Barney Miller

Barney: Anything happening I should know about? Everyone: Harris is writing a book. Barney: A capella. Pretty good. I had in mind something more in the nature of a crime. Yemana: The coffee. Barney: I would hesitate to call our coffee a crime. A shame maybe... (takes a sip of the coffee) Oh, that's a crime.

(Barney is trying to organize a rescue team for Mr. Gusik, who has escaped to the roof) Yemana: Barney... He jumped. Barney: Oh, my God. Was he killed? Yemana: Nope. He just flew all the way to the ground, sailing in a big circle. Just as pretty as anything you've ever saw. Landed right in front of the ambulance. Chano: What'd they do with him? Yemana They took him to Bellevue. Barney: I don't know what for.

Jeffers: Logical consequences are the scarecrows of fools and the beacons of wise men. Harris: This cat is dynamite. I'm going to write that down. Barney: It seems you found an admirer. Jeffers: Do me a favor—don't tell him it's from Aldous Huxley until after I leave.