Barney Miller

Kelly: Boney diaz, Chay-no. Chano: Jose Feliciano! Kelly: Pretty good, thanks.

Elizabeth: I got these steaks for $1.48 a pound. Barney: They must be factory seconds. Elizabeth: The secret is in knowing a butcher who's crazy about the way you walk. It brings special considerations. Barney: I've watched you walk. I've never given you any special considerations. Elizabeth: You don't think I walk for you the way I walk for a butcher.

Wojo: Hey, Barney? If a police officer loses his badge, does he report it to his superior or just wait til somebody turns it in? Barney: He reports it to his superior officer. Wojo: I lost my badge.

(former Det. Kelly enters wearing a patrolman's uniform) Chano: For an undercover cop that's a pretty dumb disguise.