Becker: Can I have your attention please? I'm happy to report that I just quit smoking.
Margaret: You said you would never do that again as long as I was still alive.
Becker: Don't worry this time I know I can do it.
Margaret: You said that last time.
Becker: No really. This time I'm serious. I can make it.
Bob: You said that last time.
Becker: Hey, you know what? Screw you guys.
Reggie, Bob, Jake and Margaret: You said that last time.
Becker: I'll bet you a hundred bucks I don't touch a cigarette all day.
Margaret: I don't think he can last that long.
Reggie: I don't think he's got a hundred bucks!
Bob: Let me guess, Becker. Still a little low on vitamin smoke?
Bob: All of a sudden I start having that dream, the one we all have, you know, where you're making love to a woman and her legs turn into a pair of scissors.
Becker: Do you have a standing rib roast with garlic mashed potatoes?
Reggie: I've got a standing pot of water with some hot dogs floating in it.
Becker: Throw them away.
Margaret: Why don't you throw them away?
Reggie: Because throwing away anything he's already paid for would kill him faster than the cigarettes.
Margaret: Oh, it's rare to find this level of repartee. It's like PBS.
Bob: Yeah, without the P.
Becker (while smoking the cigarettes Margaret threw into the dumpster): God, I am just pathetic!
Jake: Don't try sneaking a smoke, cause I already talked to Margaret and Linda. I have eyes everywhere.
Becker: You don't have eyes anywhere.
Reggie (to Bob): If I found you in my bed, I know I'd hurl.
Second of the four episodes where Becker tries to quit smoking.