Batman

Riddler: At last, Boy wonder! Robin. You and the caped crusader both are set for the final bow.

(With slurred speech) Batman: Officers. Out of my way! They've got Robin. (Getting into the Bat-mobile) Get out of my way! I said. I've got to go after Robin. Officer: Hand me the key, Batman. I'm afraid you're in no condition to drive.

Molly: You shake a pretty mean cape, Batman.

Molly: Why is a quarrel like a bargain? Batman: Well, well. What master taught you to read? Molly: The answer is it takes two to make it.

Narrator: What foul trickery are the Riddler and his evil Mole Hill Mob are up to now?

Tattle: Watch them fish eggs, Molly. They're full of calories. You'll blow up like a balloon. Molly: Who cares? I'm hungry. Tattle: I care. Get fat, you won't be able to fit through the man-holes anymore. What use you gonna be?

Narrator: Meanwhile, in an abandoned subway tool room, deep under Gotham City, the secret headquarters of the infamous Mole Hill Mob.

Batman: What has neither flesh, bone, nor nail? Yet has four fingers and a thumb. Robin: (Looking at his glove) A glove, of course.

Batman: When is the time of a clock like the whistle of a train? Robin: When it's two to two?

Alfred: A million dollars. Bruce: It's not the money, Alfred. It's the idea of it. My identity revealed. My value as a secret crim fighter ended. Everything I've trained myself for since my parents were murdered.

Riddler: What is it that no man wants to have but no man wants to lose? Robin: A lawsuit. Riddler: Correct, Boy wonder!

Robin: There were three men in a boat with four cigarettes. How did they manage to smoke? Batman: (Looking at Robin) They throw one cigarette overboard and made the boat a cigarette lighter.

Mr. Peale: Batman. You've made a mistake. He didn't steel the cross. Robin: What? Mr. Peale: I tell you it belongs to him. He lent it it me for a show. Batman: But Mr. Peale. We saw him take it from you at gun point. Riddler: Gun point? (Grabs gun and light it, laughing) Robin: Holy ashtrays.

Robin: Gosh. If I could just figure out that riddle. Why can't I get it? Batman: Maybe your mind's on that cute little teenager who waved to you on the way across town.

The Riddler: (Laughing) This is a recording. Before you trip over your cape, Batman. Riddle me this. There are three men in a boat with for cigarettes but with no matches. How do they manage to smoke?

Batman: The Riddler controls his plots like artichokes. You have to strip off spiny leaves to reach the heart. Robin: The Riddler's mind is twisted. Crime's no fun for him unless it means outwitting us.

Batman: Why is an orange like a bell? Robin: (Snapping his fingers) Answer. Because they both must be peeled.

Bruce: Oh, there you are, Dick. Feel like a bit of fishing. Dick: (Coming down the steps) Holy barracuda! You mean. (Looking at Aunt Harriet) Sure, Bruce. Why not? Sounds swell doesn't it Aunt Harriet.

Bruce: Perhaps, if there had been anti-crime centers at the time we now propose when my parents were murdered by dastardly criminals.

Commissioner Gordon: I don't know who he is behind that mask of his, but I do know when we need him and we need him now!