Barney Miller

Season 2 Episode 15

Happy New Year

1
Aired Thursday 8:00 PM Jan 08, 1976 on ABC

Episode Recap

The detectives have to work the evening shift on New Year's Eve. Nick resolves not to make any more coffee in 1976 so he won't have to endure all the jibes from the others. Wojo comes in with a noisemaker, trying to keep everyone in a good mood. Chano comes in with a pickpocket, who laments how it is tougher to pick pockets anymore. Fish brings in the victim, who is too drunk to make a positive ID. They give him some coffee, but he wonders what's in it. Wojo and Nick go on a shoplifting call and Fish goes to talk to a jumper on the Mercantile Building who says he wants peace in the Middle East before midnight. Chano gives the pickpocket victim some aspirin from Fish's desk. Fish says the jumper wants to talk to Henry Kissinger so the Israelis can leave the Golan Heights. Fish suggests actually calling for Kissinger. Liz comes in to give the detectives some party hats and hors'dourves. She takes Barney into his office. The shoplifting suspect is a Hispanic woman who doesn't speak English so Chano tries to translate. Nick comes back and asks for coffee; Harris says Barney will have to make it. Liz gives Barney a bottle of champagne for midnight, but Barney says he can't because he would still be on duty. Wojo comes in and tells them that Miss Rodriguez, the shoplifter, is going into labor. Barney, Liz and Chano try to get her into Barney's office to make her more comfortable. They try to get a doctor, but one can't come for an hour. Fish can't get Kissinger, either. Barney tells Harris to call paramedics. Fish says someone for the Israeli consulate will talk to the jumper. The pickpocket victim has to have Jackson read the complaint to him. Chano says the shoplifter was stealing things for the baby and offers to pay for it, but the drugstore wants to press charges. Fish leaves to tell the jumper that Israel is leaving the Golan Heights because he can't get anyone to talk to him. Liz says the shoplifter is in labor. Harris gets an obstetrician, but the contractions are two minutes apart, so Barney gets instructions from the doctor on how to deliver a baby. However, no one wants to do it before the doctor arrives. But the baby comes sooner, so Barney organizes the detectives. Wojo volunteers to deliver the baby, because he did it one in Vietnam. Jackson insists on his victim pressing charges but he wants to let him go. Liz comes out to get some water and says Wojo is doing great. Chano says everything is fine despite the cries of the mother. Harris says that the hospital has an ambulance on the way. Jackson gets released when his victim refuses to press charges. Jackson says his New Year's resolution is to work another precinct. The baby arrives ahead of the paramedics. Liz says the baby is perfect and Wojo jokes, 'The kid ain't so bad, either.' Harris estimates it happened at 2 minutes after midnight. Fish returns, with the news that his jumper jumped. As the mother leaves, she says through Chano that she wants to name the baby after Wojo, but not after she hears his name. She gets out a 'Happy New Year!' in English as she leaves. Wojo tells Liz to tell Miss Rodriguez to name him Stan. Liz leaves with the baby and Barney pops the bottle of champagne. Later, Chano says the year has to be all downhill, and Nick adds that taxes aren't due till April. Barney offers to buy the detectives breakfast. Wojo says he can't eat eggs. Fish is telling his wife it isn't bad luck to kiss your spouse at midnight. Harris calls the Daily News to say that the baby was the first born in the city in the new year, but is shocked to hear it is third. Nick says, 'Story of my life.' Wojo gives one last blast on his noisemaker.

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