. he takes the thing out and he wants her to find others like her and she hits him. cut to the office. Angel comes back and so does Lorne. then come the demons and ask Fred to go with them and Lorne is going to cause they pay them 50.000 dollars. cut to the girls house. Gunn and Wesley are there but they are both really in love with Fred. the girl's boyfriend is a zombie and attacked them as well.

    cut to Fred and Lorne going to solve the puzzle. then cut to Angel going to his place and kills vampires and then goes back to the man but there is another one and he says that the guy who gave Angel the job was fired a while ago and that the money on the paper is unofficial. and he said something about a tresure and Angel is all exited. cut to Fred solving more of the puzzle and Lorne has to vomit and then sees something that the demons want to sew Fred's head on the prince and then one knocks him out.

    cut to Cordy and the baby and she talks to him and that he's gonna have a weird life and that his dad is fighting for money and that she can float. cut to Angel going to the place and finds the guy but he doesn't have much money and he says there were 7 and Angel killed 3 so there are still 4. then cut to Cordy and she has the money and then a vision of killing Fred. cut to the guys being attacked by the zombie and the girl says she broke up with him cause he's suffocating her. cut to the zombie pouting and she goes to make up with him again and she was the one who killed him and they kiss again.

    cut to Angel and the vampires are trying to brake brake in and Angel wants the guy to pay him. cut to Cordy going to the demons with the money and the baby to ask fro Fred but Lorne threatened the demons and now they're gonna kill her. cut to Angel mad and they are attacked and Angel kills the vamps and gets called but he doesn't know how it works so that guy helps him a little out. cut to the gang and Cordy tries to kick a demon but it hurts and then Wes and Gunn kill the king and Angel comes and kills the others. then Angel says he got carried away and that the money isn't the most important and then they all grab the money cause they earned it. cut to the last scene with Angel, Cordy and the baby together talking about what to do with the money.

    Black Out
    ----------
    Best episode quotes:

    Cordelia: You are so cute! Yes, you are. You are just the best little boy in the whole world.
    Angel: How's my little man?
    Cordelia: Oh, he wonders where his father's been.
    Angel: Papa's got mouths to feed.
    Cordelia: Ah. I have a mouth, too. Always have had one. Kind of known for it and we've fed it fine for years. Yeah.

    Angel: Nice! I'd call me, wouldn't you?

    Wesley: Adorable.
    Gunn: So sweet.
    Wesley: I meant the baby.
    Gunn: I meant the hot mama.

    Angel: We can't afford any more mistakes. Making mistakes cost money, and making money right now is our number one priority. Hey, Lorne.
    Lorne: If this is about the baby formula that I snagged from the fridge last night - sorry. I was feeling a little peckish and it was that or a glass of pig's blood. By the way, baby formula and Kaluha? Not as bad as it sounds.
    Angel: Lorne, I need you to use your contacts to find out what Holtz is up to. He's out there somewhere. We can never forget that. Finding him is our number one priority.
    Gunn: I thought you said...
    Angel: Finding Holtz and making money are our two number one priorities.
    Cordelia: Ahum
    Angel: Helping the helpless, finding Holtz, and making money are out three number one priorities.

    Justine: You should be thanking me.
    Holtz: For disobeying an order?
    Justine: For dusting two vamps!
    Holtz: Two vampires from whom I had told you to walk away.
    Justine: Guess I misunderstood.
    Holtz: Which is why we're here.
    Justine: And speaking of here, would a couple of light bulbs and indoor plumbing kill you?
    Holtz: We are here to determine whether or not - you - have the commitment necessary for the work at hand.
    Justine: At hand? -That's a joke, right?
    Holtz: Why are you wasting my time?
    Justine: What do you want from me?
    Holtz: I just told you: commitment. Something you must now convince me you have. So I've explained why I'm doing this. Why are you?
    Justine: Let's just say, feeling something - is better than feeling nothing.
    Holtz: Take it out any time you like. If you're still here when I return, we'll consider the next phase of our - partnership.

    Fred: Sure. These are puzzle people. Did you notice the designs on their tunics? Geometric shapes. Each a prime number, if you count their edges, arranged in ascending order of exponential accumulation.
    Wesley: Yes, I did - not - notice that at all.

    Justine: Decided to stick around.
    Holtz: You asked me what I wanted from you. I want you to go out and find others like you. People who have suffered as we have, people with the same rage, the same fire. You'll know them when you see them. Their eyes - will look like this feels. Are we clear? Have we learned our lessons, Justine?
    Justine: We're clear. You son of a bitch.

    Angel: You game?
    Fred: Sure.
    Angel: You'll have to go with her to translate. Tell 'em it won't be cheap. They're getting two of our top employees. That's salary, per diem, overtime...
    Lorne: Okay, okay. They apologize for their paltry offering and hope you'll accept Fifty thousand dollars!?!
    Angel: Fifty...
    Cordelia: ...thousand...
    Fred: ...Dollars?
    Angel: We accept.

    Ally: You know, I consider myself independent and it's hard for me to ask for help, but - it really feels good for you guys to be in the house. You know that woman you work with was right. You inspire confidence.
    Wesley: Which woman?
    Ally: Brunette, really cute, Texan maybe?
    Gunn/Wesley: Fred!
    Gunn: Fred. Said I inspire confidence.
    Wesley: Actually, I-I believe the comment was directed at me.
    Gunn: Really? 'cause I don't think so.
    Ally: Here, this is Brian. Not exactly a rocket scientist, but, ah, he's so sweet. You ever meet somebody and you just know that you belong together? It just feels...
    Gunn/Wesley: Comfortable.
    Wesley: You read all the same science journals.
    Gunn: You laugh at the same dumb jokes.
    Ally: And the sex. Oh, god, do I miss the sex.
    Gunn: Tell me about it.
    Wesley: Hmm.

    Lorne: I was feeling seasick when we were still on dry land. Do I look greener than usual?

    Fred: So. Causation. Corollary. Causatu Corollary. Are we talking a closed curve of finite length in a simply connected domain of zero? - That would be too easy, wouldn't it?
    Lorne: Oh, hors d'oeuvres. Oh, really I couldn't. I had eyeballs and insects for breakfast.

    Fred: There is a ascending and descending causation instantly proved by - that! I think I'm on to something here.
    Lorne: Yeah, me too. Unfortunately it requires a vomitorium.

    Cordelia: You're gonna discover there's a lot of cool things in this world. Fifty grand - way up there on the list.

    Brian: Ally, why won't you talk to me?
    Ally: Because you're dead. Now, go away!

    Ally: You know, this is so typical of you. You're all bluster and then you pout.
    Brian: I thought we had fun together.
    Ally: We did, but you're so - needy.
    Brian: Needy? Because I cared?
    Ally: Caring didn't entitle you to read my diary, follow me to work...
    Brian: I never... Okay, I read your diary once or twice. Does that give you a reason to poison me?
    Ally: What? You're gonna believe everything a zombie says?
    Wesley: Are you saying she killed you?
    Brian: I'd forgive her if she'd take me back.
    Gunn: You're kidding, right?
    Brian: No. Baby, I've seen the guys you've been going out with. You're not having any fun! Come on. Lets give it another shot. What do you say? Me and you?
    Ally: Eew, I-I can't. It's creepy.
    Brian: Come on. I miss you.
    Ally: Oh. I don't know. - Maybe I was a little - hasty.
    Wesley: Will that be cash or charge?

    Angel: Hello? Hello?!
    Sam: Hey - I think - I think that's your voice mail.
    Angel: Damn it.

    Cordelia: Lorne - do these guys have groins?
    Fred: Is that really important right now?
    Cordelia: Work with me here, kids.
    Lorne: I think so. I never knew one intimately.

    Angel: Guys, can I say something? Money's important but it - it isn't everything. - I got - I got carried away. - I just I never had a life that was totally dependent on me before. But that's no excuse ….Where was I?"
    Cordelia: Money's not the most important.
    Angel: No, it's not. What's - important is family - and the mission.
    Cordelia: They tried to cut Fred's head off. We earned every penny.
    Angel: Hold the baby.

    Cordelia: Go to sleep, my baby peep...I'm just saying a boat.
    Angel: No. College fund.
    Cordelia: Yes. College fund - and pay our bills - and put a down payment on a boat.
    Angel: We're not getting a boat.
    Cordelia: Hmm, they're fun.
    Angel: They're expensive. And when would I go on this boat, hmm?
    Cordelia: Moonlight sails. - Okay. - College fund - pay our bills - and rent a ski condo in Aspen.
    Angel: Ski condo?
    Cordelia: There's got to be some fun in our lives.
    Angel: Hmm - I like a ski condo.
    Cordelia: Sure. Snow. Trees. Chipmunk robots on ice...
    Angel: Chipmunk robots... - on ice...

    ----------
    Story: 6
    Acting: 8
    Writing: 7
    Picture: 8
    Gripping: 6
    My Rank: 7
    ----------
    Total: 7.0
  • One of the most useless Angel episodes. big dissapointment. it had some funny parts and I liked Holtz/Justine's scenes but that wasn't enough. it had to many lame humour. but it's still good enough.

    7.6
    Provider

    This episode is VERY disappointing. tit had some hilarious moments le the beginning. the end was quite pretty. and the baby is always cute and the best thing were the Holtz/Justine scenes. but in overall it was a poor episode. one of my least Angel episodes ever and brings down this awesome season. it's full of useless and unfunny stuff.

    cut to the office. Angel wants to save money and is busy searching for money. Fred put a site online and then they're life. they need to feed the baby. cut to a guy running from a demon and he calls but a pizza place answers the phone. and cut to the office. Fred noticed that they put on the wrong phone number.

    the credits start

    cut to the gang. Gunn and Wes are both falling in love with Fred. then Angel says they need to make money, find Holtz and help the helpless. then everyone starts to call them. they're a business. cut to Holtz and Justine. she has her hand with a knife on the table. he tells her to take it out when she wants. she says that feeling something is better than feeling nothing. and he says he'll be back and if she stays they will talk more. cut to all the customers on the office. a girl tells Gunn that her dead boyfriend is stalking her and other demons want Wes mind but they see Fred is smarter and they leave. the cut to Angel and he gives the baby to Cordy cause he has a case.

    cut to Angel arriving to a man and he gives him a job and 5 million and he will give more and when Angel leaves another man enters and that guy knocks him out. cut to Justine and Holtz. he takes the thing out and he wants her to find others like her and she hits him. cut to the office. Angel comes back and so does Lorne. then come the demons and ask Fred to go with them and Lorne is going to cause they pay them 50.000 dollars. cut to the girls house. Gunn and Wesley are there but they are both really in love with Fred. the girl's boyfriend is a zombie and attacked them as well.

    cut to Fred and Lorne going to solve the puzzle. then cut to Angel going to his place and kills vampires and then goes back to the man but there is another one and he says that the guy who gave Angel the job was fired a while ago and that the money on the paper is unofficial. and he said something about a tresure and Angel is all exited. cut to Fred solving more of the puzzle and Lorne has to vomit and then sees something that the demons want to sew Fred's head on the prince and then one knocks him out.

    cut to Cordy and the baby and she talks to him and that he's gonna have a weird life and that his dad is fighting for money and that she can float. cut to Angel going to the place and finds the guy but he doesn't have much money and he says there were 7 and Angel killed 3 so there are still 4. then cut to Cordy and she has the money and then a vision of killing Fred. cut to the guys being attacked by the zombie and the girl says she broke up with him cause he's suffocating her. cut to the zombie pouting and she goes to make up with him again and she was the one who killed him and they kiss again.

    cut to Angel and the vampires are trying to brake brake in and Angel wants the guy to pay him. cut to Cordy going to the demons with the money and the baby to ask fro Fred but Lorne threatened the demons and now they're gonna kill her. cut to Angel mad and they are attacked and Angel kills the vamps and gets called but he doesn't know how it works so that guy helps him a little out. cut to the gang and Cordy tries to kick a demon but it hurts and then Wes and Gunn kill the king and Angel comes and kills the others. then Angel says he got carried away and that the money isn't the most important and then they all grab the money cause they earned it. cut to the last scene with Angel, Cordy and the baby together talking about what to do with the money.

    Black Out
    ----------
    Best episode quotes:

    Cordelia: You are so cute! Yes, you are. You are just the best little boy in the whole world.
    Angel: How's my little man?
    Cordelia: Oh, he wonders where his father's been.
    Angel: Papa's got mouths to feed.
    Cordelia: Ah. I have a mouth, too. Always have had one. Kind of known for it and we've fed it fine for years. Yeah.

    Angel: Nice! I'd call me, wouldn't you?

    Wesley: Adorable.
    Gunn: So sweet.
    Wesley: I meant the baby.
    Gunn: I meant the hot mama.

    Angel: We can't afford any more mistakes. Making mistakes cost money, and making money right now is our number one priority. Hey, Lorne.
    Lorne: If this is about the baby formula that I snagged from the fridge last night - sorry. I was feeling a little peckish and it was that or a glass of pig's blood. By the way, baby formula and Kaluha? Not as bad as it sounds.
    Angel: Lorne, I need you to use your contacts to find out what Holtz is up to. He's out there somewhere. We can never forget that. Finding him is our number one priority.
    Gunn: I thought you said...
    Angel: Finding Holtz and making money are our two number one priorities.
    Cordelia: Ahum
    Angel: Helping the helpless, finding Holtz, and making money are out three number one priorities.

    Justine: You should be thanking me.
    Holtz: For disobeying an order?
    Justine: For dusting two vamps!
    Holtz: Two vampires from whom I had told you to walk away.
    Justine: Guess I misunderstood.
    Holtz: Which is why we're here.
    Justine: And speaking of here, would a couple of light bulbs and indoor plumbing kill you?
    Holtz: We are here to determine whether or not - you - have the commitment necessary for the work at hand.
    Justine: At hand? -That's a joke, right?
    Holtz: Why are you wasting my time?
    Justine: What do you want from me?
    Holtz: I just told you: commitment. Something you must now convince me you have. So I've explained why I'm doing this. Why are you?
    Justine: Let's just say, feeling something - is better than feeling nothing.
    Holtz: Take it out any time you like. If you're still here when I return, we'll consider the next phase of our - partnership.

    Fred: Sure. These are puzzle people. Did you notice the designs on their tunics? Geometric shapes. Each a prime number, if you count their edges, arranged in ascending order of exponential accumulation.
    Wesley: Yes, I did - not - notice that at all.

    Justine: Decided to stick around.
    Holtz: You asked me what I wanted from you. I want you to go out and find others like you. People who have suffered as we have, people with the same rage, the same fire. You'll know them when you see them. Their eyes - will look like this feels. Are we clear? Have we learned our lessons, Justine?
    Justine: We're clear. You son of a bitch.

    Angel: You game?
    Fred: Sure.
    Angel: You'll have to go with her to translate. Tell 'em it won't be cheap. They're getting two of our top employees. That's salary, per diem, overtime...
    Lorne: Okay, okay. They apologize for their paltry offering and hope you'll accept Fifty thousand dollars!?!
    Angel: Fifty...
    Cordelia: ...thousand...
    Fred: ...Dollars?
    Angel: We accept.

    Ally: You know, I consider myself independent and it's hard for me to ask for help, but - it really feels good for you guys to be in the house. You know that woman you work with was right. You inspire confidence.
    Wesley: Which woman?
    Ally: Brunette, really cute, Texan maybe?
    Gunn/Wesley: Fred!
    Gunn: Fred. Said I inspire confidence.
    Wesley: Actually, I-I believe the comment was directed at me.
    Gunn: Really? 'cause I don't think so.
    Ally: Here, this is Brian. Not exactly a rocket scientist, but, ah, he's so sweet. You ever meet somebody and you just know that you belong together? It just feels...
    Gunn/Wesley: Comfortable.
    Wesley: You read all the same science journals.
    Gunn: You laugh at the same dumb jokes.
    Ally: And the sex. Oh, god, do I miss the sex.
    Gunn: Tell me about it.
    Wesley: Hmm.

    Lorne: I was feeling seasick when we were still on dry land. Do I look greener than usual?

    Fred: So. Causation. Corollary. Causatu Corollary. Are we talking a closed curve of finite length in a simply connected domain of zero? - That would be too easy, wouldn't it?
    Lorne: Oh, hors d'oeuvres. Oh, really I couldn't. I had eyeballs and insects for breakfast.

    Fred: There is a ascending and descending causation instantly proved by - that! I think I'm on to something here.
    Lorne: Yeah, me too. Unfortunately it requires a vomitorium.

    Cordelia: You're gonna discover there's a lot of cool things in this world. Fifty grand - way up there on the list.

    Brian: Ally, why won't you talk to me?
    Ally: Because you're dead. Now, go away!

    Ally: You know, this is so typical of you. You're all bluster and then you pout.
    Brian: I thought we had fun together.
    Ally: We did, but you're so - needy.
    Brian: Needy? Because I cared?
    Ally: Caring didn't entitle you to read my diary, follow me to work...
    Brian: I never... Okay, I read your diary once or twice. Does that give you a reason to poison me?
    Ally: What? You're gonna believe everything a zombie says?
    Wesley: Are you saying she killed you?
    Brian: I'd forgive her if she'd take me back.
    Gunn: You're kidding, right?
    Brian: No. Baby, I've seen the guys you've been going out with. You're not having any fun! Come on. Lets give it another shot. What do you say? Me and you?
    Ally: Eew, I-I can't. It's creepy.
    Brian: Come on. I miss you.
    Ally: Oh. I don't know. - Maybe I was a little - hasty.
    Wesley: Will that be cash or charge?

    Angel: Hello? Hello?!
    Sam: Hey - I think - I think that's your voice mail.
    Angel: Damn it.

    Cordelia: Lorne - do these guys have groins?
    Fred: Is that really important right now?
    Cordelia: Work with me here, kids.
    Lorne: I think so. I never knew one intimately.

    Angel: Guys, can I say something? Money's important but it - it isn't everything. - I got - I got carried away. - I just I never had a life that was totally dependent on me before. But that's no excuse ….Where was I?"
    Cordelia: Money's not the most important.
    Angel: No, it's not. What's - important is family - and the mission.
    Cordelia: They tried to cut Fred's head off. We earned every penny.
    Angel: Hold the baby.

    Cordelia: Go to sleep, my baby peep...I'm just saying a boat.
    Angel: No. College fund.
    Cordelia: Yes. College fund - and pay our bills - and put a down payment on a boat.
    Angel: We're not getting a boat.
    Cordelia: Hmm, they're fun.
    Angel: They're expensive. And when would I go on this boat, hmm?
    Cordelia: Moonlight sails. - Okay. - College fund - pay our bills - and rent a ski condo in Aspen.
    Angel: Ski condo?
    Cordelia: There's got to be some fun in our lives.
    Angel: Hmm - I like a ski condo.
    Cordelia: Sure. Snow. Trees. Chipmunk robots on ice...
    Angel: Chipmunk robots... - on ice...

    ----------
    Story: 6
    Acting: 8
    Writing: 7
    Picture: 8
    Gripping: 6
    My Rank: 7
    ----------
    Total: 7.0
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