Beavis and Butt-Head

Butt-Head: (seeing a mangy dog in its cage) Uh... Come here, doggie.

Butt-head: Hey Beavis, are you thinking when I'm thinking? Beavis: Yeah, those dung beetles are pretty cool. Butt-head: Dumbass.

Narrator: We'll be right back with more the life cycle of the dung beetle, right after this. Butt-head: Dung. Beavis: DUNG!

Butt-head: Slow down, Spot.

Butt-head: He takes a dump in my house, I'm gonna kick his ass.

Dog pound worker: Now, you do know what a dog like this eats, don't you? Butt-head: Uh, garbage?

Announcer: (sniffing) What reeks in here? Oh right, it's this show -- stick around, Beavis & Butt-head will be back.

(Watching Grim Reaper video) Butt-head: "You know, maybe if they put more suck bands in prison, like... like people would like, you know, try to stay out of prison." Beavis: "Maybe it would have um, uh, a positive effect... on some... um generations of of the youth."

Dog pound worker: If your dog goes to the bathroom in the house, what do you do? Beavis: Rub his nose in it. Butt-head: Uh, I'd kick his ass. Beavis: Yeah, rub his nose in it, then kick his ass. Dog pound worker: No, you can't never hit your dog, no matter what he does.

Butt-head: Ugh, Beavis! You're not supposed to eat those!!

Beavis: Yeah, Grim Reaper's got that bloated face you get when you eat to many of those urinal mints. Butt-head: Uh, what are you talking about Beavis? Beavis: You know, those little mints they put in urinals so you can you know, brushen up after you take a leak.

Beavis: Hey Butthead, do you like seafood? Butthead: Yeah. *Beavis opens his mouth* Butthead: That joke only works if you have food in your mouth, dillhole.

Butt-head: Beavis, the test. Come here, dumbass. Beavis: Oh, yeah. Butt-head: Don't worry, dude. (dog licks Beavis) Beavis: Ah, dog germs! Butt-head: Uh, that answer was incorrect, the penalty is death.

(watching Nitzer Ebb video) Beavis: It was here that George Washington first chopped off his wiener... and then he lied.

(watching Moist video) Beavis: What kind of an accent is that? Butt-head: Uh, I think that's the way they talk in like Wussylvania.

Beavis: Bite! Bite! Bite everything!