Bones

Cam: Oh, God. Please tell me that is not ... Zack: That's not human. That's Spam. Hodgins: Which has been injected with a number of organic poisons. We'd like to introduce a colony of Artemia Salina. Zack: Commonly referred to as sea chimps. Hodgins: If they die, I can check to see if running them through the spectrometer reveals what poisoned them. Cam: What do you want from me? Zack: Permission. Cam: Why? Hodgins: Because you said you'd fire us if we did any more experiments without clearing them first. Cam: Boys, you've got Spam and sea chimps. You get anything out of that, and I will ... buy you each a car. Hodgins: Release the hounds. Zack: Why? Hodgins: Pour in the sea chimps. (Zack pours them in) Zack: I found that anticlimactic. Hodgins: Yeah.

Angela's Dad: (to Hodgins) You should play it in the key of G Demolished.

Christine Brennan: (From the videotape) Hi, Temperance, it's Mom, I don't know when or if you'll ever see this. I hope to put it in your hands myself, see you again, with my own eyes. This is a hard hard world, your father and I left you and Russ to save your lives. People would have killed you to get us. That's not what this is about. Today is your sixteenth birthday, I'm so sorry not to be there to tell you all the things that a mother should tell her daughter when she turns sixteen. And, I'm sorry not to give you this, it's an heirloom from my side of the family, and starting today it's yours. I don't know how long it will take me to get it to you, but I promise you I will. You're going to hear a lot of things about your parents, especially about your father. He is a good man. It was my insistence to leave you kids, Max would have kept us together, fought until the end, I'm not sure he'll ever forgive me for that. So please, Temperance, I need you to forgive me. And if you can't forgive me, I beg you honey, forgive your father, cause he is a very good man. Remember this, you were cherished in this world, adored. What I did to you may have been wrong, but I did it out of love. I did it out of love.

(Booth punches Max in the face during his "arrest") Max: Oh, hey, hey, that's good kid, you're throwin'. (punches Booth, who groans) What's the matter? Got a glass jaw? Booth: You know what, you talk too much. (punches Max) Max: Right in the face, geez. (doubled over) Time, time. Booth: You had enough? Max: Wait, I'm old. Booth: There's no time outs during an arrest! (Max gets up and punches Booth. Booth returns with two punches. Max falls to the ground.) Max: Okay, I'm done, I'm done. It's over. I'm finished. Booth: Let's go. (takes out the cuffs to arrest Max, who punches him in the groin) Booth: (in pain) Oh, God that really hurts. (falls to the ground next to Max)

Zack: Booth? Booth: Yeah? Zack: Is there any sense in ducking when someone shoots at you. Booth: Your body ducks whether you want to or not. (Suddenly figures out something is wrong) Why? Zack: You can read this later, then explain it to everyone. (Hands him a letter from the White House) Booth: Why me? Zack: You know more about duty and honor than anyone else I know. (Booth looks touched)

(Booth and Bones are walking down the aisle.) Booth: Listen. I, I'm sorry I had to arrest your father. Bones: We don't have to talk about that right now. You did what you had to do, I understand. Booth: Yeah, but ... (they arrive at the end of the aisle and separate to different sides) Bones. Bones: What? Booth: He could have gotten away. Bones: What? Booth: We got into a fight, you see, and your Dad could have escaped capture. Bones: So, he beat you in a fight. Booth: (starts walking towards her) No, I didn't say that. Bones: You beat him, but gave him a chance to get away. Booth: No, I didn't say that. (they're now standing close to each other, where the bride and groom are supposed to stand) Bones: Well, I don't see any other alternatives. Booth: No, Bones, your father chose to be arrested because he felt if he abandoned you again, he would lose you forever. (Bones looks at him with much emotion) Just thought you should know. Bones: (pauses, and then suddenly hugs Booth) Thanks Booth. Angela: Harrumph! Sorry. (Booth and Bones loosen their hug reluctantly and look at Angela without releasing each other) I'd like to get married now.

Booth: Am I gonna need to use my gun Max? Max: You got your piece of paper? Booth: Max Keenan I am placing you under arrest for the murder of Deputy Director- Max: Oh, fine, fine, sure, you know what you can take me, you're right, I'm not going to abandon her again. Booth: You're not gonna resist. Max: It's your lucky day I guess. Booth: Great. Max: No, no wait a minute, no, see, I'm wrong. I can't just go quietly, it's not my nature. Booth: Max, I got a gun. Max: I can't surrender, you're gonna have to shoot me. You understand? Booth: Not your nature? Max: No, maybe it's a character flaw, (Booth takes out his gun) Yeah, shoot me, shoot me, but in the leg please if you don't mind.

Hodgins: Right, Zack and I did a brief experiment involving sea chimps. Booth: Sea chimps? I love sea chimps. Bones: To confirm that they would feed on decomposing human tissue? (Hodgins nods) Booth: Great. Thanks for ruining the whole sea chimp thing for me.

Bones: He ran out on me, and Russ. He robbed people, he's a murderer. He got my mother killed. You know, how does he expect me to (she has a hard time finding words) ... Booth: It's hard to trust someone who's abandoned you. Especially a parent. Bones: Am I ... am I terrible for not, wanting to let myself care about my own father? Booth: Look, Bones, your father's going to do something tomorrow that's going to hurt you, how do you forgive that? Bones: I'm not a bad daughter? Bad person? Booth: (smiles at her reassuringly) You're not a bad anything.

Bones: Do you like your father? Booth: I love my father. Bones: I think I love my father. Booth: Well, that's normal.

Booth: (answers his phone) Booth. Hodgins: Dude, uh, will you stand up for me on Saturday. Booth: Against who? Hodgins: No, I mean, uh be my Best Man. Booth: Sure, wow. Hodgins: I know, big honor. Booth: No no no, yeah, that but you know, you didn't give me much time to put a bachelor party together. Hodgins: No bachelor party. Bones: (to Booth) Is that Hodgins? Booth: Yeah, he wants me to be his Best Man. (into the phone) Well, if there's no bachelor party, what do you want me to do? Hodgins: Stand there, make a toast, hand over the ring, tongue kiss the Maid of Honor at the reception when people clink glasses. Booth: Nice, excellent, okay, who's the Maid of Honor? Hodgins: No idea, but most of Angela's friends are really hot. Bones: Well, I'm the Maid of Honor, why? (Booth looks at her funny, slightly uncomfortable) Booth: (to Hodgins) Uh listen do you need me to connect with the bride's father, put together the uh, toast and speeches and all that ... Hodgins are you there? Hodgins: Angela's father, oh, I forgot all about him. (hangs up) Bones: She has AIDS. Booth: Angela?! Bones: Cynthia Cole.

Max: Your mother was the only family I ever knew, and you and Russ. Bones: You abandoned me, for fifteen years. Max: And I'll do whatever I can to make repairs. Bones: While running away from the F.B.I.? Max: I have more, a message, from your mother on videotape. Bones: Wh...what does she say? Max: I don't know, it's for you, when you're ready.

Hodgins: I'd like to ask you to be my best man on Saturday. Zack: Things aren't always either or, sometimes they're both. Hodgins: At my wedding. Saturday. To Angela, my best man. Zack: When do I have to decide? Hodgins: You have to think about it?! Zack: Yes. Hodgins: Fine. Let me know what you decide.

Bones: You're welcome to stay here, if you want? Max: The couch would be great. Bones: No, Dad, I...I made up the guest room, in case you...good night.

Angela: Hey, Brennan, I'd like to ask you a favor. Well, it's not as much ask a favor as extend an honor. I mean, I hope you see it as an honor and don't think of it as some onerous duty, which I don't think you will, but then again, I've never done this before ... Brennan: Angela, just ask. Angela: Will you be my Maid of Honor, at the wedding? (after a second, Brennan suddenly grabs Angela into a big hug) Is that yes? Brennan: I am completely totally honored. Angela: Really, thought I'd have to tell you what the maid of honor - Brennan: I don't even care how awful the bridesmaids' dresses are, I'm so glad you asked me. (Angela laughs)

Bones: Angela, with all due respect to your art, facial reconstruction is a science. Angela: It's both babe, and this time, art made science her bitch. Hey, moan all you want, I stand by this. Bones: We should recheck for other indications that we got the age wrong. Zack: (Skeptically) Because art made science her bitch?

Booth: Max, you know I like you, and I hate to hurt Bones, but..uh, it's my job to catch you, and I'm very good at my job. Max: Well, you'd have to be to work with my daughter. (stands up and holds out hand) What do you say, shake hands with an old con, or-or is that bad for the F.B.I. image. Booth: You abandoned her as a child. You don't think she feels that, every time you pop in and out of her life? Max: (glares at him, but then smiles) You're just saying that so I'll hit ya, and you got a reason to lock me up. Twenty years ago, that would have worked.

Billy: Hodgins, I've got cars, and I've guitars… and I got guns. You treat my little girl right, and you'll only see the business end of the cars and guitars.

Bones: (Talking about an X-ray film) Do you know what you are looking at? Booth: (A little confused) The neck bone…..it's connected to the shoulder bone. (Bones chuckles)

Booth: (Stepping in muck at the crime scene) Oh! Whoa, whoa! Bones: Whoa, should have worn gum boots. Booth: I'm fine, you know, I'm… I'm agile.

Bones: For this to occur, she had to ... she had to look up, like this. (raises her head up straight, looking at the ceiling) Booth: Maybe she prayed a lot. Bones: (skeptically) Four to six hours a day? What did she want so badly? Max: (walks into Bones' office) Her father ... hey baby. Bones: (shocked) Dad. Max: Booth ... Booth: (draws his gun on Max) Put your hands up. Bones: (jumps out of her chair and puts her hand at Booth's arm to stop him) Booth! Max: (puts his hands up) I was hoping we could get a drink or something before this part. Booth: Max Keenan you are under arrest as an escaped felon. Max: Okay, then I guess that's no on the drink huh? Booth: Bones, grab the cuffs out of my back pocket there. Bones: No. Booth: (frustrated) What do you mean, no, Bones! Max: It's okay baby. Bones: I don't want to handcuff my own father, plus, remember when he saved your life. Max: Hey, just throw 'em over here, I'll do it myself. Booth: (to Bones) Ha, he's telling me what to do. (to Max) Put your hands on the wall. (Max turns around and puts his hands on the wall. Booth goes over to handcuff him.) Bones: Wh- Dad, what are you doing here? Max: I heard you were getting married. Bones: What?! No, Angela's getting married to Hodgins, not me. Max: Oh, the bug guy, huh, that's great. Booth: (finishes handcuffing Max) Will you shut up please. (Bones gives him a look) Well, long enough for me to Mirandize him. Max: (sarcastically) You got the right to remain silent, got it, (to Bones) we'll, we'll talk more later. Booth: Look, I'm sorry Bones, but he killed the Deputy Director of the FBI, I'm just doing my job. Bones: (to Booth) It's okay. (to Max) He's right. Max: Kisses Baby. (Booth walks him out the door past Angela who is walking in.) Angela: Uh, sweetie, was that your Dad? (Bones nods.)