Arrested Development

Lucille: Do you think enough time has passed to do Sonny and Cher? George-Michael: Who?

Michael: I think it's getting too risky keeping you up here. George, Sr.: You know what's risky? Letting your son go on that church thing. Michael: Her name is Ann, Dad, and he's not "going" on her, ok? They're just friends. George, Sr.: Not for long. They're making promises to each other. It's all that fidelity and pledging yourself to a woman garbage. I wine 'em and dine 'em, but I don't let them tell me what to do. (speaking to his dolls, arranged for a tea party) I don't let them tell me what to do. Michael: Ok, I should've never taken the pumps out of here.

Buster: My Army training tells me that this is going to be a hot mission. Michael: What? A hot mission? Buster: Yes. I create a diversion, and you grab George Michael and go. We need a name. Maybe "Operation Hot Mother."

Michael: Buster, you can't zip-line over there. Buster: Either I zip down, or he zips up, and that is a mighty long zipper on Mother's Cher jumpsuit. You have to get on your knees to start it. Michael: This is much less scary. Godspeed, Buster!

George, Sr.: If you play me, you got to play me like a man and not like some mincing little Polly or Nellie! I get those names confused. Apology. (to dolls) Apologies all around.

Tobias: What are you doing up here? George, Sr.: I'm having a f**king tea party, what does it look like I'm doing? (He shoves Tobias up against the wall with his hand against his mouth) George, Sr.: I'm living up here and if you tell anyone about this, I will f**king kill you. Ah, stop licking my hand, you horse's ass.

Barry: You really wanna settle this, now your job is to convince that "wife" of yours that you are willing to go in front of a judge and admit that you never had sex. Gob: She has a name Barry. You don't happen to know what it is by the way, do ya? Barry: That's why I want to settle...I'm not "super prepared". Gob: Well, we did have sex...and I'm not a great liar. Narrator: Both things he just said were lies.

Barry: You don't want to go in front of that judge. I caught him in a drag club. Gob: What were you doing there? Barry: Wow, you should be the lawyer.

Lucille: (to George Michael) Aren't you the sweetest thing, spending some time with what's left of your uncle?

Michael: You know, if that hand is still intact inside the seal, Buster's got a shot at a transplant. Gob: At the very least, we can get Buster's Swatch back, right?

Michael: Ok, that would be disgusting if you'd actually slept with her, but I don't think you did. Gob: I did and it was disgusting. Narrator: They didn't, but it would have been.

George, Sr.: (to the dolls) Now, who wants to take their top off?

Sailor Boy: Take me with you!

Buster: Can I open a can of soup for you? George Michael: Can it open a can? Buster: Can what open a can? Oh, God. George Michael: Oh, God.

Carl Weathers: I'm gonna go get a new soda. Hey, you know that you can get a refill on any drink you want here, and it's free? (laughs) Tobias: (laughs) It's a wonderful restaurant. Mmm! Narrator: It sure is.

Michael: Oh, no. What, Buster, for the first time ever, doesn't want to do this? Lucille: No, no, he does. It's just he's been so mopey. Michael: Well, that could have something to do with the fact that a seal ate his hand. Lucille: I don't know what it is. Michael: I think that's what it is. Lucille: Who knows? Narrator: It was that.

Dave Attell: (referring to Tobias) If that man is straight, then I am sober.

Maeby: Do you guys know where I can get one of those gold necklaces with a "T" on it? Michael: That's a cross. Maeby: Across from where?