Best Week Ever

Miss Info: The whole point of [St. Patrick's Day] is to be able not to remember what happend on that day. Hence, the green beer.

Michael Colton: In The Simple Life 2 Paris [Hilton] and Nicole Richie are traveling across the country with no money. So they're essentially are going to be truck stop hookers.

Michael Colton: Farnsworth Bentley has the fakest name this side of porn.

Patton Oswalt: Shakira's ass simply goes out and raises awarness [for UNICEF]. Let me tell you I'm very aware.

Billy Merritt: The thing about the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame is that it's the largest AA meeting.