Arrested Development

Gob: Taste the tears, Michael.

Michael: This here is way more important than me trying to find my father. Although, I was very close. I almost had Pop-pop in Reno. George Michael: Me, too.

Michael: So, where did you get this kid? Gob: Yeah, I guess I can tell you now. We were both waiting for our Dads at that garden where the little boy found the arm (Hands Michael the letter) Kid's amazing, though. It's almost like I wish he could be my Dad. (Michael finishes reading the letter) Michael: Ok, um, your Dad's not trying to find you. Your son is that kid. Your son ... you're the Dad. (points out the letter to Gob) Gob: I've made a huge tiny mistake.

Narrator: If Steve had a father, he would have warned him not to go into the woods with strange men, but he didn't. Steve Holt: Sure, let's go!

Steve Holt: You look familiar. Gob: I think that's because we actually kinda look alike.

Oscar: (in prison) I'm innocent, Michael. I'm Oscar! Dot com.

Gob: Well, I will tell you this, Michael. I don't have a son ... Narrator: He does. Gob: But if I ever do, I'm either gonna take him to the cabin in the woods. Or I'm gonna promise to take him and then not take him, but the one thing that I will never do is not tell him that I'm taking him to a cabin in the woods, and then not take him. Narrator: Gob was growing up.

Lucille: Apparently, mood altering medication leads to street drugs. That's what this very handsome young doctor said on The Today Show. Michael: That was Tom Cruise, the actor. Lucille: They said he was some kind of scientist.

Michael: Maybe you can bring a date to the cabin. Lucille: I don't want anybody to go inside that musty claptrap. Michael: ... Oh, the cabin!

(Driving to the cabin to escape Buster's snoring, Lucille discovers he's asleep in the back seat) Lucille: Ooh, come on! Buster: Mother? Lucille: What the hell are you doing back there? Buster: I decided to sleep in the car so my snoring wouldn't bother you. And I left that recording of my snoring so you wouldn't know I'm gone. Lucille: We're halfway to the cabin, I'm gonna drop you by this light.

(Tobias has just found a way to convince Lindsay that Kitty loves him) Tobias: If this tableau I recreate, perhaps I can resnare my mate! Narrator: Gee, why wouldn't she want him back?

(Michael arrives at the office where Lindsay rides up to him on a photocopier) Lindsay: We did it, Mikey! We're super rich again! And I'm gonna buy a car, the Volvo. (She hands him a piece of paper from the photocopier) Michael: N ... Lindsay, you're not going to start spending money. And this is not a Volvo. Lindsay: Oh, that's from sitting on the copier. (She grabs the sheet back)

Oscar: I even started a website: I'm Oscar dot com. I'm innocent, Michael! I'm Oscar! Dot com! Michael: No, no, don't buy it. I'm taking my son to the cabin, and there's nothing you can say to make me believe that you are not my father. Oscar: I understand. Your child comes first. Michael: Oh, my god, you're Oscar. Oscar: Dot com.

(Oscar pleading to Michael while in prison) Oscar: I'm your uncle. I'm your dad's twin brother. I'm Oscar, he switched on me! No one believes me. Narrator: Unfortunately, for Oscar, "You've got the wrong twin" was a popular alibi. (Cut to Oscar being dragged into the police station handcuffed) Man in Handcuffs: You simply got the wrong twin. Arrested Twin #1: We're quadruplets, you got the wrong two! Arrested Twin #2: We're Larry and Dave! Arrested Twin #1: You want Curtis and Jack!

Michael: Dad's in Reno, Kitty's in Reno, Dad's in Kitty and he must he a blue man.

Michael: Hey, why don't you pop a tent in front with your cousin Maeby? George Michael: What? No! Maeby: I'm not really the outdoorsy type. Michael: Well, this is a good chance for you to rub off on her.

Steve Holt: You wanna make out? Maeby: Sure, why not.

Narrator: Next, on Arrested Development...Maeby finds someone to help her forget her cousin: her cousin.

Michael: Uncle Oscar can last one more day in prison. Narrator: Not according to that day's blog at ImOscar.com.

Gob: (about his son, Steve Holt) He's like the father I never had.

Lucille: I just went off my post-partum depression medication. Michael: You're still taking that? You had Buster thirty-two years ago. Lucille: And that's how long I've been depressed about it.