Barney Miller

Season 2 Episode 19

Massage Parlor

1
Aired Thursday 8:00 PM Feb 19, 1976 on ABC

Episode Recap

Barney receives complaints from local merchants about massage parlors and the illicit activity that may or may not be going on there. Several detectives go there undercover but nothing illegal happens. Wojo is upset that Wentworth paid for their dinner together. Fish returns from an undercover assignment at the massage parlor saying no one did anything to him. Wentworth volunteers to go on the next assignment. Barney says no until she says that there are ones that also cater to women. Wojo, feeling protective of his girlfriend, gets upset. She says he didn't get upset with Fish went. He says that's different because nothing could happen with him. A call comes in on a mugging and Barney sends out Harris and Chano. Harris says that after the massage parlor, everything seems mundane. Barney asks him if nothing really happened there. Fish says that Bernice used to give him massages. Nick asks what for and Fish says, 'My very words.' The mugging victim, a Mr. Fletcher, tells Harris and Chano says that the mugger was an elderly woman. Barney calls that refreshing. Chano can't believe Fletcher handed over his wallet when she had no weapon. Fletcher points at his black eye and says it wasn't without a fight, that the attacker used karate. Chano tells Barney that he doesn't believe it. Barney tells him to look for men dressed as elderly women as well as women with a history of violent behavior. Wentworth comes back saying she just got a massage; Wojo is happy at that. She does say she saw other women going through a door she thinks where the action was. She asks to go back and say that she will be specific on what she wants. Chano doesn't believe an old lady can inflict punishment, and Fish says, 'You've learned nothing from knowing me.' The next day, Fletcher comes back to look for his mugger. The detectives find three men who dress as women, but they are all not involved. Wentworth calls in saying she got solicited. Harris wonders how she pulled it off and Wojo says, 'Experience.' Wentworth comes in with a masseuse, saying that she can make the arrest stick. She tells Barney about what happened in his office. Barney has Wojo do the preliminary report. He wonders if the arrest can stick and Wentworth says she can. He tries to see her report but she doesn't let him. He tries to talk to Nick about it, but he says, 'I'm gonna wait for the movie!' The detectives bring in several elderly women as suspects in the mugging, one in particular is rather feisty. She asks Nick for coffee. The masseuse wonders what he did wrong. Wojo says some things people don't do for money. Wentworth says the masseuse has no priors. Fletcher comes back to identify his attacker. When the masseuse gets bailed out, he asks Wentworth out, and Wojo says she should find out how much he charges first. Fletcher positively identifies his attacker, but it turns out to be the cleaning lady, put in as a safety valve in case the case was a fake. Wentworth asks Wojo if he's still upset over her arrest; he says he just wants to know what happened and she teases him in the telling. He gets upset and she says she will tell him when they get alone. Fletcher leaves, but Chano has an idea. He does some karate moves and one of the women does karate moves back; this proves that she was the mugger. She is arrested and the others are sent home. The feisty one tries to proposition Fish and he says he has to take a raincheck 'till I'm no longer married, or dead, whichever comes first.' Wojo offers to take Wentworth to dinner, but she offers to wait for breakfast. Fish says seeing the mugger makes him appreciate Bernice more. Barney says he wound up with someone gentle, considerate, and attractive, but Fish says, 'Let's not get carried away.'