Beavis and Butt-Head

Beavis: I wanna become a Republican -- that would rule. Butt-head: So then I think, once you become a Republican it's like, you don't score anymore. Beavis: Oh well, I guess I'll just keep being a Mexican then.

Beavis: (about why he wants to go to England) I just think like you know, since everybody's a wussy over there, you know, I could just go around and kick everybody's ass, and then you know, I could probably get some chicks, you know 'cause I'd be the only guy who's not a wussy. You know, that's what I was thinking. Butt-head: Uh, I think you'd probably even be a wussy, like you know, to them.

(watching Pink Floyd video) Butt-head: Oh no, is this Yanni? Uh, oh this is Pink Floyd. Beavis: Um, oh yeah, are they um, are they from England? Butt-head: Yeah, just another gang of wussies from England.

PTA Member: What I'm trying to point out Beavis, is that Mr. Van Driessen respects you, and treats you as an equal. He already is a fine example of the 'teacher as a friend.' Butt-head: Yeah, huh huh, he is a wuss.

Beavis: I'd like some tacos... and a chainsaw. That would be cool.

Butt-head: We need teachers who don't suck.

Announcer: Beavis weeps for the sorrows of mankind... and Butt-head smacks him -- next.

(at PTA meeting) Butt-head: We want like a teacher who's cool. Beavis: Yeah, uh, I just wanna say one thing too: um, someone who'll like um give us some beer... and some chicks.

(Butt-head's idea of a cool teacher) Teacher (old Butt-head): This sucks. Let's go get drunk.

Principal McVicker: (after Beavis and Butt-Head talk about Mr. Van Dressien) You see?! Are these the kind of kids you'd want? We need teachers who are not afraid to use discipline; Coach Buzzcut is an excellent example. Butt-Head: No way! Buzzcut's always screaming at us and kicking our asses. Beavis: Yeah. And once, he, um... he used to hit me, and he threw me into a locker, and then he kicked me... Principal McVicker: What?! You're lying! Well, that's nothing compared to what I'm going to do to you! Now get the hell out of here! Parent: Principal McVicker! It's completely unnecessary to talk to students that way! Principal McVicker: What?! Shut up! What do YOU know?! Parent: I think you're out of line! Principal McVicker: Out of line, my ass! Get out of my way, I'm going to kill them! (Principal McVicker gets in a fistfight with one of the parents as Beavis and Butt-Head watch the others beat him up.)