Batman Gotham Knights

Joker: (looking at his plans while the phone rings) Boring. Lame. Not funny. Be done. Too Riddler. (finally answers the phone) What?! Harley? Where the heck have you been? Uh-huh, yeah, yeah, Batman eh? You don't say. You have who tied up where?!?

Harley: (about The Joker) He told me things. Secret things he never told anyone. Batman: Was it his line about the abusive father or the one about the run away mom? He's gained a lot of sympathy with that one. Harley: Stop it! You're making me confused. Batman: What was it he told that one parole officer? Oh yes. "There was only one time I ever saw Dad really happy. He took me to the ice show when I was seven." Harley: (starts to cry) Circus. He said it was the circus. Batman: He's got a million of them, Harley.

Joker: (talking to Harley about his childhood) There was only one time I ever saw Dad really happy. He took me to the circus when I was seven. I still remember the clowns, running around dropping their pants. My old man laughed so hard, I thought he'd bust a gut. So the very next night, I ran up to meet him with his best Sunday pants around my ankles. "Hi Dad, look at me". (Drops his pants) Zoop! I took a big pant fall and torn the crotch clean out if his pants. (Joker and Harley burst out laughing) And then he broke my nose. But hey, that's the downside of comedy. You're just getting shots from folks who just don't get the joke. Like my dad, (in an angry tone) or Batman.

Harley: (after spraying gas into Batman's face) That's a real gasser, huh Mr. J? Joker: I give the punchlines around here. Got it? Harley: Yes, sir.

Joker: Batman was right! That setup today was corny! Old hat! It's time I capped off our feud with his ultimate humiliation, followed by his deliciously delirious death. Harley: Why don't ya just shoot him? Joker: Just shoot him? Know this, my sweet. The death of Batman must be nothing less than a masterpiece! The triumph of my sheer comic genius over his ridiculous mask and gadgets!

Joker: Well, Batsy, it's been a hoot, as always. But I really must run. May the floss be with you!

Joker: I really have to apologize for the kid. No respect for tradition. What do you say we just forget the whole thing ever happened and do this some other time, 'kay? (walks away whistling) Then again... this is a rather rare opportunity. (pulls out gun on Batman) Well, you know what they say. A bat in the hound is worth two in the belfry. I guess you're going out on a laugh after all!