Bones

Angela: Don't use your brain so much, sweetie. You have other organs that can give you far more pleasure.

(Booth and Brennan in her office after having solved the case) Booth: Tell you something: the sales of your book are gonna skyrocket after this. Brennan: The only problem is, our ending is a lot better than the one I wrote in the book. Booth: What, are you kidding me? Huh? Kathy Reichs and the FBI guy in the back of the AMG? Brennan: (smiles) The arrest. Booth: Oh, yeah, there's that.

(Brennan has just stormed out of Booth's office upset over the copycat murders) Booth: She wasn't this emotional before you came in the picture. Sully: Ah, I thought you weren't interested. Booth: Ha! Right, look, I don't need that, ok? Believe me, ok? I'm gonna go and talk to Sadie Keller's husband and why don't you (pejoratively) go back to your office there and sort through the fan mail, right? Bye.

(Booth and Brennan at the marina) Booth: So, is it just me, or is this, you know, kinda weird? Brennan: What? Booth: In your new book, they found a body at the marina, right? Brennan: You read my book? Booth: Of course. A guy at the dock saw something floating in the water, thought it was a dead fish, ended up being a decomposed hand. A dive crew just located the rest of the body. Brennan: I didn't think you would have the time to read my book. Booth: You have time to write it, I have time to read it. Besides, you can't avoid the damn thing, your book's everywhere.

Sully: (To Booth and Brennan) Congratulations! You guys make a great team. Booth: That's true. (Looks at Brennan affectionately) So true.

Booth: You're gonna come at me like you came at Sully? Brennan: What is that supposed to mean? Booth: Look, far be it from me to stick my nose into your bedroom but I've known Sully a long time and believe me, he's one of the good guys. Brennan: I know Sully, Booth. Booth: Yeah, and I know you. Somebody gets too close you just wanna push them away.

Brennan: My partner, Seeley Booth, this is the publicist for my book, Ellen Laskow and her assistant Hank. Ellen Laskow: Hello! Now I see why Temperance writes those dirty little scenes in her books. Booth: That's not me. Brennan: It's not him. Booth: Not me, no. Ellen Laskow: Right. You must let me get you that therapist's number dear. Booth: Oh, no, seriously, she's got someone. Brennan: Booth! Booth: Oh, it's nothing to be ashamed of. I mean, he's kinda short.

Booth: Bones, don't try the psychological stuff. It's really not a pretty sight.

Hodgins: (of the rats) Don't grow too attached, these little guys are destined to be snake snacks. Angela: But now that we've confiscated them, shouldn't they be safe? I mean, they're material witnesses. Hodgins: It's not like they know sign language, Angela.

Brennan: I've been alone my whole life. It's all I know. Sully: Don't worry. You'll learn fast.

Hodgins: Love the symbolism of the red tape. Perfect way to dispose of bureaucrats.

Oliver: The dead bodies, is it true. Did they really get eaten up like in the book? Brennan: Yes, they did. Oliver: Some of the Brennanites were skeptical that the deaths were realistic. Booth: Did he say Brennanites? Brennan: Did you say Brennanites? Oliver: Murder mystery chat room members. See, all chat room members have to identify themselves with their favorite authors.

(Brennan's phone rings) Sully: Shhh. Let's pretend it's the ocean.

Hodgins: Be careful with fire ants. They're extremely dangerous. Zack: I think the victim would agree with you.

Hodgins: So, for kicks you read... Cam: Feminist trash. You know. Woman finds her power, leaves her oppressive husband, discovers freedom and fulfillment with an artist who knows how to cry and make love like an animal. Hodgins: So, sex books. Cam: (nods) Pretty much, yeah.

Hodgins: Do you really plan on reading Dr. Brennan's book? Cam: What? Of course. I only...I bought it...It's on a pile...I'm waiting...No, I don't.

Sully: I know what you're going through. Brennan: OK, what? What, Sully, what? What am I going through? Sully: OK. You feel responsible. You feel that somehow, if you didn't write that book, those two people would still be alive. And you're terrified 'cause you know that someone else dies in the book. Brennan: I don't put much credence in psychology. Sully: Yeah? Well, neither do I. I'm basing this on knowing you. Well. Knowing how much you care about your work. And if trivializing it in a book caused this then… it just– but it doesn't work like that, Tempe. Brennan: Statistically, the murders would have happened whether the book was written or not. The method might be different is all. Sully: Right, now if you only believed that. Brennan: You don't know me as well as you think. We're just having a fling, so don't get carried away. Sully: When you can't stop thinking about someone when they're not around, that's not a fling. When you remember their touch like they were still right next to you, that's not a fling. If you need to be alone with this, fine. But we both know what we have.

Hodgins: (seeing Brennan all dressed up for her book signing) Wow! New dress code? 'Cause I didn't get the memo.

Hodgins: Do you have any idea how tight a rat's rectum is? Angela: Please tell me you don't.

(After having found the first victim killed the way Brennan describes in her book) Booth: How are you holding up? Brennan: (defensively) What do you mean? Fine. Booth: You know, something like this, it's understandable if you're upset. Brennan: It's probably a coincidence. (Suddenly Sully walks in) Sully: Hey, how's it going? Brennan: What are you doing here? Booth: (slightly annoyed) Ah, yeah. Sully: I heard we had a copycat killer using your book. Brennan: That hasn't been established. Booth: Yeah, I got it covered here, Sully. Sully: Two hands are better than one, Booth. Booth: Well, last time I looked I have two hands, (holds up his hands) see? Thanks. Angela: Testosterone spill on aisle 4.

Booth: (shoots door) My shrink is gonna be pissed.

Ellen: You know your book is on the Best Sellers list. You don't have to work at this place anymore. Brennan: This is my real love, Ellen. Ellen: I know a therapist who can really help you.