Aqua Unit Patrol Squad 1

Meatwad: (Naming potential titles of horror films that Shake should star in) "Return of the Deadly Ass Face;" "Never Go Back to Ass Face Lake;" "Deadly Ass Face Lake Camp!"

Shake: I can hear you out there. Maybe I'll get a Benetton Ad where they'll look for freaks. Frylock goes into the room. Frylock: Shake, you're not a freak, okay? Carl walks by the window, looks into it, and sees Shake. Carl: (Turns to someone.) Take a look at the freak here! Frylock: I mean, yeah, you DO have a large pair of nostrils going down your back, and they're running. The nose on Shake's butt begins to spew out snot. Carl: Oh God, look at that! Frylock notices Carl jeering at Shake, goes over to the window, and pulls the shades down. Carl: Aww, Fryman! What're you doing to me here... Shake: Was he talking about me? Frylock: No, of course not. Carl: (Talking to someone behind the shades) Todd, you just missed it, it's a huge milkshake! Yeah, it's like a friggin'...

Meatwad: I mean, you could be a man or a woman… what are ya?

Meatwad: You got an ass-face, boy! Am I right? Frylock: Well, I guess you are right. Meatwad: I ain't talkin' to you. I'm talkin' to ass-face over here.

Shake: We need someone who wears shoes. And washes their hands. Meatwad: Don't you worry, now. I know me a guy. (Cut to Meatwad at Carl's doorstep) Meatwad: Hey, Carl. Carl: Hey yourself. Who's your friend over there… smells like, uh… almond joys? Shake: Hey! It's me! Shake! Carl: What, you get that done in Guatemala or somethin'? Shake: Get what done? Meatwad: Yeah, he did. We callin' in the pros now. Is your buddy outta prison yet? Carl: Which one? 'Cause there's three. Meatwad: Oh, you know which one. The guy that was in the hotel with the people… and the welding. Carl: Oh, Terry, yeah. Yeah, he's out. But, uh, part of his parole is he's not supposed to… you know, do what he was doin'… to flesh.

Dr. Weird: Gentlemen, behold! I have made love to this machine! Now, upon retrospect, I ask myself.... why? Steve: Wow... I'm sure someone finds that pretty neat. Was it for science? Dr. Weird: No! It was free! And she didn't know what was coming to her! (A robotic being pops out of lawnmower) My metal boy!

Shake: Why don't you go back to your ugly room and get on that chat with the girl you're afraid to meet in person! Frylock: You leave her out of this. Shake: And by the way, did you tell her you're a box of freakin fries?! Big bonus, you got a goatee. Yeah, that's in style.

Frylock: Well Shake, it's either the face or the ass. Shake: I choose... the ass!

Frylock: What did you say to him? Meatwad: Shhhhhhhhhhh, listen. You hear that? That's the sound of him not being here. Now you can thank me later.