Bones

Dr. Wyatt: According to the FBI report, there was no way you could save Epps' life. Your partner's report says the same thing. An FBI sniper on the upside roof saw everything through his scope. According to all witnesses you have nothing to feel guilty about. Booth: (depressed) Yeah, so? Dr. Wyatt: So why in a fit of pique did you endanger innocent people in a public thoroughfare by discharging your firearm? Booth: I'm a good shot. I didn't put anybody in danger. Dr. Wyatt: How many people have you killed? Booth: I lost count. Dr. Wyatt: Oh, you could remember 180 bricks but not how many lives you've taken? Booth: Epps makes fifty. Dr. Wyatt: Fifty what? Booth: (weighed down) Fifty kills. Dr. Wyatt: But Agent Booth, you didn't kill Epps! You tried to save him, remember? Perhaps I better put it as a question: did Howard Epps slip from your grasp or did you release him? (Booth ponders the moment Epps fell in a flashback, he can't answer) Oh, come now man, this is a simple enough question. Was he indeed your fiftieth kill or did you just happen to be there when he died? Booth: (very vulnerable) I - I don't know. Dr. Wyatt: A man like you? In control of every situation and you don't know? Booth: I don't know...I had him and then I lost him and something happened in between. (almost in a whisper) I don't know. Dr. Wyatt: I believe you. Because for a man like you to admit you don't know, to relinquish control, that could indeed argue a disruption in yourself - that was large enough to motivate you to shoot a clown.

Dr. Wyatt: You tend to do things well, don't you? Make coffee, build BBQ machines. Booth: It's not really a machine. Dr. Wyatt: Solve crimes, raise a son, love women, leave women. Whatever you aim at you hit. Booth: Is that bad? Dr. Wyatt: By no means, of course not. Except ... Booth: Oh, okay, here we go. Let me have it, Doc. Dr. Wyatt: Except it is indicative of a need to control your environment. Booth: Again I ask, is that bad? Dr. Wyatt: No, of course not, no. Except ... Booth: Except? Dr. Wyatt: Except when you shoot a clown. Booth: You know, you make it sound like he was walking around making balloon animals. Dr. Wyatt: For the most part your rebellions are small. Booth: Rebellions? Dr. Wyatt: The colorful socks, the funky belt buckle. They're a mechanism, quiet rebellions. A way of asserting your personal control over a homogenizing organization like the FBI. But shooting a clown is not a quiet rebellion. Shooting a clown is quite literally deafening.

(Booth and Brennan talking on the phone. Brennan has another call coming in) Brennan: That's Sully calling right now. (hesitant) We're, uhm, we're doing, you know, what we did. Booth: (a little worry in his voice) You know, I'll be back soon. Brennan: Ok. I'll talk to you later. (Booth hangs up and remains thoughtful and slightly worried)

(Booth is knocking at Dr. Wyatt's door) Booth: Hi. Dr. Wyatt: Did we have a schedule? Booth: Listen, I really need to get back to work, so why don't you give me one of those clown restraining orders and just sign my paper? Dr. Wyatt: Have you had an insight then as to why you shot at that clown? Booth: (Booth's cell rings) Yeah. You know what? I've had some insight. It's right here. (pointing at the display of his phone) That's my Bones calling, my partner.

Booth: Dr. Wyatt. Dr. Wyatt: Ah, Agent Booth is it? Yes, Gordon. Gordon Wyatt. (extends his hand to Booth but instead of his hand Booth pulls out a piece of paper from his back pocket) Booth: Great. You the shrink? Dr. Wyatt: Shrink, yes, meaning psychiatrist. Booth: That's great, Doc. How's about you just sign my piece of paper here and I'll get back to work, right? Dr. Wyatt: Certainly. (Booth hands him a pen) No, no, I have a pen. Do you mind if I ask what exactly it was that you did? Booth: Yeah, I shot a truck. Dr. Wyatt: Ah, full of terrorists no doubt or plutonium or fleeing felons, was it? Booth: Nah, it was an ice cream truck. Dr. Wyatt: You have a good reason for firing on it? Booth: Yeah, the music, it was bothering me. Dr. Wyatt: Ah. Booth: Yeah, there was a speaker in the clown's mouth? Yeah, I just pulled out my gun, you know, bum-bum-bum. It was gone. Dr. Wyatt: (folding the paper without signing it) So, the FBI sent you to me because you shot a clown? Booth: Not a real clown. Dr. Wyatt: (handing Booth the paper back) I suggest you cogitate on the underlying reasons why you shot that clown while I make us some tea. (goes into the house) Booth: Cogitate? Tea?

Bones: (After Booth shot the ice cream truck) That was NOT good!

Monte: Unbelievable, you people, what is it now!! Sully: Hey, hey cool your jets Hef, we just want to search your bus.

Brennan: (Asking Monte about his trip from Ft. Lauderdale to Daytona) Any girls ride with you? Monte: As much as I hate to disappoint you, uh...fact is I'm not entertaining like I used to. Sully: (Sarcastically) Aahh, getting too old to exploit little drunk girls? Monte: You seen the videos? They exploit themselves.

Booth: I told the ice cream guy I was sorry, alright, I-I-I even bought him a new clown head, so just sign the paper. (tries to hand the pen and waver to Dr. Wyatt) Dr. Wyatt: I must apologize, but I've got to go off and get some ingredients for my mortar. Um, why don't we reschedule? Booth: We can't reshcedule, alright, I-I-I got to get back to work. Dr. Wyatt: Oh, well, in that case, um ... why not finish off uh preparing this area here. Could you do that? All the specifications are on the plans. You are fit for physical labor aren't you, I mean the uh clown didn't return the fire did it? Booth: (gets up and throws down the pen) Oh, yeah and uh what if I said the plastic clown did fire back huh? Dr. Wyatt: Brilliant! Now, while I'm gone what I want you to do is to consider what you were really aiming at when you drew a beat at that unfortunate clown. Booth: Hey buddy, when I aim at something, I hit it. Dr. Wyatt: Precisely.

Sully: Okey-doke, well, if you're doing this, then there is a boat for sale that I'd like to check out. Brennan: Boat?! Booth helps. Sully: Because Booth can't relax.

Monte: Has God even fed you today Isaac?

Brennan: (Talking to Monte) You know, anthropologically speaking, you follow a very ancient tradition. Monte: Okay...Entrepreneur? Brennan: (Pointedly) Pimp.

Dr. Wyatt: You know what? I'm in America. We are men. Let's drink coffee, not tea, ay? (examining Booth's handiwork) Oh, I say. Marvelous job. Booth: Thank you. (takes a sip of the coffee) That's not coffee. Dr. Wyatt: Ah, what is it? Booth: I don't know what the hell it is, but it sure as hell isn't coffee, Doc.

Monte: (pointing at Brennan) This is you, isn't it? Brennan: Please don't point your finger at me. Monte: I knew the first time I saw you, here comes another feminist crusader, out to spoil some good, all-American fun. (shoves his hand close to Brennan's face; Brennan grabs his hand and twists it around his back) OW! Get off, get off! Brennan: (to Sully) Self defense, he assaulted me. Sully: Yes, he did.

Dr. Wyatt: Earlier you said you weren't used to drinking tea with men which suggests to me that you're usually pretty rigid in your assignment of gender roles. Booth: What? No, no. My partner is a woman, okay? A woman who needs my help. Dr. Wyatt: But are you currently involved with anyone? Booth: Just broke up with someone, okay? Me. And I ended it. Dr. Wyatt: How long had you been involved with her? Or him. Booth: Her! Let's get that straight, okay? Her. Couple of months this time. Dr. Wyatt: This time? Booth: We'd gone o- we'd gone out, b-before a a f-few years ago, and I, I, ya know, we ah, I broke it up when ah, ya know, my ex wanted to give it another go. Ah! That's it. I shot the clown because I can't let go of the women in my life. Thanks, Doc. Alright. Now I can go back to work and you can sign the (faking a British accent) papa. Dr. Wyatt: Excellent theory, but quite wrong! And, we're out of time. Tomorrow I'll wait for you?

Abigail: I thought maybe she'd hooked up. Brennan: (confused) Hooked up? (to Sully) Hooked up? Oh. With anyone in particular? Abigail: We met so many guys, you know how it is. Sully: I'm guessing she doesn't.

Sully: Okee doke. Ah, I'm gonna go grab a slice, so gimme a call when you've got an ID. (walks away) Brennan: (calling after him) Her name is Judy Dowd. Sully: Shouldn't you at least look at the x-rays before deciding that?

Cam: Sully! Sully: Cam! Look at you, in charge of moon base alpha here! Cam: And you're still a G-man! What happened to that restaurant you were gonna open, or was it a...petting zoo?

Angela: I knew it was a gator. Brennan told me it was a gator. And yet ... wow. Hodgins: Definitely confirms one thing. We have the coolest jobs ever.

Sullivan: Dr. Brennan? Brennan: Agent Sullivan? Sullivan: Uh huh. Name's Eugene. Brennan: Oh, okay Eugene. Sullivan: No. Not me. I'm Sully. Short for Sullivan.

Brennan: Is there an actual human victim? Sullivan: Inside Eugene.

(Brennan is in Florida talking on the phone to Booth who is in Washington) Brennan: I thought you said you'd be down on the next flight. Booth: I haven't met with the shrink, yet. Brennan: What shrink? Booth: Well, the department psychiatrist has to sign a piece of paper saying, you know, that I am not nuts before I get my gun back, so I got an appointment tomorrow. Brennan: (sarcastically) Great, now I have to break in this Agent Sullivan? Booth: Sully's a great guy, okay. And for your information, you never broke me in.

Zack: How would someone eat gold? Angela: Not eat, drink. Goldenrod. Brennan: Goldenrod? Angela: It's this 100 proof cinnamon schnapps that we drank in college. It's infused with real gold flakes, purely for decadence sake. Brennan: How did it taste? Angela: Well, it's way worse coming up. I can tell you that.

Monte Gold: They all want to be a Hotty Body - I walk into a place and the shirts fly off, making what used to be a rush kinda, I don't know, mundane. Brennan: Because you objectify them - you never see what makes them human. Monte Gold: (laughs incredulously) Man, you have to spend all day with her? Sully: Yeah, an actual woman - you ought to try it sometime.

Angela: (to Zack) Just because you have a doctorate now doesn't mean I won't use you as a swizzle stick.

Hodgins: I clicked on a pop-up, and got caught in a pornado.

Sully: You can only admit evidence that is in plain view, although in this bus that could be DNA on virtually any surface. Dr. Brennan: That's an image.

Dr. Wyatt: You know, in an effort to understand your culture better I've been trying to embrace this very American practice of preparing meat in the garden. Booth: Barbeque. Dr. Wyatt: Hmmm, it's a delightful word isn't it? Barbeque.

(Dr. Wyatt is pouring tea into some cups) Booth: You are really English.