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Carl: (Playing the sympathy card to win over Meatwad) Ever since my son was never conceived because I never had consensual sex without money involved, I always sort of looked at you as...kind of a thing that I could...live next to, in accordance with state laws.
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Frylock: You and a friend are going to the super bowl.
Meatwad: Well, don't that kick a little ass. Wait I ain't got no friends.
Shake: I'm your friend. I'm going to the super bowl with you.
Meatwad: We better hide them tickets.
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Meatwad: Meet my new friend Boxy Brown.
Shake: You mean your new gay friend.
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Shake: Uh! Well is that right?
Frylock: Yeah, that's right.
Master Shake: Well no one escapes from... the... Alcatraz!
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Frylock: Can I help you?
Master Shake: (With needle and IV cart) Ohh, you're not Mr. Jones, room 302. Where are my charts? No charts?! Somebody's fired! I'll be... I gotta fire someone. I'm just gonna shut the door behind me, you go back to bed, you trooper.
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Meatwad: How we doin' Carl? Is that pool heated yet?
Carl: Still kinda harpin' on that, huh? Well you know... this little area right here's pretty warm, ya know. Come on, hop in, pee wherever. I know ya do that.
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Carl: Get your meat ass out here and have some fun with me!
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Shake: (Meatwad enters the room) Hi! Little buddy! How's my favorite little man doing? Come here! Gimme a... stand by me!
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(Shake throws Meatwad directly into ceiling)
Meatwad: OW!
Shake: Whoops! I'm such a butterfingers!
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Shake: Don't play with my emotions. Who are you taking?
Carl: Yeah, who are you takin'?
Frylock: Carl, how'd you get in here?!?
Carl: The window, jackass! WHO ARE YOU TAKIN'?!?
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Boxy Brown: It was a hen hizzy.
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Shake: I don't feel good. (Passes out and begins coughing up chips)
Frylock: Carl, will you grab Shake's other hand? We need to get him to a clinic.
Carl: (While walking away) Yeah, sure. I'll do that.
Frylock: Uhh, Carl? Are you being sarcastic?
Carl: No. I'm not. (Leaves house)
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Shake: Whoo! Look who just got a mini-bike!
Meatwad: Look who just insulted me with this 10-horsepower piece of crap! You think I'm a child?!
Shake: Don't look at the streamers. Look at the frame! This is a man's bike!
Meatwad: Keep 'er cranked. Lemme go get my dolly.
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Carl: Something I need to say, ya know. Ever since my son was... never conceived because I never had consentual sex without money involved. I always sort of looked at you as... well, kind of a thing that I could, you know, live next to, in accordance to state law.
Meatwad: That's sweet, you're trying to say that you love me.
Carl: Whoa whoa whoa. Let's not put people on the spot. (Raises hand with foam finger) Who are you taking to that freakin' super bowl!?!?
Meatwad: Carl, your finger!
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Meatwad: Meet my new best friend, Boxy Brown.
Master Shake: Meet your new dead best friend!
Boxy Brown: Uh uh, fool. Step back.
Meatwad: You best listen to Boxy, now. He don't play.
Master Shake: Listen to what? He's imaginary, for Chri... You don't even like feetball, I'm the number one super fan!
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Meatwad: Yep, Super Bowls are fun. We got braggin' rights this year. Number One.
Shake: Who?
Meatwad: Number One.
Shake: Who's Number One?
Meatwad: I don't know...
Shake: You don't know, because you went to a f*cking farm, you f*cking imbecile!!! Get back here! You cost me my one chance! I've got f*cking diabetes and cancer because of you!
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Meatwad: Quick question here... is it zesty ranch flavored?
Frylock: No, it's bean flavored.
Meatwad: Yuck city, have fun eating it, because I'm eating this.
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Steve: (pops out Dr. Weird) Tah dah!
Dr. Weird: Wait for the drumroll!
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Meatwad: (referring to the tickets) I know, they didn't even want them. They just kinda pecked at us, like a bunch of chickens.
Boxy Brown: That's because they was chickens my man. It was a hen hizzy.
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Carl: I could turn that hose on, and you could sorta, you know, flip around in the sprinkler.
Meatwad: Yeah, that would be fun if I was stupid. Heat the whole pool.
-
Meatwad: Hey, Carl! How you doin'?
Carl: Hey-hey-hey-heyyy, just the man I wanna see there! I heard through the grapevine that someone won a big prize recently, huh?
Meatwad: Yep. I got two tickets to the Super Ball.
Carl: Naw... it's "bowl" - that's cute that you said that 'cause you's a frickin idiot.