Beautiful People (UK)

Season 2 Episode 6

How I Got My Gash

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Aired Thursday 9:30 PM Dec 18, 2009 on BBC Two
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Episode Summary

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How I Got My Gash
AIRED:
Simon develops a crush on a new boy at school, but when he gets bullied by his classmates, he decides to runaway. Meanwhile Debbie gets her chance at an acting job in a crime reconstruction when she bears the resemblance of a missing woman. Ashlene gives birth and the paternity of her baby's daddy is finally revealed.moreless

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SUBMIT REVIEW
    Olivia Colman

    Olivia Colman

    Jane Rowland

    Guest Star

    Richard J. Hunt

    Richard J. Hunt

    Fat Queen

    Guest Star

    Jonathan Harvey

    Jonathan Harvey

    Mr. Fentures

    Guest Star

    Tameka Empson

    Tameka Empson

    Johoyo

    Recurring Role

    Josh Handley

    Josh Handley

    Jayeson Jackson

    Recurring Role

    Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions

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    • TRIVIA (0)

    • QUOTES (7)

      • Hayley: Thought of any names, Ashlene?
        Ashlene: I quite like Puff Daddy Doonan.
        Andy: I like Andy.
        Jayeson: She can call him whatever she wants to.
        Andy: What's it got to do with you?
        Simon: Yeah. I don't even know why you're here, Jayeson.
        Debbie: That's Jayeson? Right!
        Kylie: Are you going to tell 'em or shall I?
        Ashlene: What you on about, gaylord?
        Kylie: He's the dad. He's Puff Daddy's daddy.
        Andy: You are joking.
        Jayeson: Simon, we're family now.
        Debbie: I don't now about that, sunshine
        (Debbie walks over and slaps Jayeson across the face)
        Andy: Debbie, what are you doing?
        Debbie: That is for taking advantage of my daughter's slutty nature.
        (Debbie slaps Jayeson with the back of her hand)
        That is making for me a grandma at a ridiculously young age. And this is for what you've done to my Simon.
        (Debbie punches Jayeson out with her fist while Simon happily claps)

      • (Breaking news on the television about the missing woman)
        Mrs. Rowland: Basically, I ran away. I tried to make a new life for myself. But when I saw that reconstruction, I just got very angry and felt I had to show the nation that I don't walk and talk like that. Yes, what I did was against the law, but what that actress did was criminal.
        Mr. Rowland: Come on, Jane.
        Mrs. Rowland: Oh, piss off, Tony. Why do you think I ran away in the first place?

      • Kylie: Girlfriend, we need to talk.
        Simon: How was she?
        Kylie: About as wooden was that.
        (Kylie knocks on door)
        Simon: Oh.
        Kylie: What's going on with you and Mickey?
        (Simon shrugs his shoulders)
        Kylie: I'm not blind.
        Hayley: I am!

      • Kylie: I hate them, girlfriend. I'd quite happy to drop the lot of them in a vat of boiling mascara.
        Simon: Mickey's all right.
        Kylie: He's a knob like the rest of them.
        Simon: He's not.
        Kylie: Oh, you're just like my mum.
        Simon: I'm not an over-dressed, over-made-up slut.
        Kylie: She kept going back to the same bloke that beat her up.
        Simon: What are you trying to say, Kylie?
        Kylie: Oh, wake up and smell the coffee, gifrlfriend.
        Simon: I am not your girlfriend, girlfriend.

      • (Thunder crashes)
        Hayley: Hmm.
        (Hayley licks her finger and sticks it in the air)
        Sounds like a storm's coming.
        Simon: It's a twister, Aunt Em!
        Hayley: I'm Aunty Hayley.
        (Simon sighs)
        Simon: It's from The Wizard of Oz.
        Debbie: I'd have been brilliant in that.
        Ashlene: What as? A pig-ugly Munchkin?

      • Adult Simon: The only upside to Mum's doppleganging qualities was it led to her first appearance on TV in a Crimewatch reconstruction as the missing lady.
        Debbie: Filming... that's what they call it when the film something. Filming went really well. I don't want to tempt fate, but, uh, is that a coffee cream I can smell? No, it's a BAFTA.

      • Simon: Mum?
        Debbie: Yes, lover?
        Simon: When you met Dad, did you know he was the one?
        Debbie: Yes. Our eyes met across a crowded soup kitchen, he took one look at me and he said...
        Ashlene: I just found these crabs in the back.
        (Hayley spits out her drink)
        Debbie: I'm dressing them for tea.
        Hayley: What in? Ponchos and pashmini?

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    • ALLUSIONS (0)

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